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I never planned on any of this..

miss.elise's picture

:jawdrop:
i have needed to vent for sometime about my partner and the journey we have taken in the last 18 months. I love the man but he comes with baggage. A lot of it.
I never thought in a million years i would fall in love with someone with kids. But i have. Three beautiful boys. They aren't the issue. Infact, i dont think my partner realises how much i enjoy spending time with them. They're awesome little characters. One has autism which to be fair has taken his toll on my partner more than once. Although we are finally understanding it more and more (thank you Good Dr. !!)
My issue is the ex-wife. (Always is isn't it....unfortunately.)

Comments

Acratopotes's picture

you have no obligation towards the ex wife, you never slept with her, she's not your friend, disengage from her...

she's not to have your contact details, block her from calling you or connecting on social media, do not even talk to her, she's your boyfriends Ex wife, not yours...

it's really easy and it will help you in the future

lieutenant_dad's picture

Sounds about right. My SSs can annoy me, but in a way that most kids annoy me. They have their quirks, and I don't alway agree with how they are parented. Overall, though, they are good kids who will have bright futures if they don't succumb to laziness.

BM is my biggest issue, and to a certain extent, my DH. There have been things he does to exacerbate the BM issues (or the few SS issues I have had), and I get far more frustrated with him.than BM because he knows better.

Like Acra said, you owe BM nothing - not your time, money, or thoughts. Let your SO handle her. Tell him not to talk to you about her. Don't talk to her yourself. Again, you have ZERO obligation to this women,l. She can spew and spout all day long about how she is the mother and just HAS to know who you are, bit ultimately, your SO has equal decision-making power when it comes to who is around the kids and the kind of relationship that person has with them.