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Skid mad that you're a SAHM for their sibling?

step.life's picture

Submitted by step.life on Mon, 07/18/2016 - 5:57pm

Does anyone else's skid seem mad that you are a stay at home mom for an ours baby? We have SD 50/50 eow and DH and BM put SD9 in a mutual summer camp program. I stay home with BS8mo. SD has said the following "Why does BS get to stay home with Strp.life, why can't I stay home too?" And "BM said if she was Step.life she would let me stay home in the summer" and also "Why can't I stay home with Step.life, does she have to go shopping or something during the day" in a snarky tone. I have a feeling BM is trying to make it look like I'm an Evil SM because she doesn't stay home with me and we send her to camp. (Even though BM also sends her, but works out of the home). Is SD or BM jealous of my SAHM status?

Comments

Snowflake's picture

Submitted by Snowflake on Mon, 07/18/2016 - 7:00pm

I agree with imasmom. As far as sd's feelings.

Although the BM shouldn't be weighing in on what you do with your life and your time. If she tries to make it seem to SD that you are evil, then so be it. You aren't, you know that. And it will just make it harder on sd's emotional development. But that is on her mom.

robin333's picture

Submitted by robin333 on Mon, 07/18/2016 - 7:51pm

I agree with ImaSmom. 9 is an age where the kids start asking questions without tact or discretion. They're trying to understand things. I don't think jealousy plays any part.

I would simply answer her questions in a matter of fact manner.

ntm's picture

Submitted by ntm on Mon, 07/18/2016 - 10:47pm

What a crappy childhood I had without even knowing it! I got shipped off to camp while my mother stayed home with my baby sister and it never occurred to me to complain about it. I need a redo so I can be a brat!

SecondGeneration's picture

Submitted by SecondGeneration on Tue, 07/19/2016 - 6:57am

Kid logic: kids cannot stay home alone, if parents are going to work then kids go to camp.

Kid knows an adult is staying home with a child: well why can't I stay home too?

I don't think there's jealousy per say, I think it's more the kid figuring out what's happening and why.

step.life's picture

Submitted by step.life on Tue, 07/19/2016 - 10:45am

Right. That's what I told my husband, I guess she can stay home and help clean!

I think I'm just trying to figure it out. We dropped her off one week and she loved it, went to a week on BMs time and then came back here with all these questions and accusatory tones!

hereiam's picture

Submitted by hereiam on Tue, 07/19/2016 - 11:00am

Sounds like BM is the one who is jealous that you get to stay home with your baby.

And I think you are right, BM is trying to make you out to be the evil SM by telling her daughter that if she were the SM, SHE would her step kid stay home with her.

I also agree with Echo, you owe nobody an explanation.

loveandfitness's picture

Submitted by loveandfitness on Tue, 07/19/2016 - 3:21pm

Agreed. What kind of kid would rather stay home as opposed to going to camp. You should call the camp director and see if anything is going on that might make her not wanna go. If not, chalk it up to someones jealousy and stand your ground. As someone who didn't get much time with our baby, enjoy all the alone time with her you can!