I think this is finally on DH's mind, hope he arrives at some constructive conclusion but I'm not holding my breath.

SD20 is in her third year of college. She spent one year at one college, then wanted to drop out and enter a vocational program. DH convinced her to stay in college but she transferred to a college in BM's town. SD has now spent two years there, is not that much closer to graduating, and has been posting about how this is her last semester at that school, so either she is planning to transfer again or drop out.

SD20 does work, but not a lot, and she still lives in the dorms because she doesn't want to be responsible for herself. She has said this. SD's dorm room costs almost as much per month as our house, which contains four people. Why are we paying so much every month to support an adult living in posh accommodations. I told DH that SD needs to move into a less expensive apartment with a roommate and be responsible for paying that herself. She can easily get an apartment with a couple of roommates and her monthly share would be $200-$250 a month.

DH finally broached the subject to me last night about how long I lived in the dorms because SD20 is still there, and I think she pushed back on him when he told her to get an apartment. I told him I was out of the dorms as soon as the college let me be, had my own apartment at 19 and was responsible for myself.

I'm guessing SD can continue milking the "I'm just a kid in college" line for a couple of more years. But what then? Is it possible for them to never grow up? I guess it is with support from Disney dad.