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alcohol debate... is it ok to get drunk in front of your children and or give under 10's alchohol?

GizmoBarnOwl's picture

just thought id sound this out as i think there is a cultural issue here as well as a moral one...

I myself have an alcoholic father and a t total mother. I feel very strongly that if on the rare occasions i drink alcohol, my daughter is staying the night elsewhere and she has never seen me drink or drunk. But she knows that Im going out and will be drinking when i do.
My partner thinks an alcoholic beverage of an evening when with the children is acceptable. I do not, i have the view that even one alcoholic drink can have an effect on your reaction times/ perception of things and when caring for your child(ren) why would you feel the need to drink?

BM drinks every night, gets drunk around the children and even gives them wine (they're 9 & 7) She's also tried to drink drive with the children resulting in the police being involved and a visit from social services.

You have just read my opinion. My question is:
Is it ever ok to drink/ get drunk around children? & How far is too far??


hammie's picture

In my culture, wine and honey are given to children but only a very little, couple ounces. My parent also used blackberry brandy on teething gums. I would never condone drinking heavily in front of children, but i dont see a problem with a drink at dinner or a nightcap style drink.
Absolutely no on the drinking games, shots, getting drunk, etc.

Stupidlyoptimistic's picture

We may have a glass or two of wine in front of our kids, but not enough to get drunk. Our kids also see that we only have a drink while we are at home, and we never drive anywhere while drinking. My parents showed me the same example. I agree with LadyFace. If you hide it, it makes it taboo and more interesting to them later on. IMO, it is a good teaching experience. 'Yes, grown ups can have a drink every so often. This is how to do so responsibly.' As, I said, my parents would have a drink or two in front of me, and I believe that is why I didn't drink as a teen. I didn't feel the need to try it with my friends because my parents were so open and honest with me. As far as BM giving the kids wine, I would take issue with that. Why is she giving them wine?

Drac0's picture

>when caring for your child(ren) why would you feel the need to drink?<

You haven't met my kids have you? Biggrin

GizmoBarnOwl's picture

Lol Draco! Interesting points all. I dont know why BM gives them alcohol. I speculate that it makes her feel better about drinking at home alone night after night, like these kids are her drinking buddies or something? - I've no idea. So much of what she says or does seem to have no rhyme or reason... I just see it as being unacceptable behaviour yet again.

BSgoinon's picture

We do have a drink or two with the kids present, at home. We NEVER drink at a restaurant and then drive home. And we would NOT get drunk with the kids around. And getting drunk is not a regular thing anyways... we are not young anymore, getting smashed is not "cool". Just makes me tired and lazy the next day and who has time for that???