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Friendly Strangers

Newimprvmodel's picture

so the big weekend came and went. Second weekend spent with younger SD in her mid 20’s and her bf, my 22 yr old daughter along with my DH. We stayed at a hotel and immediately it seemed we split along parent line. My daughter stuck to me and his to him.  Restaurants the same. I felt very little connection to SD and got the vibes of coolness. 

We went to a huge football game and stupid me started out by urging DH to sit next to his DD with me sitting next to me DD.  I then was kicking myself for making myself feel like Third wheel. To my DH’s credit, he took the outside seat at halftime and I ended up next to SD. We really did not speak at all other than a few smiles. So at the restaurant later she asked to speak to DH outside for a few minutes. Everything seemed cool, ok. 

My thoughts? My DD and his daughter had zero interest in one another. I think SD and I had very little interactions, she seemed wholly focused on her dad.  Did I want more?  Of course.  She really has no interest in me.  I am just someone she is on her good behavior with and me with her.  Our only connection is sharing him.  

Anyway, I am rambling but I guess I should be very pleased that she is friendly to me albeit we don’t engage in much talk  

 

tog redux's picture

I think that's the best you can hope for, after 10 years of alienation. She's spent all the time hating you and DH and being caught in a loyalty bind with her mother, and it's great that she's even willing to have a relationship with you at all.

Don't take it personally. Just be civil and pleasant.

Harry's picture

Think you should do thing that are team type events.  You, DH, DD, SD are a team against other teams.  Paint ball type of activity.  Even camping,  all working together to set up, ect