Dh wants noting to do with my two bios (they are the one's at fault though)
I'm a SM to a 12 year old boy, and a biomom to Bs14, Dd14(both from prevoius marriage), and dd4 (with dh). Ss12 was being bullied quiet severly at school last year and tried to take his own life as a result. Fortunately bm found ss before he could do anything, and bm sent ss12 to live with us in order to start afresh (bm dealt with the school. The four boys were expelled)
Ss12 was diagnosed with depression and is taking anti-depressants, he's also been seeing a therapist weekly. For the most part ss12 is just a quiet kid. He doesn't really speak much. He only ever really talks when he's spoken too. I mean he's so quiet that we sometimes forget that he's in the same room. His grades though have always been at the top! He's in the advanced program at school and he's doing great!! Things were getting better for him. He was slowly starting to open up again. Like he would actually start a conversation with us, start smiling regularly, and even laughing . Dh was in tears when heard ss12 laugh- it's such a sweet sight, and he was starting to make friends!
However within the last few months, he slowly started to revert back into his old self. Becoming very quiet, and reserved. Dh caught ss trying to cut his wrists. Ss12 told dh that Bs14 and Dd14 were bully him at school. Them and their friends would pick on ss12. I don't think I've ever seen dh that mad before!! I was furious!! I yelled at the both of them for a good 20 minutes (each). They had to write an apology ESSAY (not a letter, an essay. I'm talking about an introduction, 3 body paragraphs, and a conclusion) to ss12. They lost all of their eletronics for 2 weeks, weren't allowed to go anywhere except to school, work, and the house for a month.
They did apoligze to both ss12 and dh. Ss12 for the post part has been quiet when they walk in the room or he just leaves. I've seen him go into the bathroom and just cry - i'm thinking he's having problems with this. Dh has been treating them differently too. He's not rude to them, he's poliet to them, ash them how there day has been going. He keeps his interactions with them short and sweet. They did ask me if dh was still angry with them (they love dh. There was even talk of dh adopting them). I did ask dh how he was treating them, and he said that he does forgive them, but he will NEVER forget it. Dh said that seeing ss12 in that much pain really got him and the has to face those reasons on the daily basis, and said that he doesn't consider them his kids anymore. That since walking in on ss12 trying to cut his wrists, the only thinks of them as his stepkids and his only two real kids are ss12 and dd4. I agreed that want they did is pretty horrific, but now the want to make amends. Dh said that he doesn't feel the same way about them anymore, and that his interactions will them will always be poliet.He will always be civil and treat them with respect (which he's doing), but they are not his kids, they're my kids.
I feel like I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place.