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WHAT WOULD YOU DO??

Eagle Eye's picture

I'll try to give a short version of the constant lying that comes from SS14. Everything that comes out of his mouth is usually a lie!

He's supposedly on the track team at school. There have been no meets as of yet so no reason to question him...a couple of weeks ago my BD14 asked why SS didn't go to track. I said I didn't know anything about it. DH asked SS and SS said there was no practice that day. BD's friend is on track and there was practice. :?

Yesterday my mom went to pick up BD afterschool and she sent me a text to tell me she saw SS walking up the street with a couple of kids. He was supposed to be at practice. She also told me that BD had just asked friend on track team what race he and SS were doing. Friend said SS hadn't been to practice in over 2 weeks. :jawdrop: I decided to leave work and go see if he was at practice. I went and couldn't find him so I drove around to another side. I didn't want him to see me because that would look really strange. I saw a kid that looked similar to him but I couldn't swear it was him.

Today I called the coach to find out if SS was on team. Coach said he didn't recognize the name but that there was a lot of boys out there and he would need to verify and call me back. Now i'm just sitting at work wondering!! I didn't tell DH I called coach because he will think I'm just trying to cause trouble with SS. I did tell him this stuff finds me and I don't go looking for it. I told him what I my mom had seen and what friend had said.

I also asked a friend who will be in the school area today to go over there and see if SS is there. If he isn't there...what has the kid been doing everyday for 3 hours? I don't know what to do if he is lying! DH isn't good at discipline and this is always a sore subject! I just can't sit back and let SS lie to our face over and over! He doesn't come home "sweaty" and he is usually wearing jeans! He lies so much and that is the reason I don't think he really is at track!!

I sure hope I'm wrong!

Comments

spunkiedolittle's picture

I'd be doing the same thing you are, if dh (and bm-obviously) wont do anythign about it, you could just be saving this kid from hooking up with the wrong crowd.........i'd almsot take a camera with you next time you go

DeeDeeTX's picture

Why not give SS a chance to tell the truth? Tell him it seems weird he is always wearing jeans and never sweaty, so you are about to call the coach and ask if he is on the team, but before you do so, you wanted to see if there was anything he wanted to tell you.

Eagle Eye's picture

After he lied about not having practice we did ask him directly and of course he said yes. It is very unfortunate that I feel the need to resort to sneaking around but SS can lie as easily as he breathes! If I find out he is not on team he will have the chance to come clean BUT knowing him he will deny it all! Even when faced with the truth he lies.

ThatGirl's picture

There's nothing wrong with giving the coach a call to find out the skinny. No need to sneak around or send out spies. If he cared enough, his father would be making the call.

Eagle Eye's picture

I know DH cares but I think he wants someone else to parent his son! I usually stay out of it but when my BD is aware of the situation at hand I feel like I need to handle it. I can't have her think SS gets away with the lies, the bad grades, etc

Of course there is also walking the fine line between making sure I treat SS like I would my own daughter according to DH. Which means I supposed to parent his son....I think.

hismineandours's picture

One of my dd14's classmates did this. She told her mom she was in track so she could stay after school for several hours each day and hang out in the parking lot with high school kids. She also went to all the track meets as that gave her an even longer time to hang out. DD said that she changed into shorts and tshirt every day after school to make it look more convincing.

spunkiedolittle's picture

i'd almost go as far as "ok, well, after school, i'll be there to take you to practice" then DO IT when he's not in track, then ask him to come clean with what he's doing

obviously SOMEONE needs to get involved. if he IS lying, he needs to be caught.

god forbid he's hanging out with older kids smoking and getting involved with the wrong crowd and you guys get a visit from the cops because he is with people that are stealing or worse

i'd over step a mile to keep THAT from happening