You are here

SD and her mother...........

SoLost1988's picture

As I posted before I will just randomly post tid bits of what goes on with my skids,SS13 and SD9. The newest problem is I am 33 weeks pregnant,with a boy,my first. At first both kids said "No we don't want another sibling" but then my SS changed his mind and decided it wouldn't be so bad. My SD on the other hand would very rudely say "I HOPE IT'S A BOY,WE DON'T NEED ANOTHER GIRL!". Well I was hoping for a girl,as we do have a lot of boys in our family. But I was blessed with a boy. When I announced to both that it was in fact a boy,my SS was excited to have his own baby brother,SD on the other hand wasn't very much interested. She didn't care,as long as this BOY stayed a boy and stayed out of her way and her daddy's way.

What makes it harder is her mother who I have said before SD thinks she Sh*ts rainbows and unicorns. Ever since I found out I was pregnant and SD went home and announced this to her mother,her mother now has changed. She will constantly blow up my husbands phone for random favors for their daughter,random questions about money,and just recently asked for money for herself. She now drops her daughter off as frequent as possible,and now SD is asking why can't she live with us. Well we don't have the room or the money to afford 3 kids right now as we are getting ready for the new baby and as we all know kids (especially newborns) are not cheap. That's what he is paying child support for. So why continue to ask for more money now?! Why the sudden change?! If her mother isn't blowing up his phone his daughter is with questions of when will she be able to go over again (after she JUST left). She knows the schedule,it's every OTHER weekend. My husband has just announced that for some strange reason his daughters mother is letting him have her AGAIN this summer. Well my baby is due this summer,what a coincidence. I asked why because we had her last summer and he said "well I don't know she never used to let me have her this often".

I feel as though his daughter and her mom are smothering us because it's like they say "Just because your having a new baby do NOT forget about this CHILD!!" What's with all the favors and questions now? Why the random daughter drop offs now? Yes she will randomly drop her daughter off without warning now on unscheduled days. Another thing that get's me is I can't have just "The Baby's things" his daughter has to touch and play with everything. I chose Dr.Seuss as his theme. NOT ONCE did I hear a word of Dr.Seuss from his daughter since I had met her and now "Oh I love those books!!". I bought my baby the "Cat in the hat" movie (for the future) and was saving it on his little changing table I set up in our room,well she came in and opened it announcing how in love with the movie she was and she was now going to watch it,without asking me if she could even take it. AAAAAAAAAAAH!!! His daughter and her mother are driving me insane!

Comments

smdh's picture

Yep, BM is asserting her Golden Uterus status and making sure you all are reminded that her daughter comes first. Dh needs to not give her extra money or do favors.

SoLost1988's picture

Oh he hasn't given her anything extra but she continues to ask. Sounds exactly right. She did it with his son. She made sure to make it very clear her daughter comes first and ONLY! and is now doing it with the new baby uuugh!

SoLost1988's picture

We've done special things for the kids already just to make sure they know that just because there's gonna be a new baby does not mean that they will be forgotten and ignored. But her mother thinks that is not enough,her daughter must come first and must be the ONLY one. Even before his son,and now even before his 2nd son. His son has a different mother ( I may add). But she passed away when he was 5 and that's a different story. But his daughter and her mother are driving me to the edge with this new random "PAY ATTENTION TO ME AND MY DAUGHTER!!!!" BS they are pulling.

SoLost1988's picture

He has mentioned that he can't say anything to her mother about it because he fears that she will become a monster and take his daughter away all together,because apparently she has been a monster before. So yes at some points he seems annoyed with the new change but says he can't say a word about it to her mother because of what he fears she might do.

CrazieCoconut86's picture

He can't tell BM, "I will love to have SD for the summer. However, when the baby comes, SD will need to go back to you. SoLost and I will need some time to adjust to the baby."

I know... I am thinking logically and I know from dealing with the BM in my case, they don't have that capability. But, I think he needs to say something along those lines.

Also, I would document all the times she is being dropped off unexpectedly and all the requests for more money. I bet if you went to court to change custody and child support, BM would stop that crap right away. They tend to be money hungry and they won't want to do anything to jeopardize their free income.

SoLost1988's picture

Thank you so much for this advice!! As much as I would want him to say something along those lines I know he won't lol. It would be a dream though! I did not know we could mention that in court thank you so much for that Smile