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Father's Day ..... Grrrr !!!

Sweetnothings's picture

So, no cards from the skids, no surprise there, I knew they wouldn't bother. DH and I go out early for a lovely Breakfast and then a planned excursion in the fresh air.

At Breakfast, he mentions about flying the younger skid out in one breath, and then about how we must start seriously saving, adding more to our pensions, but spending a couple of thousand on the younger skid's holiday is a okay ??? Hmmmm....... He says we will have to be careful, okay, I know there is a recession, but DH only gets the minimum amount of holiday per year and we have already used almost two weeks on skids, and he promised me a week away too, guess that's not happening now.

We get back from our day out there is a two line memail from sd21, saying HE can ring HER if HE LIKES !!! How lucky for him !!! Permission to ring her on Father's Day !!! No card, of course...

STRAIGHT away DH is on the phone, I have GOT to ring her, yeah right...... He asks me if I have a problem, not really, don't care, I guess he cannot see the irony of it all, it's HIS day, but he has to jump through a hoop or two to talk to her. He says I can hear the convo, if I like, why bother ??? Does it really matter anymore ???? Nothing changes, and never will. He is still on the phone his quick hello is now, like, fifteen minutes long ........

I'm feeling pissed off, it's amazing how just hearing a skid's voice can still depress me, what is that about ??? I didn't listen but just heard her hello before I left the room....

Comments

bi's picture

wow. what a winner of a daughter she is. i know what you mean about her voice. i thought i was the only one who cringed and shuddered and actually felt my mood spiral downward at the sound of my sd's voice. i can't even stand to hear someone say her name!

Sweetnothings's picture

No, you'd think with them being grown up AND thousands of miles away, it would be getting so easier, but we still bump along.

The call ended, DH came to find me, reading the newspaper in another room, so not stomping around or even huffy. I didn't ask about sd21, it's one of the " rules " of disengagement, you do NOT bring skid up in conversation, because it's a quick hop and a jump down THAT path of CONVO leading to an arguement......

I am happy reading, but Dh is trying to be all nice and loving, and gee whizz, guess what I am NOT feeling the lurve at this right moment.

It's almost as if he KNOWS that jumping to her tune is wrong, but , hell, he's been doing it for years and it's his guilty Dad habit, and now he needs to be reassured and loved by me. Grrrr !!! He doesn't talk about the convo, thank goodness, and do you know what, hearing about sd21's latest blah, blah, blah, doesn't matter to me.

Now, DH feels unloved, well, gee, I feel like I am sometimes just picked up and then brushed off, to suit his mood too, and now he knows how it feels ???

He's asked me if I'm ok, has he upset me, why am I not happy, I told him I love him, and that I'm reading the paper.... Still !!!

As I'm disengaged, I can't really tell him, that I think it's SHOCKING and I'm appalled that he has to chase the sd21 on this day to talk to her..... But I'm not in the mood to fight about this again !!!

Well, I guess it'll begin again now with the younger skid, DH will be looking for him on his internet sites where, skid lurks, usually avoiding DH.

I will not have an opinion on that EITHER, my disengaged lips are sealed.....

Sweetnothings's picture

DH tried to get a bit smoochy coochy with me, but I'm not in the mood......

So he got a bit huffy wth me, though any interest in me, stopped soon enough, younger skid is online AND available to chat for a while....

DH was asking me if there are any problems, I replied, after a pause, no, he said you didn't sound sure, OMG, I'm swallowing the words I want to pour out to him, and furiously humming the disengaged song in my head......