SS14 comes up from the kid cave to get a charger for SS12's phone...what are you doing? Getting a charger for brother. He can come get his own, if he needs it. He's down there playing video games, he doesn't need it. Okay. Two minutes later, SS14 comes up with his pillow, and grabs the charger and starts heading upstairs to his room. What do you need the charger for? To charge brother's phone. No, if it needs to be charged it can be charged down here, not up in your room, your phone has been taken away from you, that does not mean you now have the run of SS12's phone. The whole reason he wants the phone is so grandma (meddling MIL) can call or he can call her...or to text BM. There were 15 calls back and forth between MIL and SS12's phone the day before, (which she has maybe called a TOTAL of 15 times since he got the phone 8 months ago...because SS14 is her "special" boy) and five calls already that morning. If Grandma wants to call SS14 she can call DH...so he can see just how ridiculous it is that MIL is calling so often to speak to SS14...it's weird...just weird.
SS14 didn't like that much and I got a snotty FINE.

So I was in SS14's room and his drawer was open...and I see his "pocket" knife and a lighter in the drawer. Now the knife was given to him by BM for Christmas...this isn't an ordinary little pocket knife...it's handle is appx 3" and when you pull the blade that's another appx 3" It's more like a knife to gut fish or deer...the kid doesn't hunt or fish...he plays video games...he has no reason for a knife, but BM got it at Christmas for him and he brought it home that day. I saw it and talked to DH about the fact that I do not agree with him having a knife, he is not responsible nor mature enough for it, BM wants to give him one then we have no say in that, but I do NOT want it in my home. EVER. SS can't put anything away and I have a 7 yr old son...and a very immature SS12 that I do not want it around. So DH does tell SS that the knife goes back to mom's and doesn't come here. Well a month later the knife shows up again. Again, discussion with SS. This happens two more times. About a month ago SS14 brought it with him to school, and was seen with it before heading on the bus to his BM for his weekly visit. I texted SS and informed him the knife STAYS at BM's and under NO circumstances should it have EVER been brought to school. He says, I forgot to take it out of my pocket when I got back home (which means he took it to school Mon morning and now again Wed) and I was jut bringing it back to BM's. NEVER EVER AGAIN DOES IT GO TO SCHOOL! okay!

Well...here it is, and now he has the knife AND a lighter. Okay, maybe right now I have a little bias against the kid as of late, but his behavior shows he can't be trusted, the counselor agrees he is a troubled teen, and has emotional and anger issues...MORE REASON HE DOESN'T NEED IT. So I take the lighter, and leave the knife. The more I think about it, I decide I will take the knife also and SS can ask for it, and I will reiterate it does not come back or next time it is gone. I went to get the knife...it's gone. SS must have noticed lighter was gone and took it to church with us yesterday morning. So I am in the bathroom gathering the laundry from the hamper as SSs are in their rooms getting a few things they want to bring to BM's and walk by. I say "hey SS come here a second...both boys stop. I tell SS12 he can continue, I only need to talk to SS14. I am going to tell you this, just this one last time, if the knife shows up in MY home again, it will be taken away. It will be gone. For good. You WILL NOT get it back." SS14 replies, "I forgot it in my pocket when I came here" I respond, "I don't want to hear that excuse, I've heard it enough times from you. It's not a small pocket knife, therefore it's hard to forget it is in your pocket. I don't care if you do forget about it, you can remember to pack things you want to bring to BM, then you can remember to take the knife out of your pocket. If it comes back it will be gone for good." SS14 responds, "FINE!" and after a couple seconds of silence, "Can I have my lighter back?" Me: "No. What do you have a lighter for anyway? You don't need a lighter and no you aren't getting it back" SS14: " I have it for making fires. When I'm camping" Me: "You went camping in your BM's bf's yard...(granted they live in the country), are you the one starting the fires? Is there and adult around when you do this? Does your BM know you are starting fires?" SS14: (with a pause, and at first not looking at me) "Yes, she knows. Sometimes there are adults there. Can I have it back?" Me: "Well, I don't think you at 14 should be left responsible for a fire, especially with fire danger at the level it is, but that's your mom's decision. If she has no problem with it, and her bf has no problem with it they can deal with whatever damage may be caused. However, is she gave you that lighter so you can start fires, then you can tell her you need a new one, because you lost the one she gave you." The look on SS14's face was a little pissy...not sure BM actually DOES know he is starting fires...however, it wouldn't surprise me if she in fact did let him do it. Yes, she's that fricking dense. I left it with SS14 at, so have a good week with BM...bye.

Waiting to see if he says anything to BM. The psycho will text or call DH about it, and my threatening to take the knife SHE bought (I won't if it's not at MY house!) and the lighter because she is that nuts. Or she will call MIL and bitch about it, to which MIL will hold a chat with her about the shitty person I am and how mean to SS14 I am and then MIL will call DH and start on him too...but I had a great sense of satisfaction telling SS14 I will take the knife, and it will be GONE because it does NOT belong IN MY HOME.

Go ahead SS14...whine to Daddy, and BM and Grandma...I dare you!