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In limbo again.... and that is understandable

Kevin The Man's picture

Hello All,
I have been dealing lately with a woman I cannot recognize. My SO has been in extreme pain and is going for a cervical epidural tomorrow to relieve the pain in her shoulder. I do not want her to go to fix the symptoms instead of the cause, (bone spur), but I am being supportive and have offered my help in any regards. I wonder how the pain has affected our relationship?? Upon giving her time (breaking up) I have spoken to her on several occasions and she is very resistive of my positive advances. I seem to push her away when I am trying to be proactive about our relationship.(although she smiled from ear to ear when she heard I was running again, what was that about??) When it is most convenient for her I am going to tell her that:

'Heather, I love you, I have made some mistakes in the past and with those mistakes I have both hurt you and as I have pushed the issues, I have pushed you away and you see me as a different person. I ask only for your forgiveness as I work on my issues and although I hope for a fairytale ending in all situations I understand that it MAY not happen between us, although I hope it does. I was wrong, I admit it and whole heartedly take responsibility for my actions.'

Listen ladies, I know you all have told me to move on but my heart has always been in the happiest place with my SO and her boys and I am not ready to throw in the towel just yet. Perhaps I am only prolonging heartbreak but she is a human that I LOVE !!!!

Thanks for all of your support!!

Kevin The Man

Comments

misguided's picture

You just can't help what the heart wants. I hope it works out for you and if it doesn't you can walk away knowing that you did everything you could to make it work and the guilt is not on your shoulders. Good luck. BTW pain can have an immense impact on your mood and feelings. I was in bed for 6 months and on painkillers because of a broken leg that my doctor thougt would heal itself. Every little movement hurt. I am happy to say that after surgery I am pain free and my relationship with DH has improved 100%. When your in pain everything else takes a backseat and in your mind, no one understands and is empathetic enough.

Sia's picture

out for you if that is what you want, but I do have a question for you.....

Why do you want, so badly, to be with a woman who, so clearly, does not want to be with you?

Kevin The Man's picture

:sick: I certainly wouldn't even give this another thought if I honestly thought that she didn't want to be with me. I have a 147 IQ, I think I am able to determine, and limit, her involvement and mine thanks. Thanks again for the positive feedback!!

Kevin The Man

Kevin The Man's picture

I wasn't aiming to tear your head off.

BMJen's picture

that after reading a comment like this "Upon giving her time (breaking up) I have spoken to her on several occasions and she is very resistive of my positive advances. I seem to push her away when I am trying to be proactive about our relationship." it just makes you wonder why you keep trying so hard when it seems like she is pushing you away equally as hard as you are pulling her tward you.

~all you need is Faith, Trust, and a little bit of Pixie Dust...and sometimes a machine gun~