You are here

SD playing games?

20YearsAsAStep-Mom's picture

Sd that caused a lot trouble has emailed me twice about her kids game schedules etc. nothing major. I would merely acknowledge and say thanks, that's it.

Now she sent me a pic of her son , DH gson, saying he won the champion games, his team. I said congrats and that's all. I didn't bother to say anything to DH as I don't want to bring her up in ANY conversation. I am sure she expects me to tell DH and then Dh should call and go all goo goo ga ga over it.

Why should I be the go between? if SD wants her dad to know about her kids she should call him herself and ask if I can download the picture for him. DH does not have a cell phone nor does he use the computer at all.

what do you think? an I wrong for not bothering with this?

Jsmom's picture

Your response should be, that is great, please be sure and call your dad to tell him and hang up...

clydella's picture

I don't blame you at all, you are not her messenger. But if you don't tell him, will she use it against you later? Will she say I told 20Years, I guess she didn't think it was important enough to tell you. Is she setting you up?

sandye21's picture

I agree - send her a message that asks her to contact DH so he can get messages first hand. Then next time she emails anything then whines to Daddy, say, "It must have been lost in cyberspace." Or 'accidentally' block her. LOL It sounds as if she is trying to goad you into playing games again. You do not owe it to either SD or DH to act as 'secretary' for them.

hereiam's picture

Did she even ask you to show the pic to your DH?

I wouldn't even respond to her. If she wants your DH to ga ga over the gson, she can contact him directly.

20YearsAsAStep-Mom's picture

she didn't ask me to show DH.... and I do feel like I am being set up. she keeps trying to make me responsible for keeping her dad in the loop on his gkids.

I always get a bad feeling when she does stuff like this. trying to get the drama triangle started again, with her being the victim and me the big bad persecutor.

sandye21's picture

It DOES seem like she is setting you up. I'd reply to her email, with a copy to your 'sent' folder, "SD, Please contact your Dad personally. I'm sure he'd love to see these photos for himself." Give DH a copy of her email and your response. This way she will not be able suck you in, you can remain detached, and she won't be able to whine to Daddy. If she continues to email you, block her. Do you really care if you have a relationship with her anyway?

twopines's picture

No you're not wrong. The mail still works. She can print pics and mail them. I personally would ignore it all. I couldn't care less if skid tried to use it against me.

20YearsAsAStep-Mom's picture

not trying to keep secrets really. just don't want to talk about her. She didn't say , oh and tell dad too! I just feel real uncomfortable with all this. I don't want to think about her much less remember an unspoken message .

Maybe I am reading into it too much. eh I will just forget I even got it. Was a text though this time not email.

NoraAstepmom's picture

20 Years...

I would do what smom101 said. When my husbands adult kids want money I text them back and say call your dad. Funny thing is my husband doesn't want me hanging out with one of his daughters drugs, stealing, lying basic con artist. When we did hook up I feel like she was up to something trying to get back in a relationship with her dad it isn't because she wants one with me. But he will always ask what did she say I told him and he says lets not talk about it because its going to cause problems with us. Its like hellooooooooooo he wants to no and if I don't tell him he said im keeping things from him. My husband has to be the worst defender of all time when it comes to his adult kids.

Unfreakingreal's picture

Well you already responded so she knows you saw the emails. I'd forward the emails to DH and if it ever comes up, you have proof you sent them to him.
Leave it at that.

Towanda's picture

I just don't get these adult SD's. They treat you like crap. Profess their great dislike for you and then they just think they can come waltzing back into your life like nothing happened!
I am as creeped out as you right now. You get your heart all closed up so they can't hurt you and then they do things like this!

Freshstart's picture

Isn't it incredible that they manage to do these things? You'll be going along happily and then some new thing comes up putting you in some sort of tricky position every time. Your SD knows what she is doing. Its a move that 's all. Shame for the boy that his mum has created trouble with his grandad and you. Not your fault and not your problem. Adults have to rebuild their own bridges.

ps she will mention that she sent it so just be prepared for the fall out. That is what this one is about, putting you in a tricky position.

NoraAstepmom's picture

It was lost in cyber space, happens all the time. Why be nice and give it too him. I don't no about anyone else but im tired of bending over kissing there but when they treat me like crap helloooooooooo. what is wrong with this picture