How do you ladies deal with your MIL?
So, SD5 has been in therapy for about 6 months for developmental delays, speech problems, and sensory processing problems.
MIL still cannot grasp that there are problems and will come up with any and all excuses in the book to try to excuse it. Last week I was blamed for SD's sensory processing problems because I make her be more independent. The example of her sensory issues I used was when SD is taking a shower and decides she wants the water warmer she will reach up and just crank the handle over so then the water is burning her. Rather than turning the water back down or getting out of the water to get help she will just stand there and cry as the water burns her. I did discuss this with the OT at her last session and the OT has advised us that it is appropriate at her level for her to be cleaning herself in the shower so it's not as if I am having her do something unreasonable. Anyway, MIL says she thinks the problem is not that SD has sensory issues the problem is that I am asking her to clean herself which is causing the sensory issues.
Another example, one of the problems SD has has proprioceptive dysfunction which means she can't feel where her body is in space without looking at it and has a lot of trouble coordinating both sides of her body. An example of this is she couldn't pedal a bike without staring at her feet. She does have a big kids bike but it does have training wheels on it. It took her about 2 summers and it wasn't until she was in therapy and nearly 5 1/2 years old that she could coordinate her feet well enough to pedal without starring at her feet. She couldn't do jumping jacks until very recently and just learned to skip last month. MIL says "sometimes she looks at her feet so she doesn't trip." There are many more examples.
At this point should I even try to explain anything to her or give her a book to read on the subject or just whenever she asks how it's going tell her she needs to talk to DH because I won't discuss this with her anymore?