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The Way BM’s word things...

Forthelifeoftheparty's picture

 It is as though she is the CEO of divorced moms everywhere. Every sentence has too many damn adverbs. They ooze drama that is “professional sounding” in the way those scam emails that pretend to alert you to an unauthorized user logging into your Apple iTunes account are. You know what I mean, Steppers? Please comment with examples so I can laugh. Ten more years. Ten more years of this psychopath. I saw her the other day. Geez does she look like dried dog poop flakes so gracefully ironic in the wind.

DH gets weekly Emails with these phrases:

Just a friendly reminder..

Thank you for the payment. Your balance is now...

Please mail payments to...

Additionally, I would like to discuss...

(when i was pregnant with our boy) Warmest Congrats!


ugh how did our DH’s ever find these women worth a night in bed?





CLove's picture

So she mainly texts things like:

"U R an Asshole"

"ty ty ty"

"when r u cumming over" (that one made me mad. She thought it was cute. lol. not)

"Ur CHILDREN should always come first they are your BLOOD."

"YU R such an asshole fuck u"

"congratulations, hope 3rd time is the charm 4 u" (when we got married and she had been married by a judge then in a backyard ceremony)

"I cant beleive u r tryin to take my baby away from me!!!!" (When she filed a child support modification order and he wanted 60/40. He lost. She got 50/49, because california, and 347 child support, but no alimony change that she wanted.)

"I hope u r happy now, ur children have been crying ALL DAY LONG" (when we got married. child was happy when he picked her up the next day, and said "now I get more and its now easier to explain you." ie shes happy.)

Forthelifeoftheparty's picture

Lolllll omg “cumming over”. Are we in middle school? At least she is dumb. DH’s ex is an evil genius. Well, she just has no soul so it is easy to do wicked things. If she were smart she would have figured out how to color her roots by now. 

Forthelifeoftheparty's picture

Ok I just got an amazing idea. Somebody should invent a chat bot to respond to BMs nonsense. It would be programmed to respond with neutral answers like “OK” and “Thank you for the information.” It would then alert DH to certain key phrases or alert him to dates and times he may need to be aware of.

Then these stupid manipulative BMs wouldn’t be stealing time and energy from a happy home with their nonsense.

My God! I wish I knew how to code this! It MUST be possible. 

Aniki's picture

"Can you give me 5k on Friday?"

A better canned response might be "I see", or something equally noncommittal.

Survivingstephell's picture

Let me think about that and I will get back to you.     

File said email in the dead file.. 

notasm3's picture

OMG - you all make me so grateful that SS was an adult when I met DH. And that BM’s Uber controlling DH wanted nothing to do with SS.  I have no idea what happened in past years before BM remarried. 

Lndsy747's picture

Maturity dictates that I focus on my daughter and her well being. 

I'm livid for every reason that a good mother would be.

I wish you well.

Forthelifeoftheparty's picture

BM must be sooooo smart if those are her phrases. LOL Wink

Lndsy747's picture

She's a counselor and was a family therapist previously so she knows all the right ways to handle everything

tog redux's picture

BM here signed all of her emails:


It was so passive-aggressive.  Her manifestos were the worst, I have flashbacks just thinking about them.

tog redux's picture

Some of them were. My personal favorite was the one where she blamed my DH for SS not doing a homework assignment at HER house, because she was supposedly using DH's "method of helping SS with homework", and it failed him.  Had she used her own method of helping, he would have done the assignment, but in the interest of co-parenting, she was trying the method that DH uses.

What?!  Crazy twisting around of everything to make herself look blameless.

Forthelifeoftheparty's picture

”per our aggreement” is a classic because rarely if ever exists said aggreement.

Jcksjj's picture

BM tends to be overly proper and polite and tries to sound extremely intelligent and condescending to start with. Until she gets worked up and then it's all typos and word salad and none of it makes any sense. You can see the crazy come out in the messages and it's hilarious. She once sent him 45 texts from 8 am to 2 am without him replying. She also likes to give us parenting tips we dont need and dont reply to and sends me "friendly reminders" about school things as if I dont have a child myself in the same grade at the same school and dont get all the same notifications from the school that her and also DH do.

Forthelifeoftheparty's picture

I often want to reply, “Friendly Reminder, we want nothing to do with you no matter how important you believe yourself to be in your imaginary world.”

Yeah, everything is automated by the schools. So why are you, BM, emailing us to “keep us in the loop” that SD13 stayed home from school but yet you neglect to tell us when she has a counseling appt?

Step-girlfriend's picture

BM here has the IQ of a goldfish, so when she tries to sound professional she ends up sounding like a complete idiot. Her favorite things to say are:

I will pick MY kids up at x time, and then I will drop MY kids off at x time. She says this to my SO...

Literally 75% of her messages say (insert stupid accusation here) “is unacceptable”. Except sometimes she writes “unacceptionable” instead of unacceptable, and then we laugh and laugh at her...

She posted on FB using SS’s account saying “I wish my dads gf would play with me and my sister more, all she does is talk to my dad”...and an hour later posted (again, posing as SS) “Sorry your house got foreclosured on Step-girlfriend”. Not only had she looked up the wrong person (I’ve never owned a house), she thinks it’s “foreclosured”. 

I can’t with her. 

Forthelifeoftheparty's picture

You and your DH laugh and laugh. And now so do I. Wow. That is pitiful.

justmakingthebest's picture

We get no response... ever. Sometimes SS will respond for her and say things like "It isn't my mom's fault that I don't want to tell you things" or "leave my mom out of it- it is up to me if I have visitation with you" .... so that's cool.

I could totally see how her e-mails would make you eyeroll but at least they are professional and not crazy or no communication at all thanks to serious PAS!

Forthelifeoftheparty's picture

You think because they are “professional”, there is no PAS going on and no crazy happening? HAHAHAHA

No communication except for an emergency would be a dream come true. 

justmakingthebest's picture

No, there can totally be PAS going on, sorry! I would just take anything over nothing at this point.

Forthelifeoftheparty's picture

Gosh i would love no communication. As long as visits continued regularly. 

Forthelifeoftheparty's picture


iamlosingit's picture

BM has very poor English most of her messages need to be picked apart to see what she is trying to get at:

I will be taking MY BABY on vacations next week (she means one vacation, and never gives DH any details even though the CO states that she must provide a trip itinerary)

Did you decide you are not to be seeing SS today?

(on a non visitation day due to the holiday schedule that she never follows.  Tried to guilt trip DH for not picking up SS that day)

You have to be paying these doctor bills for SS you not helping me with any of it  

 (after DH told her repeatedly he was not going to support the extra doctor visit expense for something that could be treated with over the counter medication.  She ignored him and didn't tell him, we got surprise bills in the mail.  He paid $250 on the first visit and is refusing to contribute to the remaining balance)


(one hour before drop off after she had SS for over a week due to the holiday schedule, yet she hadn't even made him start the report.  She kept SS home from school the following day without telling DH so SS could "finish it")

_____ has a doctor appointments at 3 will be seeing you there

(Never lets DH know when SS has doctor appointments.  This was 1.5 hours before said appointment, didn't even tell DH what it was for and expected him to drop everything and go.  He couldn't go, he was at work)

Is your responsibility, you have responsibility!

(any time she wants something done for SS that he doesn't need or require, all of a sudden she is all about "responsibility")



Livingoutloud's picture

“I love you so much. G_d Bless you”.

Endless texts to YSD who’s been estranged from BM for years. She blocked violent BM from everywhere for years but she recently opened up now for texts because there was a talk about BM being very sick. Don’t know about that. YSD never replies to her. BM just sends these texts periodically. Nothing else there. Just those two sentences 

when DH still had some type of contact with BM that’s what she liked to send “I am a goof person. Everyone knows I am a good person. And because of me being a good person I (insert demand or want or expect etc). When they were married it was her daily mantra “I am a good person”. She is blocked from everywhere so zero communication now 

Iamwoman's picture

Yes, HCBM seems to regularly use her thesaurus in email communication to DH.

The difference between someone who was raised with emphasis on a large vocabulary and someone who randomly throws rare or multi-syllable words into a sea of idiotic drivel is painfully obvious. Painfully.

To answer want2's question about why a SM would even read BM emails or texts: It's amusing. For me, HCBM owes me some laughter to compensate for all of her ridiculous drama. To sit there and laugh at her idiocy as if I am a queen and she were my court jester is simply satisfying.

Frazzled2020's picture

BM constantly says that everything my husband says or does is wrong. So a go to for her is that he lies. 

hubby tells bm the kids brushed their teeth. 
"You lied. the 9 yo told me he doesn't remember brushing his teeth all weekend!" 

"this isn't the first time your stories don't match the kids (9 and 12)" 

the best one so far thiugh. 

"I have never called you a liar but your emails are riddled with lies."