Happy Birthday "wishes" from skids? Stories welcome!
I just had a milestone birthday ending in a zero. Had a wonderful day celebrating with friends and family and ending with a fun-filled dinner. It truly was a birthday to remember. I got cards in the mail, flowers delivered at home - the whole nine yards. I am so thankful and I think celebrations like this show who really cares about you.
I've been slowly but surely disengaging from SD for quite awhile now. The one exception is her birthday when I text her birthday greetings - and that's all. I only text her because that is all she has done for me for several years now. I figured I was only going to expend the same energy that she was doing with me which was a text.
She doesn't do much more for my SO's (her father's) birthday either, just a phone call. It is the one time during the entire year that she initiates a call to him - on his birthday. I know he waits for it and acts like an addict with a drug when his phone rings and it's her. She does not text him on a regular basis either. He often goes months without hearing from her at all.
The day AFTER my birthday I was busy running around and didn't have my phone on me all the time. At one point in the afternoon I noticed a voicemail. It was from SD saying "Sorry I missed your birthday. Please give ME a call." Needless to say, I did not call her back and I did not mention it to my SO either. The last thing I wanted to do was listen to some bull story from her about how she forgot my birthday and get assurances that she was still a wonderful person. Not happening. Disengaged.
Now she has sent my SO a text asking HIM if I got her voicemail. He asked me if I had gotten a VM from her and I said yes. I told him that she left a VM for me the day AFTER my birthday, asking me to call HER. I told him I did not call her back. He seemed a bit upset and walked away. Later on I asked him what was upsetting him because I started to think he might be upset with me. He said he was disappointed in her and her lack of effort. I told him that I didn't feel it was my responsibility to call her back to get birthday wishes so I didn't do it. I said she could have just done her usual and sent me a text for my birthday, which she didn't do either. He again expressed his disappointment and that was the end of the discussion.
I guess SD expected me to behave like her father and be thrilled because she took time out to actually call me. And when I didn't jump on the SD-worship bandwagon and immediately call her back, it must have stuck in her craw. I find it interesting that she texted her father asking if I got her voicemail - I see right through that little move. She was trying to show him that she "tried" and earn a few Brownie points for herself. If she was truly interested if I got her message, she could have tried calling ME again or texting ME.
The irony in this whole story is that I saw a post and photo on FB where SD and her husband (SIL) just threw a big surprise birthday dinner at a restaurant for his father with "lots of friends and family." SIL's father is an ex-felon with a decades-long rap sheet including domestic violence. SIL and his family have no money, so SD is most probably the one who picked up the tab for the dinner. SD has known her husband for a grand total of less than 2 years so this was quite a bash she planned and put on for her FIL's birthday. I didn't tell my SO about this as I know it would be devastating for him to hear.
Yet her own father gets a phone call. And I've been around for half her life and I get a message to call her back.
This is just a vent more than anything else. I am sure many of you have plenty of examples of how skids try and cover their tracks to maintain their reputations with daddy (or mommy) when they have failed at the basics normal relationships require.
Anyone else have some legendary birthday shenanigans stories they'd like to tell? How you were dissed or ignored? What was the most ridiculous or insulting gift you've received? Do share...