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BM: "What I do with the kids on my weekends is MY business." ---uhh, not when it violates stipulation!

SteppingUp's picture

Last weekend we joined my fiance's entire mom's side of the family for a huge get-together, without the skids. It wasn't our weekend to have them. BM wouldn't budge on it to let us have them.

However, we arrived at DF's mom's house and BOTH of his brothers (who happen to be friends with BM on Facebook) said, "Where are the kids? I thought you were bringing them this weekend?"

DF said, "No, it's not our weekend."

DF brother said, "Well we happened to see BM's Facebook status pop up and it said she was having a kids-free weekend, so we figured you were bringing them."

Hmmmmmmmmmmmm....

Monday arrives, and we ask the skids the usual, "What did you do this weekend?" SD5 replies that they got to stay at Grandma BM's TWO nights (ahem, Friday and Saturday night). DF casually asks, "Where was mom? Did she go on a trip?" SD says, "No. Mom was just at home."

DF couldn't resist. He was pissed. We asked her for the weekend, she wouldn't budge, and the whole family was asking the whole time where the kids were -- and then BM pawned them off for the entire weekend ANYWAY???

After calling BM and telling her that it was pretty crappy of her to not let us take the skids to see family when she didn't do anything with them (and they see their Grandma BM at least once or twice a week), BM's first response was, "Oh you believe a 5 year old over ME?" (This is always her automatic response when she's caught in a lie, which is funny because she's giving him more reasons to believe in a 5 year old!)

DF tells her that SD has no reason to lie about staying at Grandma's for two nights. Also tells her that his own family saw her Facebook status and was asking us who had the kids. Of course she says, "What are you having people spy on me now?" DF says, "You're the one that's friends with them on FB, of course they're going to notice when you post things about the kids, their neice and nephew." (He doesn't mention that her facebook isn't private ANYWAYs...)

Then, BM changes the subject again, "It's NONE of your business what I do with the kids when they're with me for the weekend!!"

DF says, "Actually, it IS my business. It says in the stipulation that if Son is going to be in someone else's care overnight that I have right of refusal." This flabbergasted BM and she stuttered and changed the subject until DF told her again that something like this better not happen anymore.

Such. An. Idiot.

Comments

SillyGilly's picture

Our BM does the same thing. She doesn't really want the kids she just doens't want DH to have them. It's disgusting!

Gia's picture

Wow, that was pretty selfish of her. And SD said that her mom just stayed at home because she didn't know, but her mom probably went our and had fun while they were at grandma's.... Dirol

SteppingUp's picture

Oh, and she did admit that it was her birthday weekend so she "deserved" a break... of course she went out and partied both nights!

sixteensmom's picture

What if you just take them. Don't be home when she comes to pick up on Thursday. Skip school on Friday and be gone till Sunday night when she comes to get them. .... Ok I know you can't but thats what rules.don't.apply.to.me.bm would pull on us.

Tell dh to get that change done !

SteppingUp's picture

Blender that sounds like no fun. I'd fight for that visitation order to change quick! I can't imagine having not a single weekend that isn't split...that seems like such a hassle for everyone involved (including BM!).

SteppingUp's picture

Sounds like she didn't want you to know she was in Vegas and tried to cover her tracks? How dumb!

I can totally see the BM in my situation doing something like this...what weirdos. Why not just let your kids be with the other parent if you aren't going to have them?

sixteensmom's picture

So plan a weekend away for you and dh. Have grandma or a sitter come stay with the kids during your time. If bm can do it so can you.