Spin Off on Skids Eating Habits--Dining Out with Peccaries
I should preface by saying that when I was young, fast food was, well just not there. There were mostly diners and formal sit down restaurants other than the lunch counter at Woolworths. We were taught early on about table manners, how to hold your cutlery, napkin on lap, elbows off the table, chewing with your mouth closed, no talking and chewing at the same time, how to say "no thank you I don't care for this or that" instead of "YUCKKK!!!!" not to take more food than you can eat, no bodily noises at the table, only polite quiet conversation when mouth is not full.
This is the way I taught my bios as well. That all went out the window when I met Chef. They would eat with their hands, burp, fart, spew crumbs by laughing and talking with their mouths full, demand Chef cut up their food, wipe their mouth with their sleeve often then wiping it on the wall.
The last time I ate out with one of Chef's ferals was at "Friendly's" with the Houseshitter only. That was the last straw. The scene in "A Christmas Story" where Randy eats like a little piggy comes leaping to mind. The constant demand to go to the washrooms with Chef accompanying him (at almost 7) seemed excessive to me. In the years past, there were several incidents at Applebees:
1. YSS snatching newspaper I was reading from my hands (I snatched it back and gave him a look that could kill)
2. Lying down in the middle of the corridor causing wait staff to have to walk over the bodies
3. Hanging onto any rail in site and swinging from said rail
4. Sticking straws up their noses and trying to snort chocolate milk that way
5. Standing up on the table, crouching down under the table by sliding down
6. Looking behind us and staring at other patrons while they eat then commenting "YUCK!" etc
7. Bouncing around in their seats
8. Spewing partially chewed food whilst screaming with ear piercing laughter
9. Ordering from the adult menu then wasting the food yet getting dessert regardless
10. Loud burping and farting on purpose
Most patrons would look on with horror anytime we entered a restaurant. Fortunately I bear no resemblance to the peccaries so I could safely mouth "they're not mine" and sometimes I would get a look of understanding/knowing by a particular female patron who may have had skids of her own. We would often get hate stares (well deserved) by the patrons which I totally blame on Chef's guilty/disney dadding and the Gir's unending permissiveness which continues to this day (allowing stb 17 Houseshitter to have a GF in his room alone with the door shut--a no no in my day and age).