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I hate my life.

mommawowa's picture

So of course Darth Vader exerts her control over MY husband by constantly changing plans; and he lets her!

She has had SS9 for a week (we had him for a week prior). We were supposed to get him back Friday. She asked for another day because his favorite uncle was coming in town for just the night and would be leaving first thing Saturday morning. DH had to work for a bit out of town Saturday, and I was on "her" side of town Saturday teaching CPR. I called DH at 1 p.m. today and asked what's going on with SS9, he had lost track of time. Called Vader, of course she didn't answer. An hour later, he tries calling again, and texting. Finally he calls or texts her husband, and she finally calls back. She acts like DH is the asshole and says basically, duh, you knew we were staying at the beach 2 more days. So basically, either we come get him (an hour and 15 min drive from our house) or we can wait until her husband comes into town for work tonight at 8:30 p.m.

Guess what?

I say to DH, we have to go get him at the beach? he says, "yes." I say, well can't she meet me? His response, "Just go get him." and all but hangs up on me. When did this become MY problem?

I just tried to talk to DH about all of it, and he acts like he's had the worst day ever and is just oh-so-tired and the last thing he wants to do is discuss this. we have him, period, end of story. HE DIDN'T EVEN THANK ME.

trying to not blow my lid. I love the kid, but the way his mom controls my husband is driving me insane.

trying to hold it together and make SS9's first night back with us after a week a pleasant one, so he actually WANTS to be with us....but his dad is pissing me off. So right now, I don't like EITHER of his parents, and I'm married to one of them and feel like I've divorced the other.

Comments

StickAFork's picture

I believe we teach people how to treat us. You, by doing what DH "orders," are teaching him that treating you that way is fine.
Telling you to just go get him and then hangs up on you is just...wrong. Disrespectful.
Take your happy ass out for a drink. When you return sans kid, remind him you are his partner and an adult, and you expect and demand to be treated as such. You are NOT his hired help.

Your problem here isn't with BM and her making DH "jump" when she says so. It's with how DH is interacting with you.

LRP75's picture

^ agreed ^

I find my SS unbearable to be around. However, I also know that he is just a child. Thus, he is not entirely responsible for his behavior. My H is the one who allows him to behave the way he does and my H is the one who treats me the way he does when SS is around. Therefore, I hold my H 100% responsible for ALL OF IT.

Shit, today my H blamed ME for leaving my coffee on the table. Apparently, if I hadn't left my coffee on the table, it wouldn't be there to be spilled when SS was acting like a fool in the living room. Yes, according my H, it was MY fault. Not SS's.

So I HATE it when this kid comes for visits. My H immediately turns into the biggest douchbag I've ever met.

Hold your H responsible, because he is.

twopines's picture

>>>either we come get him (an hour and 15 min drive from our house) or we can wait until her husband comes into town for work tonight at 8:30 p.m.<<<

I would have chosen option #2.