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For those with young ones - do you let BM talk to your Bios?

needinginwardpeace's picture

I don't think BM should ever talk to the SM's biochildren. It's not her family, not her place, and generally from my experience most BM's are nuts and don't act appropriately ever. So, I don't want BM talking to, speaking with, conversing about, looking at, coming near or otherwise in the same country as my children.

She has spoken to them before, and was not nice. They are young and are a) unsure of who this woman is (one of my bios keeps asking if BM is a 'witch', and of course I say 'no sweetie, of course she's not a witch - but ha! Leave it to a little kid to notice that about her --- and b) don't understand what her issue is (neither does anyone else).

I did take her up on her little 'talk' with my babies and well, it just didn't go very well for BM. If she does it again, meaning say anything rude or inappropriate around my children I will be doing a lot more than just using email & my voice to tell the slag off.

I think she should go find a hole, crawl into it and hibernate for the next 25 years. Then, when my bios are grown up, she can *try* to talk to them again - which should be interesting given they have me & my DH's personality! ~ likely not in her best interest at that point.

Thanks Smile I needed that.

needinginwardpeace's picture

After this, BM told my husband that the next time she sees me she will "nicely ask how the kids are doing, comment on how much they've grown" - um NO B***H. Stay the F away from my kids!!! That means talking about them too, in front of them or otherwise.

Willow2010's picture

What did she say to your kids?

My BM is not AS nuts as most, so I never had a problem with her around my kids. (Which was not much). It gave her a chance to see how kids are really supposed to act. lol

TASHA1983's picture

Lmbo! Good point Willow...maybe I should let BM be around my kid so she can see what a normal, healthy, fully-functioning, behaved future member of society should LOOK & ACT like.....hahahahaha!!!

needinginwardpeace's picture

oh it was not nice. Trust me. I dealt with her, as I always do. She's so gross. I have no idea why children are starving in Africa and her bubble butt just keeps getting bigger. I could think of many people that deserve more than that woman.

TASHA1983's picture

I agree! We all know that BM doesn't give a fuck about "our" kids, there is always an ulterior motive or reason for them ever dealing with our bios in any way, shape, or form. I trust NO BM that I have ever had the DISpleasure of dealing with! Especially the head case my BF has...she had the nerve to text my BF on 2 seperate occasions that skid doesn't like my son (never said why either)...BOO FUCKING WHOO BITCH...MY kid ain't going anywhere but YOU and YOUR TWAT DROPPING CAN SURELY GO POUND SAND FOR ALL I CARE. Permanently preferably! }:)

HarleyQuinn's picture

def not let them near your kids. You wou;dnt socialise with her and so why is a crazy stranger coming near your kid. I've told DH straight that when we have our babies, if BM even tries to touch them I will chop her nasty STD infected hand off before its even touched them!

BM is NOT family and I wouldnt let crazy down the road touch them so def not BM

StepKidto3Momto3's picture

My neighbor's did that for years. The BM and BF shared one son, then they each remainder and had a second child within weeks of each other. From the time the kids were little, each couple would take a week with all 3 kids so that the other couple could have an adults only vacation. They shared their son 50/50 so they also did family vacations with just the two that were related to them.

The two kids born of the second marriages just tell people they are cousins and call each others parents aunt/uncle because their parents great relationship with their ex just confused people. Lol

Shaman29's picture

That's funny about not wanting BM to even touch your dog!!

I always tell DH how I'd love to slap the shit out of Uberskank(BM), but I don't want to get slut all over my hand.

needinginwardpeace's picture

BM wanted to pet our dog too --- :O :? I backed into the house and said 'um. no thank you' - Wink

Thatonegirl's picture

My dog hates BM. Actually he hates mostly everyone but me, but I think it's hysterical. I think she would draw back a stub if she tried to pet him.

imjustthemaid's picture

When my DD was about 6 or 7 and SD was about 12 I let DD sleep at BM's mothers house with BM, SD, Grandmother and BM's two younger kids. I wasn't thrilled with the idea but they lived around the block from us so I was close by. BM was living with her mother at the time.

I would never let BD4 anywhere near BM. BM's mother babysat for BD when she was about 1. I drove up to the house to pick her up and saw BM carrying her down the street in her arms. I nearly had a heart attack!! Needless to say, I never let the grandmother babysit her again!

Now we have no contact with BM at all and I like it that way!!

MJL2010's picture

Gross. Our BM is not technically "skanky" (I doubt there is any man, woman or animal who would want to engage in any kind of anything with her) but she is an awful person and an awful mother. Filled with poison, anger and spite. Vile. My older kids know that she is an awful person and an awful mother and that if she ever tries to talk to them or hug them they are to be polite but they should not feel compelled to hug her back or speak to her beyond "hello".

My baby has never laid eyes on her, nor she him....and I love that it may stay that way for a very long time. I want one person in this family to be spared the grief!!!

AngeLily's picture

BM 1 I get along with fine. My Bio sons and ss14 actually played a few times when they were really little and I was still with xh. Always have liked her. Bm2 I would probably want to bathe my daughter if she had that biatch speak to her. I have the urge to Lysol the door/sidewalk /driveway when she shows up. (Doesn't help knowing she lived in this effing house either) she doesn't like me and the feeling is mutual. Although, I feel like I need a course of antibiotics if I've had to be around her for any length of time and really don't want my baby around her and hope to all things holy she never says anything to her. Once yss had a teacher conference and I told dh to get a sitter for the baby so she didn't have to be around the woman. Two reasons, so the baby didn't have to be around her and so bm2 couldn't say he wasn't paying attention to yss.

Lalena75's picture

My kids would put BM in her place which has nothing to do with them her mom actually said something to my dd when she was with SO's dd at the store and my dd told her "I can handle her just fine thank you it's part of babysitting being capable of dealing with bad behavior which wasn't a problem till you came along bothering her about who I am wherea her dad her dad should never leave her side, does their mother smother her no neither does her dad."

needinginwardpeace's picture

"I really dislike BM"

don't we all!

BM in our case phoned my husband at the hospital when our children were being born, so that 'she' could 'congratulate him'. WHY THE F**K would my husband want to talk to his TRASHY EX WIFE while I AM IN LABOUR????!!!! He hung up on her.

When we got married she phoned 3 times, which our answering machine picked up. I should have kept them. Priceless.
First, to congratulate us and wish us 'a long and happy marriage'.
Second, 5 minutes later, to freak out about something in the custody agreement, but got confused about the topic
Third, to congratulate my husband again, this time with tears, and she said 'she wanted to make sure he got the congrats'.
----> Uhhhh, regret-much? LMAO!

In mediation, she referred to MY CHILDREN again! Stating to my husband 'you have 2 children that I haven't even met yet!' - and started bawling her eyes out - ? :?

Maybe I should join in on her weirdness - YES! Let's have a big family HOE-DOWN (*literally, exactly what it would be*) and we can ALL sing KUMBAYA while holding hands and marvelling at the splendour of the SUNSET. Then we can get out our paintbrushes (BM thinks she's an 'artist'. No, BM works in an office and can't paint worth sh*t) and paint the sunset together! *sigh.......it must be nice living in LA LA LAND

Maroma1984's picture

I considered letting my BM met my baby girl since it's her daughter's sister, but then she went bat shit crazy and I decided that I'm going to keep her away from my baby as long as possible.

When I got pregnant , she started messaging me on Facebook all the time asking me dumb ass questions that EVERY WOMAN that has had a kid knows. Plus , she's a nurse. She messaged me around 8 weeks if I knew the gender yet. Seriously? Any mom knows you don't know the gender then! She told me she loved me , couldn't wait for 'our' family to grow, offered to babysit, and asked if she could visit in the delivery room. I got so creeped out, I blocked her and my DH talked to her about boundries and how 'our' family just consists of my husband, SD11, my daughter, and me.

sunbeam0901's picture

I used to have no problems with BM being around my bios. We were all getting along well enough that we even invited her to have holiday meals at our house the last couple of years. Theeeeennnnnn I found out she was talking shit about all of us to my IL's, who we have zero contact with for a reason and she knows it. She can get her holiday meals from a fcuking soup kitchen this year.

Redsonya's picture

BM likes to pretend that my DD4 (who was 2 when DH and I got married) doesn't exist. It makes her whining about how she caaaaan't get a full time job with kids at home (two teens) look ridiculous with me pulling in 6 figures and raising a toddler (one with better manners than both her teen boys put together). She has literally demanded that my DH do some errand for SD17 with me sitting right next to him, saying that he doesn't have any kids and she has three. Ummmm...really? We have a toddler together. She doesn't biologically belong to DH, but he is her stepfather and lives with her/helps raise her. I've since used her same logic to defend my decision to keep BM's nephew out of my house. He isn't biologically related to DH, therefore, he doesn't exist. She didn't like that.

DD4 calls her the evil witch too, lol and has even run into the living room frantically to "warn" her siblings (the skids) when the "evil witch" pulled up in our driveway to collect them from visitation. Must be that bright red dollar store dye job and man chin that has DD4 concerned - priceless!

hismineandours's picture

Um, no. Just this past spring my dh actually tried to talk me into letting my ds13 go with ss14 to bm's overnite. Um, no. Told him he'll to the no. It was for ss's bday they were going o some video game place they rent out all night. Ss had no friends to bring. My ds is 13 so not a small child but still, hell no.

When the kids were younger she might say hi to them when she came and picked up ss and that was about it. At some point she got crazy and just talked shit to me while my small children were standing there. Banned her from my property after that.

needinginwardpeace's picture

Hahahaa. This is actually hilarious to me.

Given what she's told her own children, she would probably tell mine that she was a reincarnation of 'Valcore' from the Never-Ending Story and has special powers allowing her to fly to the moon. - yes, she's delusional. REALLY delusional. Like believes she's been romantically involved with actors delusional.

crystalclear's picture

Funny thing is I don't have a problem with BM. Its my SS that I don't wany around. I have had her over for BD2 birthday party a few mths ago. She normally hangs out a little while when she drops him off. I've offered to babysit her BD2 if she needs it. In general I like her its the weirdo kid of hers I don't like. Its not somthing she did he's just creepy! He says I don't want to kiss girls I only want to kiss my dad. I think there is somthing truely wrong with him. They say the eyes are a window to a persons soul. This kids eyes just creep me the F out!