I posted previously about a hateful adult stepdaughter that verbally attacked me in a most nasty way out of the blue (I had done nothing to her): https://www.steptalk.org/node/234711

Just some additional background that will lead to my question....I had been concerned to find out she was trying to get her brother SD17 to hate me. I had never mentioned the younger brother (SD14) as I did not think he could be an issue. He has always been the most accepting of me (yet a bit immature for his age), very sensitive and sweet kid. We would even play funny jokes on each other. I had always been concerned though that he had some type of attention issues....I noticed he would either be so intently focused on the TV for example his Dad would have to yell his name LOUDLY 3 times before he heard his dad talking to him. Many times SD14 has difficulty focusing on tasks...his dad must still stand by to keep re-directing him to complete his homework, or to finishing cleaning his room.

I also know SD20 has now talked to him about the situation regarding me (trying to get him to hate me also and trying to convince him her father is wrong for expecting her to apologize to us). Boyfriend told SD20 she is not welcome in our home for any visits until she atones for her bad behavior (as described in my older post.). It did worry me though that SS14 was always easily influenced by her.

Over the past year there were few strange incidents where SD14 did something (he would not admit to the action or either he didn't realize he did it). A small knife ended up on an Orange Juice container and we didn't see it until almost the end of the OJ. Sometimes my boyfriend drinks the last bit of OJ straight from the bottle at the end. SS14 said he uses a knife to open the OJ bottle but that he never dropped one inside. We gave him the benefit of the doubt it was an accident.

Then one day I came home from work to find a picture of me on my horse (that I attached a large show ribbon to the side of the frame) with the show ribbon now covering my face in the picture. Sure it could be a joke he is playing, or maybe it got knocked off and just happened to put it back up covering my face. But then I noticed special dog treats I had just bought for MY dogs (the hard chewing type) smashed to pieces in their bag on the counter. Now then I put all this together, and suddenly got filled with dread something is very wrong. Not sure if I am being paranoid, but this is all just too weird. I approached boyfriend about being concerned his son is not remembering these incidents and his actions. But later I put it all together and now I'm afraid it goes deeper to me and crap his sister might have succeeded in influencing.

I'm not a bio parent, so any insight to this situation would be greatly appreciated. I did tell boyfriend I thought he should speak to his son's pediatrician or school counselor about this so they could advise him further. I have my doubts he will do this because he doesn't want to believe his child had some kind of attention issue (or worse now anger and resentment of now blaming me for the situation with his sister)