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Pickup Location Violation

step.life's picture

What happens when the Court Order specifies a pickup location, but BM always says SD will be at XYZ location (whichever inconsistent babysitter she left SD with), and if DH wants to see her he can go to random location to pick up SD? This is a violation correct? How can we stop it from happening?

Comments

Acratopotes's picture

CO states pick up and drop off location.....

Dh should simply go there and if SD is not there leave... then tell BM she's in violation of the court order, he will file it as such.

BM is controlling the situation, DH should stop it.

CompletelyPuzzled's picture

In our CO, it states that pickup/drop off are at the closest police station. BM doesn't visit with SD10 any more, but we had so many issues with this when she still did. She would show up at our house at random times. The last time she picked up SD10, she came up to our front door and was knocking on it at 3 a.m. We actually called the police when she refused to leave. They made her leave our property but they also had DH give SD10 to her at that time. They wouldn't enforce or even talk to her about following the order. They just told us to go back to court. You can keep insisting that she stick to the CO, but I am not sure that anything will be done unless you go back to court.

twoviewpoints's picture

For me it would depend on why Kid isn't available at CO'd pick-up place. If it's because BM is working and the requested spot is the babysitters, no problem.

If BM is farting around visiting here or there or just off doing whatever she pleases and dumps kid at a relatives while she runs having free-time, forget it. Dad isn't a taxi.

If BM is actually working during exchange, I'm going to assume the CO didn't take that into consideration when drawn up. Unless this babysitter is way out and causes more time and cost to me than the CO stated place, I'm probably going to be good with it (working BMs get less CS, LOL) .

If BM is off shopping in town B when she lives in town A and wants me to come to town B and meet at McDonald's so she doesn't have to come back to town A for exchange, forget it. Town A, usual spot, usual time.

Thumper's picture

The court order has outlined specifics to avoid such nonsense and yet, BM refuses to follow it, yes she is in contempt.

WHEN the bm calls or sends a text with the new location. Reply: I will pick up sally at the location our court order reads. HIT SEND

I agree, go to the location and be a little early as your court order reads. Purchase a pack of gum or have someone run in and buy something, save the receipt. It will be proof you were there ON time. IF child is not brought---send mom a text OR call.

" I am here at such and such" I will wait for 30minutes in case your in traffic. If you don't show I am to assume you blocking "sally" from visitation.

Don't listen to the garbage IF she starts to spew, oh so you are giving UP your visitation, I am calling my lawyer junk.
Just repeat "I am here at such and such as the court order states to pick up child"

After one or two of these she might get the hint you are GOING to follow the court order. You may end UP not having the child for a weekend or two.

you may have to call your lawyer to have her in the hot seat for violations.

Each visitation go to the court order assigned place..get a receipt.

**THIS is not about being flexible on your part. There is nothing wrong with a parent calling the other with an OMG, can we switch this weekends meeting place Mrs Doubtfire has to go to a meeting and she is pressed for time.**

Having a regular time AND location provides the child with something he/she can count on. Chaos is not in the best interest of a child or anyone for that matter.

You can fix this byfollowing the order UNLESS a true emergency or out of the blue situation.

step.life's picture

Thanks. I guess we will just file contempt if it continues. We think if SD is at a babysitter, relative, etc. BM needs to tell that person to take SD to the designated place and time to meet DH if BM isn't available. But if she wont tell them to, then we will file against BM.