Something is definitely up with BM
We have had SD11 since Tuesday, which is 3 days longer than we were supposed to have her. Normally, after 2 days of not seeing her, BM is all over SD, "Mommy missed you so much!" "I was so lonely without you!" Gag me with a spoon! Anyways, Thursday she asked us to keep her because she wasn't feeling well. Friday, it was can SD11 come to your house and I can pick her up later, unless you want her. SD11 ended up staying the night. Saturday, I don't know that we heard from her much yesterday, but SD11 had a birthday party/sleepover.
Anyways, GUBM texts DH this morning and he asks her what time she will be there. She texts him back, "In a bit. We just got out of the shower." I'm wondering about the "We" part of that statement. And I was suspicious Friday, I asked him specifically, is she still sick or is there something more to the story. This is how she "tells" him things, like when she "told" him she was pregnant with the new baby, she asked him to pick up the "stuff" in her bathroom when he and SD11 stopped by while she was at work to get volleyball stuff. She didn't want SD11 to see the "stuff" laying on the sink in the bathroom. She knew they were coming BEFORE she left for work, they had texted about SD11 needing her volleyball bag about an hour before she left. The "stuff" was 3 positive pregnancy tests. He was so grossed out! He and I agreed, she did it on purpose.
Anyways, for 3 years GUBM and BF (whom we actually like), have been on again off again so much that even SD11 said this summer during an On time, "We'll see how long it lasts, I give it 3 weeks." I just know GUBM and I know she said "We" on purpose. With not wanting SD11 around this week, I bet she is back together with BF. OR she was referring to her and the baby. Which, to me, even that is a little weird, referring to her and the baby as "We". But the real kicker is not really wanting SD11 back to her house.
What do you guys think?
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Comments
My DH's BM does the same
My DH's BM does the same exact thing when we has a guy over. I swear she plays round-robin with men when we have the kids.
I don't think it is a new
I don't think it is a new guy, although she has been with A LOT of guys (and one girl) since DH. I think it is baby daddy, the on again/off again BF. The I'm going to get knocked up by you BF so that you will commit to me! Wow, that story sounds very familiar, oh wait that's what she did to my DH! She wanted a baby and a guy to take care of her and her Daddy Issues. Poor DH was the poor schmuck that got blindsided by the oops! I told you I was on birth control but I have forgotten to take it in two weeks! Guess what! You're going to be a Daddy!
The back and forth between
The back and forth between our house and GUBM's house is pretty fluid. DH likes it that way and it works out for the most part, most of the time, although there has been an occasional hiccup when GUBM lets her crazy show. And that's his kid, I'm not going to say No you can't hang out with your daughter because we should punish GUBM, to me that is sinking to her level. He let them move over an hour away years ago and now that they are back, he is grateful he nor I have to make that drive anymore and he gets to spend more time with her. And there have been times when he and I had plans, like our honeymoon and our upcoming trip to Vegas, that she kept SD and didn't say a word about it other than to complain we were spending money on ourselves rather than her half of SD's volleyball fees.
I don't see it as free babysitting services, I see it as time he gets to spend with his daughter. He and I have plenty of time with just the two of us. Sometimes I do get irritated when she shows up, mainly by her attitude or laziness, but I realize it is only a few days a week and I actually do care about my SD and most of the time enjoy spending time with her.
I would actually love it if
I would actually love it if they went by the CO. I think they keep it fluid and ever changing based on what is easiest for them, not her. Sometimes she doesn't even know until that evening whose house she will be staying at! Will she need to take her backpack and school stuff? What clothes will she need? Is her volleyball stuff at BM's house or ours? It drives me insane, but she just goes with the flow. But commonly even if she knows where she will be and what she needs she leaves something she needs at the other house and then someone has to drive over. I think she needs some structure and routine in her life. But what do I know, I'm just the SM right?
Most of the time, BM and DH are able to work it out, the "I need her for this." or "We are having a family get together on this day." that kind of thing. The only time it becomes a problem is when BM lets her psycho show and refuses him ANY time because she got mad at him for something. Last time I think it lasted for a week. There was one time before I came along, I think it lasted 3 weeks.