}:) my partner has shared custody of her 5 year old daughter with her ex shes a relitivly well behaved child and I have been with my fiance for 9 months now and she(the daughter) and I get on rather well I try to sit back and let my partner be a lead displinarian chipping in where I can and we both beleive in giving a child boundries and giving time out in the corner when she doesnt listen and does.
the problem we are having using last night as a prime example is this:
Last night we sent her to her room to clean it up before bedtime waited five minutes still nothing happening ok so we tell her you have 15 minutes to clean your room or your gong down to the bottom of your rewards ladder and in the corner for 5 minutes (this usually works as well as taking her teddy toys off her which she cant sleep with out ) 20 minutes goes by nothing has been done shes just mucked around (the child knows what we expect)my partner then goes in tells her the conseqnes which is no teddy in bed tonight and 5 mins in the corner she then tells her to go to the corner her daughter (now heres the issue) says no no no my partner then makes it 10 mins in the corner she still gets defiant and wont go she then is picked up and physically put in the corner however she wont put her hands behind he back or put her head facing the wall still defiant so fast forward the defiance toward the punishment continued even when my partner gove her a smack on the bottom which she does not like doing at all btw but was at her wits end by that stage and asks me what should I do?,so i told her to go in supervise her cleaning her room and strait to bed. so she does this slowly but surely. The child has also lost all her teddy toys for a month at this stage. so we put her to bed then low and behold 15 mins later shes still crying, my partner checks on her shes thrown her pillows out of bed, so now the tantrum has set hold, an hour later we went in, her hole room had been trashed, the foam mattress from her bottom bunk ripped off her bed and her still chucking a mass tanty so by this stage where beyond it, we place her in the bathroom then take everything out of her room that she loves leaving only the basics. this got to her shes now lost them for a month .
The problem we have is she doesnt seem to take our punishments seriously once we took all her toys off her and she laughed and didnt seem to care she just has this really defiant behavior and attitude at times where she talks back to me and her mother and just defies us we are both at our wits end with what to do. my partner also does not know if her ex disciplines her as he is hopeless to communicate with on parenting issues and would only get snarky about it she has tried communicating with him in the past on similar matters and he does nothing and gets her no where.