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It is a miscarriage

corgimom's picture

See previous blog post.

Doctor called this morning and said my hormone levels from the blood test on Wednesday were much higher than she expected. She wanted me to come see her after I got blood drawn again today so she could try to look again. After spending about ten minutes looking around my uterus, she still saw no baby. She said she would wait till my blood results came back and if they went up, she would send me to the big ultrasound clinic to see if they could find it. Well, the lab results came back and my hormones went down from 47k to 41k. So she told me I can either wait for the miscarriage to happen naturally, take the pill that stimulates it, or go in for the D&C surgery. I feel really empty. I don't know what to do.

She gave me a prescription for Zoloft since I've already been dealing with depression issues for the past few weeks. I don't know if I will take them yet or not, but I guess I'll see how I feel. I don't know if I want to wait it out or just get it over with.

Comments

marissamae88's picture

I am soooo sorry I cannot imagine how you are feeling. Mourn your loss and I hope you have tons of love around you this weekend. Again I am so sorry.

stormabruin's picture

Prayers & hugs to you sweetie. I'm so sorry. I wish there was more we could do to help you through this. Sad

skylarksms's picture

I am so sorry to hear that. I wished I could do something to help. {{{HUGS}}}

I would start taking the Zoloft immediately because it takes a while before it becomes effective.

caregiver1127's picture

Corgimom - so sorry - I too went through this with my first pregnancy with DH - I would suggest that if you have good insurance do the D&C - my baby had actually stopped growing after week 5 but I did not start bleeding until week 12 - I had gone to my Dr at week 10 and we could not find the heartbeat but he said not to worry but I did worry because I am a nurse and I know at 6 weeks the heart develops but since I did not bleed and my stomach was still growing I thought okay maybe he is right and I don't have to worry and then I started bleeding week 12 and when they did the ultrasound it was just a mass of cells - I did have them test the mass and it was trisomy 18 which many many many women have and the baby miscarries in the first 5 - 6 weeks and think it is their period. When I got pregnant the second time I went for an ultrasound at 5 weeks because I was 38 and older. The day I went for that ultrasound and could see the look on technicians face was horrible and he could not tell me anything but I knew by his face that it was not good at all and luckily DH came to the GYN-OB's office and the doctor told us together.

So make sure that you take time for you this weekend and hopefully you won't have the skids and you and DH can mourn. You are in my prayers.

Still Have Hope's picture

So sorry. This happened to me, my first pregnancy. Rest and take care of yourself.

z3girl's picture

I am so sorry for your loss. When my IVF failed, it was recommended I stock up on ice cream and tissues. Hardly adequate for the overwhelming feeling of loss and bitterness toward everyone with children (hint, that's you DH!). The only way I got over it was by getting pregnant a couple months later. And even now...until I hold my living, breathing, healthy baby in my arms, I'm a nervous wreck. I wish you the chance to move on from this. But nothing can take away the hell of right now. Sad

CaptainD's picture

I would rec letting it happen naturally. D&c can cause damage down there. How far along were you?

I'm so sorry Sad

TheBrightSide's picture

Honey..i went through 2 miscarriages in 09. I had a D&C for the first one...then went through through the next few months feeling like it was all a big mistake and that the baby was still alive...

The second time I got pregnant, I vowed i wouldn't have the D&C if something went wrong..so I miscarried in my shower and it was physically painful and soul wrecking.

I was an emotional mess both times, but the D&C was much less painful physically.

I'm also not going to tell you..."oh, don't you worry, keep trying, I did and now have a wonderful new baby"...because to me, it belittles what you are going through NOW and the loss of your baby NOW. When people said that to me, I felt like face punching them because i had LOST MY BABY and they were glowing about their babies.

Take care of yourself. Love yourself. I pray you have a supportive husband. He won't feel this loss like you do, so be easy on him.

Feel free to PM me.

stormabruin's picture

Wow. I don't think ANYONE intended to offend or brag about their babies, & I don't see where encouraging someone to look to a positive future belittles the pain she's feeling now. We've all posted because we want to show support. When I am experiencing something painful, it helps me to know that others have experienced it & have gotten through it with a postivie outcome.

CaptainD's picture

I agree. When I had my miscarriage, I appreciated all the words of comfort and hope for the future (many of which I received on THIS website)

StillSearching's picture

I am so sorry for your loss! My best friend had two miscarriages and it was horrible to see her in such emotional pain. I hope you have supportive people to help you.

((((HUGS)))))

Butterflykissesandlicks's picture

I'm so so sorry. I have been "absent" for quite some length of time here on ST but jumped in today to check on everyone.

I have had a total of two miscarriages in one year and feel your pain. STBXH "was" supportive but did not think clearly, as in having a BDay party the week I lost my first...

TAKE the meds and don't worry about getting pregnant again, right away. You need to take care of YOU first of all.

FYI- I chose to have natural miscarriages at HOME. The ER was morbid and cold to me. *

corgimom's picture

Thank you everyone for your support and kind words. I don't know what I am going to do still. I guess I'm still waiting for it to sink in. thanks again for the hugs.

unbelieveable's picture

ugh ; ( sometimes I think our stress is the biggest cause of these situations ; ( Hugs to you.