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Got a hold of the BM!

AshMar654's picture

Yup DH got a hold of her last night. Contacted a few people and I found her husbands number on-line. Anyway after a few messages and a person getting a hold of her to tell her to call DH she did.

She agreed to sign the document and was happy SS has a family and mom according to DH. Looks like all this will go smoothly and there will be no issues with me officially adopting my SS. Yay! I am really happy but I think I will be over the moon when all is said and done.

They did talk a little about a some stuff. DH told her that if SS ever ask about her he is will be honest and let him reach out to her when he wants to. I am guessing at this point she is just happy he has a good life an maybe she stepped away because she knew he would b taken care of and she could not give him the life that DH and his parents could. I am not really sure.

I am relieved about everything as well. I am happy knowing that if anything ever happened to DH, SS would not be taken away from me. I can access all his stuff and talk to the school and just be his mom without having to jump through hoops.

Comments

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

Congratulations!!! That's really best case scenerio for you!!! I'm thrilled for you!

SteppedOut's picture

This is great news! 

Does SS know his mom has to sign the document in order for the adoption to go through? If so, maybe prepare for... well, all of those finalized "my bio-mom really doesn't want me" feelings. 

It's both a very sad and very happy time for your SS. 

AshMar654's picture

Yes he knows but we have explained it in a good way. We simply say that we need to ask her permission for me to legally be your mom. Those feelings may arise not saying that they won't but he is the kind of kid that does not think too deep about things.

He has no memories of her what so ever. This is his normal in his mind. He has had a lot of love around him and always been cared for. We talk to him and are honest with him. Only time will tell.

SteppedOut's picture

Good.

You have been and are a wonderful mom to him! 

HowLongIsForever's picture

So happy for you that the process is moving forward, and smoothly! 

I know there have been a lot of concerns and you guys have tackled all of it with intelligence, patience, compassion and love.  That's awesome.

Congrats to you all!

AshMar654's picture

Thank you all for the support. I am grateful that things are going smoothly. I have decided to put my mind in a good place about his BM and be grateful to her. I am going to try really hard to not let the wonder of how or why she has not been in SS's life.

Instead I am going to be grateful to her as she is giving me an amazing gift. I get my wish and I owe it to her.

Moors13's picture

that’s so great. My SS’s BD hit us with a petition of custody after we told him of our plans to adopt. He wouldn’t give us his address and three days later we got served. Hoping for the best. He has committed felonies, been absent for four years, was arrested for child abuse (cops did nothing) and for domestic violence (cops did nothing).  Hope it works out for you.