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They're back.....

Charly's picture

My boys returned home from their Dad's house this past Friday and we will be switching off every other week through out the summer. DH has been in a foul mood since they've been home. I was of course excited to see my boys and I was also excited to have some time with just my boys and DH. This never happens, we have skids 24/7 and my boys are only with us 50% of the time. I haven't spent time alone with my boys in quite a while. DH has been grumpy and I assumed it was because his precious darlings haven't been home, this thought was confirmed last night when the skids came home after spending all of June and part of July with Grandparents. DH was giddy. He had a big 'ole smile that stretched coast to coast. I don't know why but that just really pissed me off.

I don't have a crap attitude when it's just DH and his kids. I don't jump down their throats because I'm missing my boys. I am pleasant, I have fun with them.

I was dreading the return of the skids due to a process DH and I will have to perform that I call "degrandmaization" This is when you have to re introduce the word no to the kids vocabluary after not hearing it for almost 2 months while being with Grandma. You also have to remind them that when the word no is spoken by a parent, there is no argument. No is the final word and as a child, you have accept that. No arguments. No is no. I was also dreading their return because this means no more breaks. No more alone time with my husband. BM is on "vacation" in the land of barbed wire fences and iron bars. I truly enjoyed my alone time with my husband and now all the drama of blending a family has returned.

DH and his eldest son have a strong bond. SS14 is his buddy. I realized last night as I listened to them talking that a lot of our conflict is because DH puts SS14 in my place a lot. While they were gone there was no conflict because DH had me placed in my rightful spot, by his side. I have been dethroned as of last night.

DH is obsessed with the show Dallas. He loves it. We have been watching it from the comfort of our bed since the new series started. He asks SS14 if he's been watching it. SS says he's caught a couple episodes and DH tells him he needs to catch up so THEY can watch it together.... okay, guess I wasn't a good enough Dallas watchin buddy..

SS mentions that his bball camp is next week, so DH tells him they should work out together in the mornings, ya know, to get him ready for camp. There is only enough room for two people to work out in our media room, so guess who just got kicked out of her morning work out? Yep, that would be me.

Then there is the issue of the cost of camp. SS was supposed to work while at Grandmas to earn money to pay for part of this camp. He worked, earned money, and spent it on bball shoes. This wouldn't be that big of a deal if he didn't already have 4 other pairs. The kid has no flip flops, sandals, or nice shoes, but he does have 5 pairs of bball shoes. He also broke my son's bike, and was told 3 MONTHS ago that he was responsible for replacing it. Has he done it yet? Nope, has he mentioned taking care of it? Nope. So he has $23 to his name and needs $100 to pay for camp, and $50 to replace the bike part. The shoes were $175.... So DH tells him no worries, you'll work for me! Go shovel some dirt around in the back yard and I'll cover what your short.... Gee DH, if I could make $150 shoveling dirt for an hour, I'd quit my job in a heartbeat! He didn't discuss this with me, just made that decision with our money by himself. I need clothes for my new job I'm starting on Monday, guess it's more important that SS get to bball camp...

So, they're back. DH is in a super chipper mood now, and I'm in a grumpy mood, partly to show him what it's like when your spouse is an ass when your kids come home and you are excited, partly because I'm just annoyed that they're back.... So that's my pity party and yes I'll have some cheese with my wine.