Anyone else???
Does anyone else feel that the skids' BM and BF put together don't make one logical human being???
I seriously have felt that my DH and my skids' BM, put together, are just plain dumb. Maybe that's why their marriage didn't work to begin with?
Anyway, ss7 has been diagnosed w/ Autism. I have been the only one of both of his parents to take him to all of his dr. appointments. On top of it, sd9 is terrified to speak to her BM in fear of being slapped when discussing anything, and my DH is just oblivious to everything but ESPN! Seriously, I feel men are just oblivious to anything besides themselves (and I just speak from the men I've known, not meaning to step on toes to those who are in tune)!.
Does anyone else have this problem? The longer I am w/ DH, the more I realize that him and his ex may as well have stayed together. I feel as if I am the one trying to make things work, and mind you, his ex refuses to speak to him and calls me for everything. I hate her and DH knows this but still refuses to step up. I am just truly beginning to be annoyed and am to the point where I am saying "they're not my kids, so you deal w/ it." as bad as it sounds, this is where I'm headed!
OH yeah I feel that all the
OH yeah I feel that all the time. They both think they are WONDERFUL parents; but only GG (biodad) can denigrate the Behemoth (BM). If I say the slightest thing negative about the Behemoth, he immediately defends her (unjustifiably). And it's been eight years since they split up!!
In all honesty, they both should be sterilzed as they tend to give the children adult spousal status, i.e., view them as their confidants (which is downright abusive to children).
On one hand, they view their children as denfenseless, helpless, innocent and pure-as-the-wind-driven snow INFANTS no matter HOW old and manipulative they get, and on the other hand, as their "best buddies and adult spousal status confidants." A recipe for DiSaStEr!!
I am a mean ol' traditional parent who was a true single parent (divorced twice) yet managed to raise two respectful, decent children to adulthood without alienating them from their fathers and without any CS! If ANYONE had an "excuse" to PAS out their children, it would be ME! Yet the Behemoth receives MASSIVE CS, gets no trouble from GG, (GG does whatever the Behemoth and her mom the Wookie say) yet she still is on a scorched earth campaign as regards PAS.
I think what the deal with
I think what the deal with these guys is that they are in denial because they don't know how to cope with the mess they have created and that makes them blind to the truth but when someone from the outside looking in tells them the way it is they don't want to hear it because the more they hear it the closer they come to actually having to face reality. I know my DH is in denial...there is no way that anyone could turn a blind eye to the things that go on with his daughter and BM.
My DH thinks that being a good dad is being too affectionate...buying whatever she wants...and letting her go and do as she pleases so she won't be bored. He says he helps BM out (who doesn't have custody and hardly ever sees her daughter)so that she won't get mad and try to take his daughter away.
I wish I was a good manipulator like SD11 and BM who could manipulate him into seeing the truth but then I wouldn't be me... :?
LOL I like your comment "the
LOL I like your comment "the only thing these biodads should feel guilty about is the fact they didn't wear a condom." I'm going to tell my husband that!
I feel your pain, I really do! Just doesn't make sense to me how two senseless adults feel they make one worth a damn parent. Pssh. I have a 3 year old w/ my current husband and he's just as oblivious to our son's care as he is his own two. It drives me freakin' nuts. And his ex is about as ghetto and dirty as the next Mexican. (and i'm mexican so I can say this!) She's just disgusting and passes her traits over to the kids. I just don't understand some parents.
I am from a divorced family and my brother and I never lost our manners (though I will admit we, or I, for that matter, was a pain in the rear at most times!). Someone needs to slap some sense into them and it may be me!
You're singing my song!! DH
You're singing my song!!
DH isn't DUMB - but he's completely and utterly oblivious to everything that he's not currently interested in. He ignores bad behavior or just plain doesn't notice it.
I first saw this when he begged me to get a dog. We got a dog, he put absolutely NO effort into training the dog. Within six months, he wanted to get rid of the dog because (wait for it) it was Too Much Work. Ditto for the second one.
Thank GOD I didn't have kids with him! Every once in a while I'll get nudged by my biological clock, but then I realize I would be 100% responsible for EVERYTHING, and I thank my lucky stars he got snipped!
He's a wonderful husband, and actually a pretty good father for the fun stuff and occasional teaching moments, but day to day? No way. It's a good thing the teenager loves me, AND we're long distance NCPs, otherwise our marriage would NEVER have lasted. I can handle being the "evil SM" to a kid who loves me, I could handle being resented for a couple weeks at a time (back before she accepted me) but I wouldn't be able to handle EOWE if the skid were like most of the skids here.
" I am just truly beginning
" I am just truly beginning to be annoyed and am to the point where I am saying "they're not my kids, so you deal w/ it." as bad as it sounds, this is where I'm headed!"
Its not bad, its logical. Why should you be doing all the work to take care of the medical needs of a child with special needs, when the parents are not lifting a finger?