To Brunch...or Not To Brunch?
That is the question...
Quick background: Narc SD24 Bratty McBratFace will be in town this weekend with Nutter GF for a wedding (Nutter GF's family). They are staying at a hotel where the wedding is, so will not be staying with us.
I dislike Bratty (and have chronicled our history on this site) and have been disengaged for a year and half now. During that time, Bratty has still tried to freeload off of me (Disneyland tickets) and asked SO about that again for this visit. She also asked him if we would tour Nutter GF's parents around on Sunday. SO said a clear no to both requests.
SO and Bratty did arrange for brunch on Sunday at a vegan cafe (LOL) for SO to meet Nutter GF. I am invited to go.
SO and I had a bit of an argument yesterday that was started by him making a dismissive comment about my niece's horse-riding skills (she posted a picture of her performing a jump on her horse and SO said 'what a little jump' or something snarky like that). That, along with the upcoming brunch date, triggered me to unload on him. I asked him how he would react if I made a comment like that about Bratty. He was silent but then he said we should not be expected to hold things back from each other. OH REALLY?? Do you really think I see Bratty with the same rose-colored glasses you do? I do hold back because if I say what I really think all the time it will result in an argument. He also asked why a comment about my niece was causing all this to come up. I told him I was definitely anxious about the upcoming brunch. I dislike Bratty, and I definitely dislike how he ignores her poor behavior around me. He started to understand that his past inaction with Bratty was still upsetting me - I told him I could forgive but not forget. And I don't want to put myself in future situations where Bratty has more opportunities to disrespect me.
He said he was sorry for not stepping up in the past. I brought up Thanksgiving 2018 again - where Bratty turned temporarily vegan as I pulling dishes out of the over. Then asked to eat at Boston Market the next day. That day he snapped at me but said nothing to Bratty. I told him how much that still stings, to this day. And I wasn't keen on sitting across a table from Bratty again, having her throw more shade at me, with SO just avoiding it because he was just grateful for whatever scraps of attention he gets from her.
He said he understood and was sorry it still hurts to this day. He said it was completely up to me to go to brunch or not. And if I went, and if Bratty so much as looks cross-eyed at me, he would get up and leave the restaurant with me.
I feel stuck again. Do I want to see Bratty? Nope, nope, nope. Do I want to support SO? Yes - but not if he's not going to support ME by not allowing his child to disrespect me. He says he won't let that happen again. I'm not sure I'm in a great headspace with any of this right now.
Do I brunch, or do I not brunch? What say you?