Hey everyone im new here, i'm a father to 5 children, 1 sd10 and 1 ss13 then 3 bio 3, 5 & 6 all girls.
For the most part we have a very energetic household and lots of fun getting through our day's.
For the last year however my sd10 has really went out of control, she is in no way a bad child and is very loveing when she wants to be, she excels in her school work and does a few extra curicular activities which in whole will greatly benefit her in the long run.
I dont know where to start with how she behaves, so from here it may sound like a rant . . .
She is so full of energy it is just incredible! I have in the past compared her to the cute little puppy that just wont settle down lol. Things started just over a year ago getting a bit odd about her behaviour and my recollections are it started for no apparent reason with my SD10 (SD9 at the time) removeing a knife from the drawer and then cutting a hole in our settee, I was furious how ? why ? what was she thinking ???
Then she developed this talking back when being told off, when she talks back she is'nt being nasty at all she is assuming it is her chance to defend her actions. Call me old fashioned but if I catch a child misbehaving trying to reason with me just does'nt work. My wife usually returns home from work around 8.30 pm when the youngest children are winding down for bed, this is when my SD10 usually starts throwing them around in a playful manner and playing games where they all get to the stage of huge excitement that I cant get them to sleep till way after 10pm. I have pointed this out to my Sd10 to no avail so much so that I know she will do the exact same this evening.
She constantly talks when adults are engaged in chat and butts in to adult conversation, even takeing parts of the conversation and passing it on to other family members.
She will read a book out loud when we are all watching t.v which I kindly pointed out is pretty rude as I believe she has to respect that not everyone wants to read the book. If I tell of her siblings for misbehaving she takes my very same tone as me and tells them off for the very same thing I have just done, now correct me if im wrong but I am the adult the children respond to my corrections and not that of my SD10.
When her mother is away at work my SD10 is very self sufficient and gets on with things without the need to be led, OMG when my wife gets home its just soooo different, she cant wash her own hair, she cant do her homework, seriously she cant do anything at all. Only last night she had to do a written story for her homework renacting a scenario from her thoughts from a sentence giveing to her, for the first 30 minutes of her homework she asked how does this sound so many times that when i checked her work she had written 1 line . . I asked her to leave the room and finish it in her bedroom then bring it to us and we can judge how she done.
Guess what? only 10 minutes later she arrived with over 20 odd lines and tbh an interesting story she had concucted, I appluaded her efforts in which she was extremely proud of herself and we congratulated her.
I then pointed out she made 2 spelling mistakes on extremely difficult words for her age and to use her dictionary to find the correct spelling. OMG why did I even suggest to correct her mistakes for the next 30 minutes she made it out as if I had just amputated her legs whilst cuddling her BM and sobbing.
Haveing just answered a phonecall amidst writing this, I took the phone call on the cordless phone and sat on the staircase and while chatting on the phone my eyes were drawn to what I can only describe as graffiti on my wall on the staircase. . . It is clear it is my SD10 's handwriting as she has written all her siblings names one after the other why has she done this . . .
Things are getting on top of me now, I feel like im bullying her by constantly correcting her and even at times when she is doing something that really isn't a huge issue i'm on her back correcting her which makes me feel I need to now seriously approach things different with her.
I do not know what to do . . :?
Lastly everyone in the house seems to have no issue dealing with the basic rules in the home its just my SD10 that feels the need to break the boundaries.