OT My own BM won't help herself
My BM is a narcissist, no doubt about it. As a child, she would "punish" me if I didn't do exactly what she wanted me to do. This was everything - wear my hair, friends, school, I didn't want to go to college, jointed the army, didn't rely on her permission for my every move. I had my own brain and I used it. A narcissistic mother's worse nightmare: a child who insists on thinking for themselves. She also admitted to me once that my brother was her favourite child.
So to say we have a rocky relationship is an understatement. I wouldn't really even consider it a relationship at this point. It is merely the fact that I know this woman gave birth to me sort of connection. It is sad but it is what she's made it.
She lives with my "brother" and his male partner. I place that word in quotes because he is not someone I know anymore. He is, quite literally, a monster. His partner is an even bigger monster. My brother goes along with all of it. They have stolen enormous amounts of money from both sides of the family. They lie, cheat, steal, abuse and live the grand old dirt bag's life. Nearly $200,000 they've swindled yet I found out the other week they've filed bankruptcy. For the second time.
They are both abusive, in every sense of the word. My BM refuses to leave. Refuses to help herself, acknowledge it for what it is. She will not do anything. Worse yet my frail and very sick great Aunt lives there too. BM won't help herself or her Aunt. My BS17 says brother and partner abuse them too. How the hell do you abuse 2 old women?! My BM will be 69 this year and Aunt is 82.
It's disgusting. My BM will say she has no choice. I give her choices. But that would mean making an effort. It would mean doing something. It would mean acknowledging that her precious little angel son is a demon from hell. And we all know that narcissists can't be wrong.
So there she stays, with her frail, dying Aunt, in the house of horrors. They are so bad that not one family member, on either side, talks to brother or partner anymore. Partner's parents have literally disowned him and written him out of their will and life. No one has anything to do with anyone in that household. My BM will report back to them if anyone tries to help her or talk to her. She is their little informant.
I don't really know why I'm writing this except I just need to get it out of my head. My whole childhood family has turned into strangers that I don't even know anymore. My own BD passed away 4 years ago. Everything and everyone I grew up with is gone or so badly tainted that it's ruined. Doesn't exist.
Sometimes I just sit and think what the hell happened and how did it all go so wrong??