More ADULT SD disrespect...it's disgusting already
THANK you, my new shoulders to lean on, for helping me realize that I AM NOT THE CRAZY ONE here.
Get this....sure, it was father's day, I get it, BUT when Adult SD called (and this goes on ALL THE TIME), it's like I NO LONGER exist. He won't even acknowledge that I'm in the SAME ROOM!! ("I'm not doing anything")....is it SO BAD for me to expect that he should say "Hey, we're sitting here watching TV?"
Then, of course, he has to flit off to one SD's house for a "special din din", now he's all tired (luckily I had other plans for the evening; if I didn't, I'd be here by myself, because I certainly wasn't invited!!)
I put my FOOT DOWN on this...the NEXT TIME he accepts an invite and I am NOT INVITED, he can go LIVE with the whiny PUSHING THIRTY BRATS...what really bothers me is that last night, we had a GREAT TIME, acting like A HUSBAND AND WIFE...as SOON AS ONE OF THOSE OVERGROWN INFANTS CALLS, I'm supposed to just "disappear"....well, I AM EMOTIONALLY disappearing for
a few days....NO ONE in my family would ever DREAM of treating "us" like that.
I have spent SO MUCH money on those "girls"...AND THEY ARE NOT GIRLS, THEY ARE GROWN WOMEN (showers, birthdays), and I am NOT ONE to do so because I EXPECT something back...maybe some RESPECT.
My checkbook is now CLOSED. That's the ONLY time I'm "invited",
when there's a gift to give. And for "show", of course.
WHY DO I PUT UP WITH THIS? These are not "little girls", they are whiny JERKS who turns "daddy" into a submissive PUPPY when they demand his time and attention. I am SO HURT right now because, as I said, last night, we had a BLAST. I'm TIRED of feeling like I"m ONLY OK when the WITCHES aren't around.
Thanks for any feedback. It makes me feel SANE that many of us are in the same LOUSY BOAT. Not in a GOOD way, but as I said, at least I KNOW I AM NOT THE CRAZY ONE!!
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Wow...
There is no way he should go to any of those 'events' if you are not invited. I can see a lunch here and there with just their dad, but what the heck?! Who do these women think they are? I can't believe you hubby would put up with them making you invisible like that! Hang in there!
THANKS SO SO MUCH!
You have been AWESOME with all of your comments. The CRAP hit the fan last night, and I think YOU and everyone else who has just EMPOWERED me to stop being a PUSHOVER WIMP who lets these people treat me like garbage.
Much good karma to you!!
THANKS SO SO MUCH!
You have been AWESOME with all of your comments. The CRAP hit the fan last night, and I think YOU and everyone else who has just EMPOWERED me to stop being a PUSHOVER WIMP who lets these people treat me like garbage.
Much good karma to you!!
That's not right.
And I'm sorry you've been so slighted by these "girls" and your DH.
♥ Anne 8102, D/B/A Georgia ♥
"Good men don't just happen. They have to be created by us women." (from ROSEANNE)
Because they CAN
They treat you with no respect because they CAN. Time to disengage. The wicked stepsisters are your DH's spawn, so let HIM deal with the lovely children he raised!
NO WAY should your DH attend a gathering where you haven't been invited!! WTF??? DH is sending the message to them loud and clear that they can disrespect you, and you don't count. So they take advantage of it, of course. I hope your DH wises up soon--or he'll be alone.
My trashy adult SDs tried the "invite dad only" routine, and at first my DH fell for it. After I got in his face a few times he stopped playing their game. So did I.
Free yourself! No more parties. No more presents. No more cash. No more calls. No more reminding DH about events. No more putting up with this sh!t--life is just too short.
Sarah, YOU ROCK!!
Thanks again...I think you've been at this a bit longer than I have been, but I just can't seem to get this down. I think the thing that KILLS ME about this is that DH and I had a GREAT WEEKEND, which we usually do, until the WITCHES started calling him and grilling him on Sunday. I really don't think they MEAN to be MEAN, I just think they honestly have NO CLUE and just DON'T KNOW how to consider anyone's feelings except for their OWN. It's just that, just when DH and I are at our HAPPIEST, they "instinctively" have to nose in and mess things up. I just think they are EVIL.
I really SNAPPED last night, and they ALL KNOW that the DOORMAT is no longer in the house!! What also gets me is that DH has an awesome personality, I've met BM (granted, no "rocket scientist") but she's meek and harmless....I just think these JEZEBELS railroaded BOTH of them (no wonder BM left for a younger man...I would leave for a chimpanzee if I had to put up with these dirtballs as teenagers!)
and broke up THEIR MARRIAGE. And that's what I told DH last night for the FIRST TIME....If our marriage ENDS, you know who to "thank"...you can let EVERYONE know you chose your ADULT witches over your WIFE with whom you have all the fun in the world.
This site has empowered me SO MUCH. I just felt like a CRAZY fool for DAYS until I found this place. Other than THESE PEOPLE, I really don't have a problem in the world. It's like a FUNGUS, and I LOVE all your ideas...NO MORE ANYTHING!!! Life IS too short, and if they want to sit around and WHINE on holidays, they can have a blast...I'll be basking in FLorida!!
Okay just read this post
I had responded to your other post where you told everyone where to go! BTW - they know they are being mean and they do have a clue they are just doing it to exclude you from the picture because it sounds like that is what they have always done and your DH has always let them. SCREW THAT! Hope your DH gets a clue. Interested to know how he react to all this. I used to feel like there was something wrong with me to even though I would talk to friends and family and they were all on my side - then I found this site and I could not believe the hundreds of SMs on here and all the CRAP that everyone puts up with. I am so luck to have found this place - and again WELCOME!
YES!!
I feel like a NEW PERSON since I found this place. I used to think it was ME, too! And, the same thing has happened with me...people I work with, friends, have told me for YEARS that I'm nuts to put up with this horsecrap. A few years again, when I yelled at one of the SDs for bothering me, she sent out this huge HATE EMail to all my co-workers, my family, etc. (I actually called a lawyer over it and he asked "How old is she, 12?" And I said , no 27!! he couldn't believe it. The Email was to tell everyone what I'm "really like"...it caused a huge rift (for her) because she made a total ASS out of herself (she later apologized to all these people, but she pretty much made it clear that she's weird...oh, what I'm "like" by the way is that I'm "not all nice and professional that everyone thinks she is. She is mean and treats me and my sisters bad." or something to that effect. It was a total farce.
I know ANYONE ELSE would have BAILED over something like that. In retrospect, I should have SUED her ass and taught her a MAJOR lesson, but being the "nice guy", I accepted her apology and let it slide.
And, that's how I feel anymore!! You just accept shoddy treatment to the point where you don't know if it's YOU just being "over sensitive" or if you've just become conditioned to being treated like dirt.
This SITE has REALLY HELPED ME to find that backbone I've been looking for. KEEP IN TOUCH!!!
I survived a hate email too
My DH's #2 adult bitch SD24 tried the "email the family and the whole world about how terrible Sarah is" routine too. It backfired on her bigtime.
Now the large extended family knows just how mentally ill SD24 is, and they are aware of the human trash I had to deal with on a daily basis when it lived in my home. I know I sound harsh and, yes, hateful at times, but I am not accustomed to dealing with people who think they have a right to lash out at someone and then be forgiven the next day because they are "family."
That's the kind of B.S. that allows manipulative, evil people to have cart blanche and take out their anger on others whenever they feel the need. Not acceptable.
I refuse to let the horrible woman into my home, or engage in any conversation until she steps up and apologizes for the email situation she created. DH has also been supporting me, although he is definitely the "forgive and forget" type. I don't want to give SD24 hell or anything like that--I just want to see if the bitch can take responsibility for her actions and do the right thing.
Guess not. It's been 6 months.
OMG...we live almost the SAME things!!
This is UNREAL!! I'm almost afraid to find out what OTHER experiences we have had in common!
There's a part of me that's just too "paranoid" yet that if I reveal TOO MUCH, I swear they will FIND ME on here (some of the "stories" are so unique, they would know RIGHT AWAY I'm talking about them),
I've had to run out of my OWN house on several ocassions when they would start on me, and I just couldn't deal with it. My BD (now 16) would be in TEARS over the way they would talk to me (my BD is a great girl, and where we were trying the "big happy family" thing which, obviously "ain't workin'", I keep her as far from them as I can. DH would stand there, begging us all to STOP, but never really taking MY side. His dream from day one was "big happy family". I know there is a HUGE part of him that is OK with the fact that I STAND UP to them, because some GOOD has come of it (the endless phone calls at all hours was ridiculous....and if DH didn't answer the phone when he called? Well, whose fault do you think that was?
They would call often 9:30-10:00 at night, and I'm sure their WORST FEAR as to why "daddy" didn't answer might be coming true...he was in bed with ME...sleeping probably!!
Everything you say I feel. I am probably the most down-to-earth, laid-back person you could ever meet. (I'd reveal my profession, you probably guessed it already, but I work with lots of young people!) I'm not a yeller, not even close. But over the years, these SDs have brought out a side of me that I am ASHAMED of...I have yelled, screamed, cursed, carried on, just out of sheer frustration. I compare it to the "Bobby Brown/Whitney Houston" example. Sometimes when you are around someone who 'brings you down", you sometimes can't help but fall into the abyss with them for awhile. Then I start self-loathing and I think, AM I GOING CRAZY? This PAST week is the SANEST I have felt in YEARS just knowing that I AM NOT ALONE IN HOW I FEEL.
Regarding the Email (Two of the nasty she-devils even called my MOM to "tattle" on me for stupid things...like MY MOTHER, who RAISED ME AND THINKS THE WORLD OF ME is gonna chime in with them? My mom is OK with DH, but she was really upset at times at how he allows them to treat me with such disrespect. My mom is kind of a nosy-body, but she NEVER asks about SDs. They've ranted to her over the phone, but they have never met my mom. She (my mom) could care less about meeting them.).....and I was just thinking this today, if she (SD) EVER does anything REMOTELY close to that ever again, I'm going for the jugular.
I have begun to LOATHE those times in myself when, as you so well put it, feel "hateful", but I have to lighten up on ME and stop letting my "good person" take such a beating from these people. Again, thank you, thank you for your words. Once again, you just
"said it all!"