I am bad...but look @ this paper my SD wrote for school.
Keep in mind: 1) my latest post about 6 flags 2)I want to edit the hell out of the following paper....but I cannot. Why? Hey, it's her assignment, and she refuses to accept help because she knows better than ANYONE how to write. ????
(BTW SD16--ALMOST 17--is a Junior in HS. And yes we've sent her to school and we've helped her here at home and we've sent her to SYLVAN for $45 an hour and she has $100,000 in the bank for college and her dad and I are college educated AND I KNOW THIS IS A RUN-ON BUT I ADORE IRONY SO I COULDN'T HELP IT)
I don't care if I am called a bitch for this. THIS paper will offer a window into my daily life...at least in some small way.
Riding my first roller coaster:
it was the summer of 2009 that I finally discovered that the thrill you get from the riding a roller coaster was actually not terrifying but really exiting. The anticipation is the worse part standing there having time to think seeing the “beast” in front of you and the screams of the passengers it’s enough to make me run away
but then as I was standing there felling two foot small I began to wonder why am I so scared I know I am safe I can see the people walking off the ride smiling and asking to go again there was not hurt so why would the roller coaster decide to wreck me while I am on it and I know that they do inspections all day long and if anything seemed out of place they would shut it down all together. That seemed to help a bit but I am still was scared!
But once I got on and went down the first hill I knew that something had changed in me I finally faced my fear I walked off with the biggest smile on my face I conquered the beast and i am so strong! Later that day when we were resting in the shade of the park I began to wonder something my dad told me once kept coming back more people die in car wrecks then in roller coaster accidents and I have been riding in cars since I was born everyone has but no one thinks twice when they are buckling in there seat belt that what they are doing might kill them there not scared it’s just a typical day!
But getting on a roller coaster is scary but it’s safe. You hear about multiple car crashes every single day but you rarely hear about a roller coaster accident. People get scared because they are in harm’s way but that does not seem to count for cars because it’s become a thing were used to we have been doing it for ever but that does not make it less dangerous. All in all peoples fear comes from what they are not used to so I guess if someone rides roller coaster a all there life it will become less thrilling.
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I'm speechless! WOW!
"And this too shall pass..."
Now we know the reason for her theatrics
before the ride. She was playing it up so she would have something to write about.
That might be true but..
she didn't write abiut how she acted like a spoiled brat and making a scene at the park. Funny how she left all of that out!
"And this too shall pass..."
Sadly, that is brilliant and coherent compared to SD18, who still can't spell. Wonder what college admissions essays are looking like these days!
Don't worry...she won't even
Don't worry...she won't even pass the assestment tests to get into college! That 100 grand will be all yours LOL
"I child proofed my whole house, but they STILL get in!"
is in a trust. Yep. In her name, for her 18th/college. That was money well spent. LOL. G*d now I have more money than brains, huh? (kill me)
god she's stupid
how does she function on a daily basis?
she functions by not functioining (lol) or shitting on everyone here for "acting all better than me [her] or something". Yep. She has said that over and over. I swear this kid makes my HAIR HURT.
That took me like thirty minutes to
read. I kept trying to make sense out of it and let me tell ya, it didn't work!
She won't make it to college. No question.
I'm a stickler for grammar in real life so this
really chapped my ass. My eyes are almost bleeding from reading that shyte. I was developing a killer migraine simply from concentrating SO hard to make sense of this monstrosity she calls an essay. Does she have a learning disability? At least then I would be able to have sympathy and say,"WOW what a great paper!" My brother is 31 and when he was 2 a high fever caused him to have brain damage. He has a learning disability and when he was in school writing essays they looked EXACTLY like what she wrote.
Work out your own salvation. Do not depend on others. ~Buddha
Math?! LOL, funny you should ask....
She's a junior in HS and has to have VERY, VERY specialized math classes (like, to teach her how to FILL IN A CHECK to pay a bill). She transposes numbers (discalcula...sp?), and CANNOT multiply over the 6's. She can't divide at all (not kidding). She can add by using her fingers (same with what she calls "take away math"--er...subtraction?!)
AGAIN, we sent her to Sylvan for $45 an hour for math and English/grammar. We did that for about...uh, I guess $3000 worth of work. I guess you can see how it helped. UGH. (haha)
and will you marry me? LOL. I am a writer... A WRITER....and reading this killed me. OH, did I mention this was not her "sloppy copy"? This was a "corrected" version. Yes, the CORRECTED VERSION. Oh, Lord...help me please.
You guys see my blogs after 3-4 beers. Otherwise I'd have a brushed copy of everything I've written. This girl though....this girl. No beer....with editing...with advice....
I need more beer.
om my lawd.....
that was terrible..... But she didnt even ride the thing right????
She FINALLY ENDED UP...
riding some damned "roller coaster" thing at the very end.
PS she never sat in the shade of the park (as she mentioned in her "paper") and reflected on a damned thing. No lie.
But yeah, she rode one "kinda" big ride at the end...and her dad (I want to puke as I recall this) was sitting behind her, and as they took off, I saw him...his arms reached forward HOLDING HER SHOULDERS AND RUBBING HER SHOULDERS TO LET HER FEEL SECURE.
Wow...I do feel sick to my stomach. Perhaps I shouldn't remember that anymore. heh.
This looks exactly like something my SD would write!
But she was a friggin' fourth grader last year and it was in her journal.
I think the sentiment, theme, etc. was nice and cohesive, although slightly juvenile, but wow, the grammar.
Did you at least tell her she might want to proofread/edit it a little more?
What exactly do they teach
LIVE LOVE LAUGH
in high school these days? SD18 can barely spell, has problems making a complete sentence and her grammar is atrocious! I realize kids today use abbreviations and 'slanguage' to communicate via text messages and emails, but holy cow, I don't know how they get by with it in an actual high school class. SD18 can't even complete an employment application or even basic forms for school - it's unbelievable! I work at the local university and I'm amazed that some of these kids even get accepted with such poor basic skills.
Wow! I'd really like to
Wow! I'd really like to find out what her grade is going be! Has she been tested for a learning disability? The run on sentences killed me not to mention the total lack of punctuation! What have her grades been like in the past?
Poor kid...she's about at
Poor kid...she's about at dumb as my SD15...haha. Also, what is the deal with people who can't spell? Amazing, because these kids think they are SO much smarter than everyone else...especially us adults!
**Love me or hate me, I'm still gonna shine!!**
I really hope you can get
I really hope you can get the 100K for college back and that it doesn't HAVE to be spent on college because she is a 10 year old stuck in a 17 year olds body. I don't know about the colleges in your area but where I live that crap would get you a failing grade in grade 9. Lol.
I would petition a refund
I would petition a refund from Sylvan Learning Center.............
Functional illiteracy ......
Functional illiteracy ...... the result of a generation of "everyone gets a trophy" and the idiocy of "modern" nurture over performance teaching methodologies like sight reading and not using red ink when grading because it makes the kids feel inadequate and bad. (I know, another run on sentence)
Letting kids make up words and new (wrong) answers to math problems while telling them that not being able to sound out a word, butchering the language and using some crap called new math that does not require the kids to learn the material is Okay is going to move us rapidly to the bottom of the industrialized world education levels.
Though certainly not "sensitive" I can assure you that posting a big chart on the wall outside the Deans office with every one's name on it and their monthly grades next to their name motivates performance. When educators developed the "whole child" mentality and decided to do a crappy job raising other peoples children rather than teaching the 3Rs (reading, (W)riteing and (A)rithmatic) they became more of a problem than even the non participatory parents and the coddled little shit kids. Coddled little shits grow up to be big old non performing turds that suck resources out of a society rather than contributing to society.
Bringing back corporal punishment, public posting of grades and accountability, accountability, accountability will fix this crap in a hurry or provide the economy with an endless supply of burger flippers. Screw focusing on the "whole child" in school. Teach them the material and smack their asses with a paddle when they dick around when they should be behaving, focusing and performing. And fire the teachers that can't teach. Let the parents parent and put the ones who won't in jail.
I could go on forever with this but I will end my rant now.
Whew!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I feel better now.
Success is rarely final. Failure is rarely fatal. It is character, courage and consistency of effort that count. Vince Lombardi (with some minor Rags modifications) To each according to their performance, screw Karl Marx. (Rags)