Thank you cards
Forums:
So this weekend is SS18's graduation party. He has been getting cards and gifts in the mail everyday. He's too important to be bothered to open them. I feel that he needs to sit his butt down and write thank you cards to all these people. Several of them are from people in my life: MY FRIENDS, MY FAMILY. I feel like it's going to reflect poorly on me if the little ingrate doesn't acknowledge any of the people who are taking the time to congratulate him. Irritates me so much. I WILL NOT DO IT FOR HIM. I VOW THAT!
I'm holding out tiny amounts of hope he will do it after the party is over. Should I tell my husband to make him? How is this not common sense?
He's an 18 year old boy.
He's an 18 year old boy. Guaranteed he doesn't know what a Thank you card is.
I rarely send thank you cards. I think an email/text or phone call to say thank you is sufficient enough.
Explain proper etiquette to
Explain proper etiquette to him in this situation. Or have your DH do it.
I certainly wouldn't hold out hope that he will just do it.
He won't just do it. Hold
He won't just do it. Hold something over his head until his thank you cards are done. Have your DH take him to get the cards or just pick some up, give him the addresses that you have and tell him he needs to get the rest. Do a "sample" thank you card for him so he knows what is expected and suggest he do x amount per day or spend Sunday afternoon knocking them out. (I realize this should have been done with him as an 8 year old but if it hasn't you/your DH will have to walk him through how to do it) He needs to understand that people made an effort to send a card/attend his party and he should be grateful for that and the least he can do is sign a card since they all signed checks.
I just made my 18-year-old BS
I just made my 18-year-old BS send them out following his birthday. I've always made him to thank yous for birthdays and Christmas, since he was little. I HOPE it's something he continues as an adult, but it's not likely. BS is one of the most considerate, thoughtful kids I know, but I have to hound him to write those notes every damn time.
I think it's hard in this new era of shooting off quick emails or texts. Writing notes or letters is falling by the wayside.
I agree that this is classic
I agree that this is classic etiquette. I don't want to raise children that are ungrateful. If I spend time going to a function and giving a gift, especially monetary, I feel this is the right thing to do. I had a friend that "never got around to" writing hers out for her wedding. I found that it left a bad taste in my mouth after everyone did so much for her. Appreciation is never outdated. Also...he will have a hard time sending all these people texts...see my previous posts. LOL
Thank you cards in my books
Thank you cards in my books are absolutely required for graduation gifts. I told my SD that they were required and she ignored me. When I found out that my stepdad had sent her a check for $50 and she didn't thank him in anyway (text, FB, etc), I blew a gasket. I told her here is a man who is retired, on a fixed income, he took the time and gas to drive to the store, get you a card, write you a check, affix a stamp and mail that and you don't even have the decency to send him a thank you card. She finally did it months later but guess what, nobody in my family buys the SK's anything anymore. Their loss. My opinion is you get one gift from me, if I don't get a thank you card, you don't get another gift. And no a text or FB message are not good enough.
Agree! Graduation, wedding
Agree! Graduation, wedding shower, wedding, baby shower, baby, retirement or any other type of career party requires a thank you card.
Birthdays- I don't think it's necessary unless it was like a surprise party planned for an adult then I think you take the time to thank those that made it possible
Christmas- also not really necessary IMO
We actually got a lot of crap
We actually got a lot of crap from DH's family because we didn't sent announcements out at all. I told them they should have known when their precious baby was graduating and after reading up on the etiquette of announcements it's the actual graduate who is supposed to sent them, not mommy and daddy.
Does a card alone require a
Does a card alone require a thank you? Does a thank you card require a thank you?
Certainly any gifts require a thanks but verbally seems enough as long as he doesn't wait until next Christmas. He is a kid so Daddy should stand over him while he calls all of the gift givers.
I see your point about the
I see your point about the slippery slope of the thank you but I still disagree when it comes to graduations/weddings/babies/retirement etc.
I think kids and teenagers especially are pretty clueless as to what it takes to be an adult in the financial sense of maintaining a home, car, paying bills, buying groceries etc. If someone takes time out of their schedule to recognize you and/or includes a gift then it's our job as parents to teach our children that it truly is generous and to teach our children that it is something to be grateful for. Showing appreciation by writing notes in a few cards is the least they can do.
This made me crack up! Thank
This made me crack up! Thank you
I like the idea of snatching
I like the idea of snatching up the cards!!! LOL
But, yes, I would bring it up to DH. I mean, it is a common courtesy/respect/etiquette life lesson. BS19 is graduating, and the first card he got, he looked at me and said, "I need to do thank you cards!" I told him I already had that covered, and once we got his senior pictures done, I was ordering some custom cards. He still needs to write all the messages on them, but it doesn't have to be a long novel...a simple little personal note is enough...even just one sentence.
In general, I think kids these days are too impersonal. With texting, social media, etc....they think they are plugged into the world, and they have lost that personal touch that we were all taught to value.
agree. plus a lot of the
agree. plus a lot of the elderly folks who send them something won't be someone you can just email or text.