I have no idea what is going to happen now....H is talking possible/probable lay-offs
With the economy, watching this and that business go under, now they are talking about work stoppage for H's employer. Possibly as soon as March. And I, of course, now studying like a mad woman to get thru A & P so I could go to RT in the fall. And H is saying "You might have to just finish the A & P and find a job instead of going to school". Ummm, I was looking for a job right up to the time I started this course. Nothing out there. In fact, a major employer in our little town just shut down for 3 weeks, and has not reopened as of yet-and that was 4 weeks ago. They manufacture auto parts...may never reopen.
So, I'm still going to work thru this A & P. And IF I do have to give up on the RT in the fall, guess what? No way am I working to send SD17 thru college, when I have to give it up. No way. Sure that hasn't occured to H. But, by gosh, it will. I'm not blaming him if there's work stoppage...but he'd better know that I'm not working to support SD17 thru college.
As it is, H is a total financial mess. He has a house (tiny) here that he owes double what it's worth. I tried to talk to him about going to his bank and trying to get them to allow him to "short sell" it, but he has totally ignored me. Just as he has totally ignored the fact that he is over $4,000 behind in back taxes on this same house. Oh well. Not my problem. I've made him aware of the facts, but he has chosen to do nothing about it.
If I have to give up going to school, and find a job (that would be an 8 to 5 job here-if I can find one, same hours as school-8 to 3), H had better batten his latches. Because I will not sacrifice the rest of my life to his overindulged daughter.
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Need to add-this man, who is so tight with me on the grocery
"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere
money-and yes, we did but several thousand in savings last month-has wasted mored money than what my paycheck would be. In the last month, we've had Christmas (really expensive) and then, H bought a TV for the downstairs bedroom, a DVD for that TV, and a new mattress topper-that's $600.00 extra on top of Christmas. And all his decision.
Meanwhile, the things that actually need done here-the toilet has leaked, evidently when this house was rented out 2 years ago, and the subfloor needs replaced. Badly. H, as usual, ignores it. What is with him? the money on the tv, dvd should have gone to those back taxes...or been used toward replacing that subfloor. I've learned that if something isn't a cosmetic fix up, if the money is spent on actual needs, H isn't happy. He just wants things to "look good" and the heck with the actual structure of them.
Oh well. Just another rant for me.
Oh, mustang, I know. Trust me, if I have to give this up and get
"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere
full time work, we won't last a month. Not just because of how he was when this marriage began, not just because of his moods, not just because of SD17. But because he has shown me his true colors, and I don't much like them.
Stay the course stay in school...
Do whatever you can. Apply for financial aid ask for loan from a family member or something. I agree with Mustang1 you need to look out for you.
I thought you guys were breaking up?
I thought you were done? I must have missed a post somewhere because I thought you were waiting til your son went home after the holidays til you filed for divorce. Yes I know you don't have a job but are going to school. If your H loses his job and you have to quit school and get another job what is the point of him being around? You need to worry about yourself and yourself only - your family already knows he treats you like crap I'm sure they would help you with ANYTHING you needed!. I agree with mustang and A too.
Oh, ema, I'm not going to stay in this mess
"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere
any longer than I have to. IF I have to quit school and get a job, I assure you it will be for my own self-he will be out!
I cannot borrow money from family-my parents are retired, and living on SS. My older sister's husband has been laid off for over a year now, and gets temporarily called back occassionally.
My younger sis has a daughter going to college in the fall. Times are tough everywhere.
IF I have to quit school to get a job, I will go to work. I will divorce H. Then I will go back to school as a single woman. I'll work it out some way.
Good girl!
I understand what you are saying. You are putting up with his ass just long enough to finish with school and get a good job. I was in a spot like this a long time ago myself with my ex and i quit school and went and got a job cuz I couldn't take it anymore. You will know when your breaking point is.
Screw Him!
He doesn't deserve you or your money. He made his bed and now he can lay in it without you.
Girl, you don't need any advice. You seemed to have worked it all out already. You know what your a going to do if he does or doesn't get laid off work and weather you will have to postpone school or not. The best part is that no matter which may you go, your end result is the same (No more H or leeches and more time for you).
Good Luck babe, I'm rooting for you always.
Screw Him!
He doesn't deserve you or your money. He made his bed and now he can lay in it without you.
Girl, you don't need any advice. You seemed to have worked it all out already. You know what your a going to do if he does or doesn't get laid off work and weather you will have to postpone school or not. The best part is that no matter which may you go, your end result is the same (No more H or leeches and more time for you).
Good Luck babe, I'm rooting for you always.