You are here

Bratty comments on my FB post

caninelover's picture

So last Friday I celebrated my 50th birthday.  SO and I took the long weekend and went to Catalina island to celebrate.  We had a fabulous time, we kayaked and parasailed, ate and drank.  I posted some pictures on FB on Saturday from parasailing.  

One comment came from Bratty and was nice - she hoped I had a nice birthday.  I replied Thank You.  Of course in Stepland that leaves me to wonder whether Bratty is gearing up to ask for a visit.   The recent trend seems to be some nice comment or text a few weeks before asking to freeload something (Disneyland tickets, or a stay at our house).   I think she may want to visit over a specific weekend in early June since there is an event that is happening that she loves (was virtual the last 2 years due to the pandemic, but in person this year).

I mentioned this to SO and he shrugged and said he's not going to worry about something that hasn't happened yet.  Fair point. 

It is possible that a cigar is just a cigar and I'm reading too much into her comment, when I should just take it at face value. But all the years of dealing with her take their toll, and it always leaves me on guard and suspicious whenever she does reach out. 

We'll see if she does ask for a visit.  If so, she and SO will need to respect the rules we laid out - reasonable notice, communicate a schedule then stick with it, and SO will need to host.  So hope he brushes up on his vegan recipes Smile

 

 

Comments

missgingersnap2021's picture

Just be happy you had a nice weekend! My post was about my weekend and how is was basically shit becuase of BM drama and DH's surly mood. I deleted all the photos I had taken becuase I want no memory of it!

caninelover's picture

Our weekend was just perfect and I'm so appreciative - SO planned it all out and we both loved it. 

I'm sorry your anniversary celebration was clouded by stepdrama.  

JRI's picture

In the perfect world, Bratty has gained maturity and wishes you a happy birthday, like an adult does.  But steplife leaves scars so everything she does is suspect.  It's a shame but that's how it is.  And, sadly, our gut is often right.

caninelover's picture

We'll see if she if does want something in the next month or so.  If not, then I'll need to work on letting go of the scrutiny of every tiny comment LOL.

Exjuliemccoy's picture

After you've been in the step trenches a while, it becomes natural to over analyze and be jaded. It's just a way of coping.

Love Catalina! It's a little like being in the Mediterranean, just closer. I've not parasailed there, but enjoyed kayaking. Turned out one of the people working for the kayaking company hails from the same small town as me, so we had a great time chatting. 

caninelover's picture

It was the first time there for both of us!  Yes it is very special and we'll definitely return!

MissK03's picture

Happy Birthday!! Glad you had a great weekend! It is always hard to tell the difference between genuine (if any) responses and ones that have other meaning.

caninelover's picture

And yes, especially after experiencing 'nice' comments in the past and realizing they were buttering meup to ask for something.  Like one nice comment is supposed to erase the whole prior history.

 

Dogmom1321's picture

Happy Bday!

Seems innocent enough... SD12 would have made it into some backhanded comment like "Happy Bday! Wish Dad would have ______ for me." 

I don't plan on ever having SD on social media. She has my phone number if she would want to call or text a happy birthday. Otherwise, I would feel having SD on my 'friends' list is just for her to spy. 

caninelover's picture

Bratty does see all my posts and has mentioned that to SO.  I don't really have anything to hide and frankly - let Bratty see how great my life is since disengaging.

Merry's picture

Happy birthday!

Here in Stepland we experience a trauma response to something otherwise normal, or the history of gaslighting is such that we don't trust our normal response to a normal situation.

I totally get this. My steps can be nice people, and they are nice to me more often than not. But I am always on high alert.

caninelover's picture

I wonder if the high alert ever goes away...