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"Up to 50%"

justmakingthebest's picture

Does anyone have wording like up to a certain percentage of college that they are required to pay? I find it interesting that our lawyer was able to put simply" FDH to pay up to 50% of college tuition". It doesn't stipulate any type of college- community, university, grad school... It doesn't stipulate that SS has the right to pick his school, it doesn't say anything else. 

FDH is pretty devistated and knows that this is the end of his relationship with his son. He knows that the alienation has just gone on too long and it was his fault for not stopping the move 5 years ago. He kept hoping BM would do all of the things she said she was going to do and allow him to actually still be a father even after she left with SS 1300 miles away. 

Anyway, his logic is that he isn't going to pay for more than one community college course for a kid who he has no relationship with. His lawyer said the way that they worded it, should fall in FDH's favor- "Up To 50%". I don't have as much hope... this would go back before the same court system that allowed a divorce 2X only to have both thrown out- which is completely unheard of! - and then rejected out of state visitation becasue of rec baseball, even though he could play it here. And no Christmas or Thanksgiving because of basketball. --- So, somehow I don't see this actually working in SO's favor, but I think it should!

Comments

ESMOD's picture

I swear, it's so frustrating when the language in a CO is vague and not well defined.  I am sure that BM will interpret that your DH should pay half of the most expensive college that the kid can manage to get into... But, it seems that your DH may have the ability to tie his participation in part to conditions for his son.. and I would say that he might not be as generous if the boy will have no relationship with him.

Ideally, I don't like the idea of college education being stipulated in CS documents because it puts a financial obligation on the parent beyond the point where the child turns 18 and in fact is not really part of any agreement with the EX.. but in reality a promise to the minor child that they will pay for something after the child becomes an adult.  As you now see the vagueness doesn't help him decide whether it was meant to be half of any or all types of college.

I guess he can start from a position of he only will support college to the extent he feels like it.  Let them take him to court if they want.  I might also explore what courts in your state typically enforce regarding post HS education expenses.  I know NJ is pretty harsh.. but other states may not be taking a hard line.  I would be inclined to make THEM fight for more.. vs offering more.

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

My issue with the college stipulation is where they are financially. i know I received ZERO support form my parents... So just because they split the parents magically have a legal obligation to pay for college? If they can't afford it or don't want to, then I don't see why they should...

ndc's picture

That provision is so vague that your FDH will likely end up back in court when the time comes.

classyNJ's picture

SO first CO said that him and DBDB were responsible 50/50 for college.  He saved for it.  She didn't.  SS19 got partial scholarship from private college.  The last CO states that DBDB is 100% financially responsible for SS19.  HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!  She hasn't paid a dime towards anything!  When he is home he works 3 jobs during summer and 2 even when he is home for holidays.  He bought his own car, pays his portion of insurance and any extra cash he needs. We pay the remainder of his tuition!

Right now we do not have the extra $4K to have our lawyer take her back to court but will by the end of the summer.  He is going to ask for CS for SS15.  At least the $100 a month for lunches.

Teas83's picture

My husband's CO says he is required to pay 96% of college or university tuition for SD. The percentage is based on his income compared to BM's income. We're in Canada.

It's pretty brutal, in my opinion. We have two kids together and we are not obligated to pay for their university tuition. I'm not sure why CODs should be any different.

justmakingthebest's picture

I agree, I don't have anything like that with my kids and  their father. Both he and I are college graduates that had to take care of our degrees on our own. Why should our children be any different. My parents paid for my brothers tuition... he lives at home at 28 yr old and has no real responsibilities. It is a joke. I refuse to let me kids think that any one is going to "take care of them" when they are adults.