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No Car, No Phone = No Visitation

Crazy_in_Ohio's picture

Last week, Horshead said texted she would no longer have a phone. No longer have texts and that SO could "f*ck off". After that there was no more communication. He didn't call, he didn't text. She always texts him first with her demands and if he doesn't acquiesce immediately, she says he's playing games and tells him to stop texting her. She's a very confused person.

CO says that on Father's Day, she is to bring them to his house @ 9am. He is to have them home @ 7pm. If the holiday falls on a normal visitation weekend, then obviously it's already

9pm Saturday Night - Horsehead sends texts "MAYBE YOU CAN PICK SON & DAUGHTER UP TOMORROW? I CAN'T BRING THEM. YOU WASTED MY MINUTES ON MY PHONE PLAYING TEXT GAMES SO I HAVE TO RELY ON THIS UNTIL I CAN BUY MINUTES. YOU CALL MY PHONE ASKING TO SPEAK TO BOTH KIDS SO YOU CAN ASK SON TO SPEAK TO DAUGHTER UNTIL HER PHONE IS FIXED OR REPLACED. I SAW THE MISSED CALL ON HER PHONE AND ASKED HER TO CALL YOU" (I thought her phone was broken? So confused"

SO texted her back " I don't know what you're talking about in regards to text games. However, I can't pick them up in the morning. Crazy will be gone with her father and my car is currently in the shop. I cannot get a car until Crazy gets home to let me borrow hers. Please find an alternate way of getting them here."

Horsehead texts back "THERE'S NO GAMES EXCEPT THE ONES YOU PLAY ALONG WITH WHATEVER CRAP YOU MAKE UP IN YOUR HEAD I CANNOT BRING THEM TOMORROW I AM TAPPED OUT I ASKED YOU TO HELP AND YOU IGNORE AND REFUSE AS USUAL. THEMEPARK COST ME 100 BOUGHT THEM PRACTICE ITEMS AND CLEATS DID PHYSICALS FOR BOTH JUST TOOK CARE OF CAMP TOO MY CAR IS ON EMPTY BECUASE I TAKE SON TO AND FROM PRACTICE THREE TIMES A WEEK I DO ALL I CAN AND YOU REFUSE TO HELP. MAYBE IF YOU PROVIDED MEDICAL INSURANCE LIKE YOU ARE SUPPOSED TOO I WOULD HAVE 120 MORE EACH MONTH YOU DIDN'T BRING THEM HOME ON MOTHERS DAY EITHER REMEMBER? IT ISN'T AGAINST ANY LAW TO NOT HAVE A PHONE OR A CAR YOU ARE THE ONE THAT WANTS ME TRAPPED HERE. REMEMBER THAT"

SO he texed her back "I do provide medical insurance for them directly to the state as I'm required, which would not give you any more money. You are receiving state aid, whihc is why you get less money. You could get a job. You choose not to. Secondly, you had them all weekend on Mothers Day weekend, should I have picked them up, drove them out of the cul-de-sac and then brought them back? that makes no sense. Third, I give you 50% of my income. I don't have anymore to give you. If we were together, we might not choose to allow them to play in such high monetary sports, but I don't have any say in the matter so that's on you. And while there is no law that you have to have a phone or a car, we do have a court order that you are to bring them - whether you pay for a taxi, borrow a car, or whatever - that's your part of the deal. You can't text me 12 hours prior to them supposed to be here and get mad when I say I can't get them."

He sent another text that said "I do not want you or our kids to be trapped ever. However, you're not going to move 6 hours away with your history of being unreliable. The court told you that. Not me; I just don't disagree with it. Please bring them and I will give you $10 for gas money."

Then she called and I really though that she was going to have a coronary. Not sure where she got the minutes, but I guess she shit them out of her ass. End Result - he can again F*ck off.

The kids called before I left Sunday morning, not to wish him a happy father's day but to find out when I was leaving and if I really was using my car and where my other one was. Horsehead told them that I should once again step up to the plate and that it's more important for them to see their father, than for me to see mine. F*ck her. I have two cars, one I was using, the other was getting work done and I wouldn't get it back til Monday. However, she doesn't have claim to my shit.

I went and hit some golf balls with my dad, came back. no kids. He spent the day mowing the lawn, painting some stuff, putting up miniblinds, etc.

I feel awful. I would have given him my car and asked my dad to pick me up, if he would have asked. But he would'nt and didn't and I don't offer. I wish he'd handle it better. But I wish she wasn't such a a$$hole.

Her last text yesterday was "I DON'T HAVE A CAR. I WILL TURN THIS PHONE OFF. YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY KIDS AGAIN. YOU ARE A DRUNK. I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT WHEN I MET YOU IN A BAR" ?!??!?!

Comments

Crazy_in_Ohio's picture

I inferred that as well, but only Horsehead understands what she is saying. The rest of the human race can not possibly understand her as we are all inferior and only have 80 IQs.

Kilgore SMom's picture

He is wasting way to much energy going back and forth with her. The best response to stupidity is not response. That is how we can control a situation don't response. This kind of behavior from her will never stop until he quits responding.

Crazy_in_Ohio's picture

I full agree. I try really hard to get him to stop replying. I wish he'd handle things better; but I think he gets worn down by not replying and feels like he needs to defend himself - which I get, but it just feeds the troll!

Crazy_in_Ohio's picture

I told him this morning that he should file contempt on her before she files on him which she generally does when she doesn't get her way. He gets very anxious about the court and while I can't blame him, I told him he needs to grow a set and get it done. Smile

Crazy_in_Ohio's picture

Agree with all your statements about Ohio - I know the rules very well Smile

I don't think I'm standoffish - more like hands-offish.

I will generally fill out or file all of his papers when he's asked.

However, I won't take the lead for him. We're not married; we don't live together and quite frankly - if he wants things to change, I can talk til I'm blue in the face but you know, when he's at work does his boss do it all for him or does he do his own work? I always retierate that I'm here for him and when he asks, I'm there to help. If he sits back and goes all "poor me", I'm not going to beg him to stand up for himself. But if he says "Will you help me stand up for myself and my kids?" Then I'm right there, doing all I can.

He didn't ask to use my car because he wanted to make his point. He gets pissed when his kid or Horsehead assume I'm there to pick up the slack. And I'm not, so he feels like he had to protect me and also figure out how to get it right. I don't know if that makes sense. So his point was made but at what cost? His son is mad, he's pissed, his daughter is already minHorshead and he spent most of the morning slamming shit around my house. He could have made his point AND still have had time with his kids. I've never denied him anything when he asks and I know how to get things done. That's what makes me sad. He could have made his point and handled it better.

Drac0's picture

I love your SO's responses.

Oh how quick these BM's are to forget the CO when it is no longer convenient for them isn't it?

Crazy_in_Ohio's picture

That's a universal truth. It's almost always more convenient to forget or misplace the truth when you want to shut someone down or martyr yourself!