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Is it just me?

LOLA_EG12's picture

Feeling just a little stressed out today. Looking at our expenses and can't help but feel so much resentment towards everything going on. Middle class sucks. We get the shitty end if the spectrum. We make just enough to get by with no help from anything. Paying child support and while ss is in our care over the summer who sends us money to buy clothes, food toys ect? NO ONE! An extra expense over summer and top it off dh still has to hand over child support. Dont pay is for 2 months and its call after call from the cs offices. Dh isn't allowed to continue school full time because that would mean that he's voluntarily choosing not to work and pay cs. But she doesn't work and it's all fine and dandy. We live in a fucked up system. 

Ispofacto's picture

The thing that always chapped my ass was the NCP having to claim the income on taxes, whereas the CP doesn't have to pay tax on the income.  And Child Care expenses are not deductable if you are NCP.

BM got EIC (aka welfare), foodstamps, and energy assistance, while getting thousands per month in CS.


LOLA_EG12's picture

Oh I know. Bm was held in contempt of court because she was filing her taxes and claiming ss ever year when it was supposed to be every other year. Bm couldn't understand why dh should be able to claim him even though she gets her damn cs every damn month. Ncp dont get any kind of help. 

SMto2's picture

Yes, I absolutely hated it that BM in our case got just under $15K per year tax free from us, which was a chunk of about $23K a year of DH's gross income (about 1/3 for quite some time), AND she claimed BOTH SSs on her taxes. Now that CS is over and SSs are both grown, it makes me happy to think that BM no longer getseither CS tax free OR the additional exemptions for SSs! 

Thisisnotus's picture

Oh I agree! My DH could not afford to live on his own.... even with a roommate he’d never make it.  Between a huge CS payment, the 300 per month for the kids health insurance, paying BM half of all kinds of shit and having the kids 50 percent of the time and paying for their expenses during that time....

and he gets killed at tax time as Bm claims them.

 But that was her make pay a hefty price for divorcing her. She makes more money than him also.....but that’s the beauty of lying in court on her part about how much money she makes. He was too afraid to call her on it in fear she would stall the divorce 

LOLA_EG12's picture

Yea i love that too. Bm could get away with working as a " make up artist" and tell the judge it's just a hobby ahe has while promoting it all over social media, but none of that counts because its was unreported income. But God forbid dh get paid under the table. Wouldn't change the cs amount. 

Thisisnotus's picture

They have been divorced for 3 years....I’m sure he could have it modified....but he won’t “rock the boat”. He’s too afraid.

just like BM isn’t trying to get more from him even though he’s had two substantial raises because she knows She would have to bring her real financials to the table which would greatly reduce CS

SMto2's picture

He, too, was afraid to "rock the boat" with BM out of fear of her turning the SSs against him. (Which she did anyway!)  Even after both SSs were in school full-time, his CS was calculated based on BM paying HER MOM $800 a month to watch SSs while BM worked part-time, so her CS was hugely inflated forever. Fortunately, after about 10 years, DH's pay reached a point where what he was paying was what the formula required. However, after oldest SS graduated high school, rather than having CS recalculated, DH again did not want to "rock the boat" and kept paying the same amount he had for 2 kids for only youngest SS for TWO MORE YEARS until SS graduated high school. Really sad to think about what these men go through because they're held hostage and desperate not to do anything that might be used to turn their kids against them.

Harry's picture

He like everyone else should be paying for them. Not having his kids on public assistance because DH wants to live better.  If DH wants to go to school, he can do it at night, like other people who have to work .  Your SO decide to have kids, if therenot enough money, he can find a part time job, a weekend job, to make money.  But he sits on his as* and you are venting about the kids,  you should be venting about Your infected SO