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cell phone passcode

hlr2019's picture

Submitted by hlr2019 on Sat, 04/18/2020 - 11:36pm

We didn't get our daughter (my stepdaughter) for about 2 1/2-3 weeks due to the quarantine. We decided that letting her stay at her mother's was best due to not wanting to expose her. I then found out that my friend was still getting her stepdaughter and talked to my husband about this. Her mother (surprisingly) agreed to letting us take her for a month. When she first got here, i found out that there was a pin on her cellphone (reminder: she is 12 and doesn't need it). i asked her why and she told me that her mom put it on there after the last time we had her when we pissed her off by telling her to do a chore. she was smack talking us both to her mother and her father saw and took her phone. so her mother put a pin on it to keep us out. this just pissed me off and i had her give me the pin. i told her that if we need to check her phone for important things then we should be able to, especially since we were going to have her for a month. not only did she do it out of spite but she is undermining us and teaching sam that we arent as important parents as her mother. how would you all feel? 

Comments

Monkeysee's picture

Submitted by Monkeysee on Sun, 04/19/2020 - 1:49am

You left your SD’s name in at the bottom.

Considering SD gave you the pin I wouldn’t lose sleep over this, if she hadn’t given it I’d have just had DH take the phone away. BM doesn’t get to call shots like that. Difference is I wouldn’t have done any of that myself, I’d let DH do it. Life is better without this kind of drama.

tog redux's picture

Submitted by tog redux on Sun, 04/19/2020 - 9:13am

Considering you call her "our daughter", I know you will disagree with me - but IMO, it wasn't your place to demand her PIN and look through her phone, that's her actual parent's job - her father.

You personally are NOT as important of a parent as her mother. But I would agree that the father, who is as important as the mother,  has the right to know the PIN and he should have been the one insisting that his daughter give it to him.

Also, you left your SD's name in the end.

Thefatherismyfamily's picture

Submitted by Thefatherismyfamily on Sun, 04/19/2020 - 4:10pm

You addressed it by getting the pin from her. She's not an important daughter as she would be if she were your biological child I concur. I'm being sarcastic here. Don't give this too much thought. Let her dad deal with it