O/T - DW has me very frustrated today
So, our BS3 has had a bad cough since January that just seems to linger. We kept taking him to his normal doctor's office, seeing different doctors there and it was always something different and no one could give us an answer or make the cough go away. We finally switched doctors and the one we saw immediately sent BS3 to an allergist.
So, I take Bs3 to the allergist and through allergy testing that show he's not allergic to anything, really. So no answer there, but the allergist does an exam and seems that his sinuses are completely closed so the only place the snot is draining is down his throat, causing him to cough. Allergist tells me to give him a 30-day course of stronger antibiotics (3, 10-day courses), nasal spray once daily and a steroid - he suspects chronic sinusitis. We make an appointment for two weeks later to check up on him.
Then I have to go out of town for work for over a week, so DW has to take him to the next allergist appt. She does and we talk about it, she says that the allergist says to finish up the 2nd course of antibiotics (at day 20), to stop the steroid and nasal spray and start giving zyrtec every night. I was a little shocked and told DW at that time that he originally told me that BS3 should take the whole 30 days of antiobiotics, but she swears he told her to stop at 20 so he would be off it at the next appointment. Ok, so we stop everything except the zyrtec (which admittedly, we've both forgotten a few times).
So, fast forward to today, the next appointment. I again take Bs3 to the doctor. He asks "Is he still taking the nasal spray?" I say no, my wife said you told us to stop. "Is he still taking the antibiotics?" No, you told my wife to stop at day 20. "Are you giving the zyrtec?" Yes, but we've forgotten a few times.
He proceeds to tell me that he told DW only to stop the steroid. The antibiotic was to go through day 30 - when he said finish it up, he meant all 30 days. (We had to renew for each 10 day increment). He also never told her to stop the nasal spray. He said to me "If you aren't going to follow my directions, BS3 is not going to get better."
So, I was embarrassed, and sort of angry with DW as she had gotten pretty much everything incorrect about what the doctor had said. Maybe it was a misunderstanding between her and the doctor, but I definitely felt blind-sided, especially after I asked her specifically about the anti-biotics. They hand-wrote out directions in clear english and handed them to me before I left. It was a pretty insulting trip to the doctor's office.
I called DW at work (probably a bad idea) and told her that the doctor had told me basically the exact opposite of what she had told me happened at the last appointment. She argued that it was my fault, I told her the course of antibiotics was 20 days (untrue) and that when he said to stop she thought he meant everything. So I told her in no uncertain terms that I was embarrassed and that this could have been avoided if she had just confirmed exactly what the doctor wanted. She said she had to go, she needed to do something.
Calls me back and starts telling me what a jerk I am for yelling at her while she was at work(not once did I yell), that it is my fault really because she didn't know how long of a course the antibiotics were (it says right on the damn bottle!). I told her she was the one being the jerk, to put herself in my shoes, and that I never raised my voice to her, although she is taking it that way because she feels attacked because I basically told her it was her fault. I'm not a yeller but this time I raised my voice because I was defending myself... and she hangs up on me
In retrospect, I should have just waited to talk to her about it until after work, that was my fault. However I am pissed at the implication that this is somehow my fault - it is hers or the doctor's, I wasn't even there! Maybe there was a misunderstanding between her and the doctor but how embarrassed/pissed would she have been in the same situation. And god forbid it was the same situation with SD7 in place of BS3 - I'd be sleeping on the couch for a month.
The lesson I got out of this was to wait until after work to discuss an issue like this. I also feel like now I have to be the one to take BS3 to his appointments to make sure we get everything right... though I know that is not the case, just me being angry.