Do you ever
just want to vent on here and then just realize what a bitch you really are? Gah, I'm having one of those nights. I just hate everybody and everything.
I think the torture of this life has truly turned me into someone I don't even recognize.
This day has been horrible and I cannot even put into words what I'm feeling because I even hate myself for feeling the way I feel.
Even in anonymity, I can't do it. Ugh. What does that say about me?
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Guilty! Yes, I have. But it
Guilty!
Yes, I have. But it still feels good to get it out.
I've also posted things and had some people tell me I was a bitch...then I go and reread what I wrote and realized I had left some stuff out. But then again, if I included everything to explain a certain vent or situation, I would have a post the size of "War and Peace" and nobody would even want to take the time to read it and reply.
You know what? I have to get
You know what? I have to get this out. And maybe if the WHOLE stepfamily drama is considered, and not just this isolated incident, MAYBE I'm not such a bitch, even though I feel like it. But here goes:
SO and I had the afternoon and evening alone (rare occurrence).
Around 9:30, BM calls and says that SD15 has been in a car accident. When he gets off the phone, he tells me she was in a car accident, both air bags deployed, the motor was ripped from the truck, and SD is in the ER.
He rushes off to the ER, which is an hour away from us.
When he gets home, approximately two and a half hours later, this is the story:
SD went on a date, the boy hit a bump in the road, it sent the truck across the road into a tree. Air bags deployed, but he was still able to back the truck up and head on down the road. However, soon after he gets going, the truck just quits. "The motor must have blown." He calls his father, who comes and tows the truck home, and then takes SD15 home. Since she is home alone, she calls her friend and tells her what happened. The friend's mother comes over, and since SD is complaining that her hand hurts, she takes her to the ER.
SO knew, during the phone call from BM that the friend's mother took her to the ER.
She checked out fine. She has some skinned knuckles.
Don't get me wrong. Please, please, please. I'm SO glad that she was okay.
But DAMN. BM and SO led me to believe that she was critically injured.
AND she's on SO's insurance, so that will cost us a pretty penny, I'm sure.
Geez. I'm a bitch. Go ahead, trash me.
Oh, and his insurance package
Oh, and his insurance package has some kind of $1,500 "care credit" that is spread amongst him and his three kids. It helps to cover costs before his deductible kicks in. He NEVER goes to the doctor, even when he should. I'm sure the skinned knuckles just took care of the care credit and more. But he is so, so thankful that she's okay and that the friend's mother took her to the ER. While I'm here thinking he's a dumbass and feeling like a bitch for thinking that.
No trashing from me. I
No trashing from me. I understand and can appreciate a BM who makes things out to be a bigger deal or more of a dire situation that really is.
For Christ sake, anytime the SKs start getting a stuffy nose or sore throat, instead of trying medicine or maybe wait until the next day and schedule a Dr appointment, BM takes them to the ER (and I understand the joy of having to pay that ER bill too since they're on DHs insurance).
If SKs foot or ankle hurts from gym class...its rush them off to the ER for x-rays right away.
BM called DH crying and hysterical she was in an accident dropping the kids off at school and blah blah blah. DH thought she/the kids wer seriously injured, it was a big deal etc.....NO, she hit another car as she was going less than 5 MPH through the school parking lot.
She had to get exploratory surgery for an ovarian cyst. I've have plenty and have had numerous surgeries for them so I knew what the deal was. She had the kids thinking she had cancer and was putting stuff on Facebook about how serious her "major operation" was and how she is lucky to be alive.
She is such a drama queen and makes EVRYTHING out to be a big deal.
I keep telling myself to try
I keep telling myself to try to imagine that it was my biological kid that had been in the accident. It's not helping. I think I would have given them an ibuprofen and tell them to stop whining. I'm just not a fan of dr's, hospitals, and er's. But then again, I've been uninsured for a large part of my life.
That sounds like me too!
That sounds like me too!
Thank you! SO certainly
Thank you! SO certainly acted like I was a major bitch for not being overwhelmed with thankfulness that she was okay. Ugh.
I think I am angry SO much
I think I am angry SO much that I've started questioning all my emotions. But you ladies really do help me with the issues I deal with. It's nice to have understanding, and yes, even the checks.
fyi: That bill needs to go to
fyi: That bill needs to go to BM and the kids auto insurance... not your health insurance
Make sure the hospital knows its "auto related"
since the skid lives with BM the way the hospital will bill is
1) BM's insurance
2) Driver of the cars insurance
3) health insurance
You are exactly right!!!
You are exactly right!!! Thank you!
you were expecting to have a
you were expecting to have a nice evening with your SO, yet it was interrupted by some moronic crap from BM and SD. you have nothing to be embarrassed about, you're totally not wrong for feeling annoyed, disappointed, angry, etc.
your SO probably felt like he would be accused of being a jerk if he didn't go see skid while she was in the ER...
have you talked to your SO yet? maybe it would help to talk it out with him? I hope you can reschedule your night together
Alone time for us is very,
Alone time for us is very, very rare. I even made my BS17 mad yesterday by running him, his GF and two friends out of the house. lol. He thinks he's too old or something to visit with his dad and always hangs around here.
I'm so sure that SO WOULD have been accused of being a jerk if he hadn't gone. He's commonly referred to as the "sperm donor" anyway. I guess sometimes he is in a no-win situation.
Thank you (all of you) for being understanding.
He's taking me today to go be with my mother, who is having a pace maker put in tomorrow morning. I'll be staying for two nights. Hopefully, we can have a quiet dinner and talk some tonight. If he's not giving me the silent treatment. smh.
Oh yes. I had a run where I
Oh yes. I had a run where I had zero tolerance for anyone and it manifested in my participation in STalk. That only ended a couple of weeks ago. People just pissed me off. I know how you feel. Even I thought I was an asshole during that run.
Deep breaths and take care of yourself. Just because you are having a rough run does not make you a bitch before you went in to it or when you come out of it.
Good luck.