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BM Wins Custody of Both?

Rumplestiltskin's picture

This morning, BM got an ex parte emergency custody order for both boys. SO's lawyer is in the hospital and he is getting a new one. This BM hasn't kept the oldest in 5 years, and she only started taking the youngest 50/50 about 6 months ago. How can this happen? Will the police just show up and take them? The youngest is supposed to get off the bus at SO's house in 30 minutes and i am the only one here (this is my off day from work.) Does anyone have experience with this? 

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Rumplestiltskin's picture

10 minutes until the bus is set to arrive. SO is meeting with his lawyer and SS 16 is headed to a dr appt. I am here alone. Sort of freaking out. 

CastleJ's picture

I dont have personal experience with this, but from what I know about them they can be granted by a judge, without hearing both sides or a court date. Your DH only has 14 days to object to it. If he does not object, it will be entered as a default order. In the meantime, if she was granted the order, its already in effect. 

These are typically ruled as temporary orders but could have been granted if BM indicated that the boys may be in danger.

Rumplestiltskin's picture

Do the police show up to take them? SS is set to het off the bus soon. I guess i will have no choice but to comply with whatever they say? SO's lawyer is in the hospital and he is currently meeting with a new one. So far they haven't sent me any instructions. 

CastleJ's picture

I dont know that piece of it. If the police do show up, require that they show you a court order. If they do, release your SS to them. If you don't, you could be found in contempt and it will only make a scene for SS. 

Just remember, this whole situation is on BM and if the police do arrive to take him, with or without BM, just remember that she did this to SS, not you. Tell SS you love him and will see him soon. Don't panic because it may cause SS to panic. 

tog redux's picture

How in the world did she get an ex parte order? She must have lied about something.

Ugh, I'm sorry. This is a BM determined to hang onto that child support, isn't she? If she shows up for the kids, just tell them to go and stay out of it.

Rumplestiltskin's picture

I don't know what she could have said. The older one, maybe, due to the school thing. But the younger has been in school, same one he's gone to since kindergarten. The one right around the corner from SO's house.

So far no bus. Maybe she picked him up from school.

tog redux's picture

They wouldn't do an ex parte hearing for a kid who has been truant for a while now.

Hopefully she lied her face off, and DH can use that to his advantage. She is truly a HCBM though, now you know.

Rumplestiltskin's picture

She is definitely a HCBM. Any time SO does anything she doesn't like, she calls his parents, and all of his siblings to try to get them on her side. It has worked in the past, too. Due to family pressure he has caved more than once.

Earlier today, before we knew about the ex parte, he spent hours on the phone just trying to convince his mom and sister he wasn't wrong. BM also is very close with the wife of one of his brothers. I told him he needs to worry less about what his mom thinks and more about what his lawyer is doing, and what he can do to get SS in school. 

CastleJ's picture

These are usually only granted in situations where the child's safety is in question. My bet is that BM scrambled once she realized there was no set custody and figured this would help build her case. She probably said something about safety or abuse. 

1dad4kids's picture

Eek. Just treat everything normal. I would assume if BM had the order she would have picked your SS up from school. If he comes there, act normal. If the cops show up, let him go with them. Cooperate. This is not your battle. 

 

advice.only2's picture

The one time we had to do an ex parte hearing Spawn was already in custody of the police, because the police took the kids with them to the station while Meth Mouth was being booked.
More than likely she would just pick SS up from the bus stop given she has the emergency custody.
I agree I'm shocked a judge granted an ex parte, she must have claimed some sort of abuse against your DH, I would be prepared for CPS to be on your door step next.

Rumplestiltskin's picture

So....nothing happened. SS got off the bus as usual. SO is still at the lawyer, no word. 

Rumplestiltskin's picture

BM just texted and told SO to send the boys over. He acted like he didn't know anything. She asked if the police had served the papers, but they haven't. SO's lawyer who is in the hospital told him that BM's lawyer said the ex parte was signed, but the new lawyer says the judge is out of town so he hasn't signed it yet. SO is planning to send SS to the school in BM's district tomorrow but have him stay here. If papers are served, the lawyer said to comply and send the kids. 

tog redux's picture

So she is a giant liar. If the judge hasn't signed it, then she's just blowing smoke. Hopefully the judge won't sign it.

Maxwell09's picture

There's still a chance the judge will not sign her ex-parte so keep the boys going on the routine you already have until you are officially told to do otherwise. If the papers are still on the judges desk, your DHs lawyer should have left a message with the judge's clerk to put in a response so the judge has both sides to look at before issuing the Ex Parte. 
 

Rumplestiltskin's picture

Yes, the new lawyer has already started trying to block it. Apparently BM threw in all kinds of allegations and the lawyer said it's hard to read due to the general histrionic nature of it.