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The Karma Bus is a-comin'...

Synaesthete's picture

and I'm kind of stoked.

So while browsing FB this afternoon I noticed BM has a new boyfriend. I was intrigued, because the kids are with FH right now and they haven't mentioned anything about it. We don't ask or drill them for information on her, but they do have a tendency to chit chat a lot about what's going on and with her previous boyfriend they talked about casually him a lot when visiting us.

I clicked on his profile which isn't private and there are a couple things that are going to be interesting. First of all, her previous boyfriend had never been married and had no children of his own - new boyfriend not only has a daughter but an ex-wife who it looks like he only split from this year.

Now, I don't want to start a discussion about how long after a divorce should people begin to date, does it matter if it's not finalized on paper yet, blah blah blah because that's a can of worms but I will say that I began seeing FH before their paperwork was finalized. They were living separately long before that, but the filing delay was due to a combination of a slack-ass lawyer as well as her moving circumstances and waiting periods after filing before they'll process it. The relationship was long over when we began seeing each other and she knew and admitted that I had nothing to do with their divorce, but her friends *loved* jumping on and attacking me because FH's paperwork wasn't finished yet. I was called a lot of names and had a lot of cruel messages sent to me.

It's interesting because now her boyfriend likely doesn't have his finalized papers. FH and I know from experience that waiting on a final decree doesn't necessarily mean any foul play, but I have to admit that I would get a lot of enjoyment out of seeing people get on her case about the very thing she spurred her friends on doing to me and FH.

I'm also interested to see how she operates when she has to take a back seat to a child that isn't hers, play the stepmother role and deal with a BM of her own. BM is very opinionated when it comes to parenting and has trouble keeping her mouth shut when talking to people who disagree with her. She's not ballsy enough to say anything aggressive or be straightforward, but I can see her enforcing her own opinions and methods on the kid whether or not her mother agrees or making passive aggressive comments about how inferior the mother's parenting style is.

Either way, it looks like drama from all sides and I'm more interested than I should be in watching it all unfold.

The karma train is roaring down the tracks right about now.

Synaesthete's picture

LOL That would be too funny, but very fitting and definitely a bit of a karma train.

Maybe your BM will end up with someone with children and a PITA ex-wife - after all, nowadays, it's tougher to find someone without children, and from what I've read from your posts I can't think of any man, especially one with no baggage who can move pretty freely between relationships should he choose, who would stick around with her for too long.

I don't even wish bad things on our BM and the new boyfriend. I don't even hope they break up - I hope they stick it out and move in and she can deal with what we've had to deal with every single day, just to give her some perspective and maybe take her down a couple pegs so she stops thinking she's faultless. -shrug- I don't want her to suffer, I just want a little karmic retribution. Wink

Mary Jane2's picture

Same thing happened with my skids BM.

She went through about 5 guys before she suck with the one she now has and I have to say it's the best thing that has happened.

The 5 previous guys same as your BM, no ex wife, no children etc.. therefore no drama for her, NOW the BM has 2 skids and an EVIL ex wife so EVIL that she runs rings around my skids BM.

Ever since BM has been dealing with her new blended family and became an SM she has done a total 360 with me. Don't get me wrong we are not best friends but I can text or call her and visa versa if something needs to be discussed about the kids. It's a workable situation now.

She has said to my BF that she can't believe I have stayed this long considering how she treated me for the first 4 years and how hard it is to be an SM.
My BF just laughs at her and says serves you right for treating Mary Jane like shit all those years.

Karma is a BITCH }:)

I hope it works out for you just as much as it did for me.

Synaesthete's picture

Wow! Well I'm glad things worked out well in that way for you guys, then. Our BM has never been *awful* with us - she's too passive-aggressive to really get in our faces or be obnoxious about something, and even if she's mad about something she'll rant to her friends about it instead of saying anything to us (which is fine, sometimes, because she's mad about nothing but there are times she really should stop being phony and just let us know if something is seriously getting under her skin - we aren't stubborn and trying to piss her off and if it were something we didn't realize we were doing that we could alter to help things be less tense, we'd likely do it) and quite frankly, she loves the kids but likes her little break from them too much to really sabotage the visitation in any way.

I just don't like some of the lies she's put out there or that she's allowed to remain out there even if she knows they aren't true. A little taste of people getting on her case about the same things she sat back and let people attack FH and I for would be satisfying.