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Are we wrong not to like each others step kids??

Harvard's picture

Hi, I have been married for three years now. My wife has a daughter who when we started was only 15. She is your typical teenager who lies and cheats and tries to get away with stuff via manipulation. Over these past 3 years I really can't say I like who she is very much as a person and today she feels the same way about me.

Likewise my wife over the past 3 years also no longer likes who my kids are for similiar reasons. My bio kids are 15 and 16 and live with us, her daughter is 18 and away at college.

All 3 kids in my opinion are good kids and typical teenagers yet we just don't respect each others step kids. Has anyone else felt this way and are we wrong to feel this way?? Need some advise...thanks

Totalybogus's picture

My H and I are the same way. Teens are hard to like even when they're your own. LOL! Its much harder to like someone else's kids when they hit that age. Don't feel bad. You are not alone. As long as you both treat each other's kids well you don't necessarily have to like them.

Harvard's picture

I'm glad to hear that...what is wierd is I am proud of her for going to college. I even told her that when still she cleary hates my gutts I am stil able to seperate not liking someone with acknowledging their accomplishments and when they do good in their life I make it known. ITs all very complicated but hopefully we will make it past this. Its just hard like in the house and everyone keeps to themselves and their is no unity between us. The feeling really sucks.

Totalybogus's picture

Keep your eye on the prize. This too shall pass. Her daughter is not in the house often and yours will soon be going out on their own as well. At the end of the day, it will just be the two of you.