I haven't posted a blog in awhile. We have court in December to have SS taken off the CS & BM has ramped up the drama.

A bit of background on this particular part of the story:

We discovered awhile back (probably 1 1/2 years ago), through a friend of DH's that BM's neighbor is DH's friend's future MIL. We never mentioned the discovery to BM or the kids, & DH's friend never mentioned it to FMIL. She (FMIL) was the one who mentioned to friend that DH's kids were not attending school & she told them all about the "rif-raf" coming & going from BM's house at all hours of the day & night.

DH & I took SS & his gf out to eat a couple of weekends ago. SS has met DH's friend a few times & out of the blue said, "Dad, what did you say (friends) girlfriend's name is"? DH asked why & SS said he was "just wondering". Right. So, DH told him her name.

After we dropped them off, DH & I agreed that he wouldn't just be wondering something like that. We figured they'd found out there was a connection. So, DH talked to SS a few days later & asked about it, wanting to find out why he asked. SS was hesitant, & DH said, "Son, your old dad's smarter than you give him credit for being. I already know about what you're keeping from me", but I don't understand why".

They talked about it. SS said they were in the neighbor's house (friend's FMIL) a couple weeks ago & BM was looking at the pictures she had in the living room. She saw friend's picture & mentioned that he looked familiar but she couldn't place him. SS looked at the picture & said, "That's dad's friend, (name)".

SS asked how DH found out & he told him we've known for about 1 1/2 years. He explained that he didn't say anything about it because he didn't want any shit to get started.

Well, it didn't take 2 hours from the time it left DH's mouth for our phone to ring again & hear it from DH's friend. 2 hours!!! It went from DH to SS to BM to FMIL to friend's gf to friend & back to DH, & boy had the story grown!

Given that background, this is what transpired last night:

So, we live far enough out that our cell phones don't ring through most of the time when we're at home. The only way to know someone has called is if they leave a message.

DH's phone beeped around 9:30pm to let him know he had a new voicemail. He assumed it was someone calling about where he needed to show up for work this morning, so he called from the house phone to retrieve the new message.

By the expression on his face I could tell it wasn't good. He listened, & listened...& listened. Finally, as the message is still playing I asked who it was. He said, "You're not going to believe this", & then he listened some more. The message was from BM's neighbor, the woman homeschooling SD. I swear, the message she left was no less than 4 minutes long.

His jaw was on the floor by the time it finished playing & he handed me the phone.

I hit ** to replay. The shit that woman said to him was unreal.

She introduced herself by name & lit into him about what a piece of shit he is. She called him a deadbeat dad, a deadbeat drug addict, & a deadbeat alcoholic all in one sentence. She verified that she is in fact homschooling SD & is "proud of it". She stated that she is proud of SD as an individual & that "she's a whole lot smarter than her daddy is". She told him she hates that he spends any time around her grandkids (friend's kids) & that she'll support BM 110% in court. She said that SS & SD have told her all the shit he's said about her & verified that DH doesn't know her well enough to say anything about her & he needs to "keep his mouth off of her". (That part sounds really gross, but it's what she said.) She said that DH has been a very bad influence on her future son-in-law & has turned him into an alcoholic.

Now, SD doesn't even speak to DH, so I'm not sure why she's saying that SS & SD have told her what he's said about her. The only thing he told SS about her was that he knew she was their neighbor & he reminded SS that we took him to her old house to see their big turkey before she left her husband & moved out to where she is now. That's it!

SS called & told DH that neighbor/teacher had sent a text saying that she's cussed DH up & down several times in the past. DH told SSy that they'd never spoken enough for her to have the opportunity, now she's pissed like DH acts like he knows all about her!

DH & friend drink when they're together. They're both grown & they make their own choices. For her to suggest that DH's influence is what makes friend drink, she's as big a moron as BM is. DH's influence isn't the problem. The problem is that neighbor/teacher is a control freak like BM, & is pissed because friend chooses to stay out fishing & drinking with DH & she can't MAKE him not do it. God forbid somebody do something neighbor/teacher doesn't fucking like.

Same thing with DH being around her grandkids. She's raised her kids. friend & his gf (neighbor's daughter) are raising their own kids & neighbor's pissed because she doesn't like the way they're raising them. She can't control it.

As for supporting BM 110% in court, evidently BM has led her to believe there is something to battle. The only thing being addressed in court is CS for SS. There is nothing to fight or support or not support. The kid is 18 & not in school. That's it!

She friended me on FB yesterday. I thought perhaps she wanted to see what we're about. I accepted her friend request (with security applied the same as I have it set on SS & BM's mom).

Obviously her friending me on FB wasn't about trying to get to know DH & what's he's about. So, I unfriended her this morning & changed my status to:

"Ignorance is what we spew when we rant based on lies we've been told. Be wise enough to get the facts before you speak."

I made that status public, so that's all she can see now.

I will continue to post statuses with similar ideas & I will begin posting some to educate about Parental Alienation abuse on a regular basis, & I will make those public so that neighbor can see them. SD will be able to see them if she looks at my page, but BM won't because I have her blocked. I'm sure she'll be notified of them as they are posted, though.

DH is pissed. He's upset about the kids being involved in all of this. He's nervous about this woman homeschooling his daughter because of the anger & involvement she has toward him.

I'm not sure what will happen in court. It's just supposed to be about pulling SS off the CS. I don't know if BM will pull more into it than that, or if the judge will let her. I would think it'd have to be filed as another court hearing, but I don't know for sure.

I need to call the phone company & find out how to keep the message she left. On ours, even if we save them they go away after 2 weeks. We need to be sure he has it for future reference.

I want DH to ask the judge to order SD back into public school next year so that he can contact the teachers, keep up with her attendance & her grades & be involved, but I don't know if the judge will do that. DH is hesitant to address/argue it just because he gets fucked every time he tries to fight something.

Why can't she (BM) just let shit fucking go??? I swear, there will never be rest as long as she's alive. It's like her mission in life is to ensure that DH never gets a day of peace.