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OT - Dating Horror Stories

Drac0's picture

You know you have some!

I'll start - although my tale doesn't compare to what I have read from some of you thus far - here goes:

After my separation from my ex, and before I met DW, I entered a chapter in my life that was my "Dating Dark Ages". I ended up meeting a woman online who seemed to be a perfect match for me. She was funny, she was smart and she seemed very down to earth. She warned me ahead of time that she had a son from a previous relationship but that didn’t worry me. I told her that I adore children and had hoped to have some of my own one day. This was the clincher, she wanted to meet with me.

There was just one tincy wincy little problem. My date, never posted a picture of herself on the dating site. She said she had none. She was meaning to get to it but she assured me that she was “good looking”.
Well I had already agreed to meeting so I didn’t want to seem like a Shallow Hal. We arranged for a meeting spot and all sorts of thoughts went through my mind.

When I did meet her, my jaw dropped. She was indeed a beautiful woman. I mean she was model material. I wouldn’t say it was love at first sight but I was definitely enamoured with her. I took her out to dinner where we could get better acquainted. I noticed that she had an accent and I asked her where she was from. She declined to answer that question but admitted that she was an immigrant to this country. She feared that if she told me where she was from, that I would get cold feet.

Well that got my hamster wheel turning. Where could she be from that might make me have cold feet? I immediately began running through the list of countries we have a sour relationship with “Iran”, “Iraq”, “Afghanistan”.

I even thought of “Cuba” but she was definitely Arabic in origin.
So apart from her withholding her country of origin, the date went very well. She asked me what I did for a living and I told her I was an engineer for a very respectable engineering firm. Her eyes lit up and she told me that I was very lucky to be both good looking and have such a great job. She was really doing a good job of stroking my ego...
But that was the problem that I did not see....She was the perfect date...Almost TOO perfect KWIM?

She had all the right answers, all the right moves. She flirted with me just enough to show she’s interested but not too clingy. If there was a text book on dating, she had it memorized and was putting into practice every possible move to keep me interested.

I asked her what she did for a living and she sighed saying that she was “between jobs”. She originally worked for an airline company but lost her job on account that her boss was also her ex-husband. She spun me a tale of what an abusive prick he was but she didn’t want to go into too much detail about her past. “I don’t want you to get cold feet” she said.

There was that warning again. Maybe I *should* get cold feet?

Anyways. Apart from that, the date was a success and I wanted to meet her again. We agreed to meet up a few days later. This time however, she had a surprise for me.

She brought me her CV.

She told me that she was looking for a job and if I would mind giving her CV to my company’s HR department. I told her straight out that I DO mind. For one thing, despite us having had one date, I still know little about her.

“So I am okay to date, but not okay to vouch for me as a potential employee?”.

Red flags were starting to pop up, along with that sinking feeling that I was being played....

Rather than seem like a prick, I told her that I would look over the CV and if I was comfortable with it after reading it, I would hand it in. She proceeded to ask me for the contact name of the person in our HR department. I lied and told her that I wasn’t sure of her name.

The rest of the evening entailed her asking me questions about my job and what she could do to “improve” her candidature as a potential employee. I couldn't end our second date fast enough.

After that date, I returned home, threw her CV in the trash and set my online profile to block her. She called me a few times (we exchanged phone numbers). I never picked up.

Her last message to me was “I hope you are okay with handing in my CV. If not, call me so we can talk about it.”

Comments

zerostepdrama's picture

You never looked at her CV to see where she went to school to possibly find out where she was from? Her refusal to answer that question would have drove me crazy. LOL

Drac0's picture

She was definetly from the middle east, but I could never pin-point her country of origin.

askYOURdad's picture

My best *worst* dating story is pretty silly...

When I was in college I went through this whole "I don't need a boyfriend" phase for quite some time and pictured my life as Samantha on sex and the city- ::sigh:: didn't we all? Anyway, when I got over that and did want to date I decided to broaden my horizons a little since I had always dated the same "type" I went on quite a few interesting dates but this one was hands down one of the best...

So a customer from work asked me out on a date and he wasn't anything like "my type" so I said yes. We decided to meet across the street later that week and go to dinner and attend a festival that was going on. Well, the first thing I noticed when I went to meet up with him was a bumper sticker on his car. I don't remember the exact words but it said something along the lines of "nine out of ten woman are battered.. I take mine plain" or something. Yeah, real winner! Anyway, we go out to dinner and he drove and I left my car there. We have dinner and I already knew this was going no where fast just based on conversation. The check comes and he makes a HUGE production about letting me know it's on him. He gives his card and the waiter comes back to inform him that it declined. He shrugs and provides another...not one, two or three times but FOUR cards declined and I just handed my card to the waiter. Anyway, we get back in his car and I hear "ding ding ding" and it's the sound of his gas light. I didn't say anything and neither did he, but then he asked me if I wanted to go to the festival and I simply said "well, I'm going to go because I have enough money to get in, not sure what you are going to do, btw I hope you live close" this idiot actually called me for about two weeks looking for a second date... sigh... I was about 19 at the time so don't judge me lol, I never did have that second date!

Drac0's picture

Hee hee!

Your story almost reads like Confucius lesson

"Man with bad credit rating should not pick up check"

moeilijk's picture

Ha!

I met this guy at a dance club. He was a good dancer and we talked a bit. He wanted to see me again and I agreed. We met at a restaurant and had a nice dinner. During dinner I asked him where he lived.

He lived in a camper which was usually parked behind the restaurant he worked at, but due to our dinner date was right around the block.

I went back to his 'place', had a nice time chatting with him (possibly a snog, lol) and that was that. He was a nice guy, but seriously? No fixed address IS worse than still living with your mom.

moeilijk's picture

Well, then I guess it wasn't such a bad date. I was just so surprised! I was cool about it though. Never let on that I didn't usually date turtles.

cfmommyof3's picture

Oh boy....I had a few big doozies after my divorce. Admittedly I made some really unsafe choices as well and am damn lucky nothing more then having a really bad time and being stuck for a week happened. I met a guy on line from fl. I had been with the same guy for like 10 or so yrs and he had torn down my self esteem big time. So I ate up the attention this guy gave me. Eventually he offered to pay for a flight down and back for a weeks stay. I went and actually I had a great time. His family was really nice to me (aside from his mother making comments about my being young white pretty ass in hation). I cried when I left. He brought me down for another week later on and by day 2 we both knew it was a no go. The first week he wined and dined me, took me to parties and clubs he was known at. The second week he informed me as his woman he would expect to go to work, come home, shower and lay in bed at which point I was to bring him his dinner. During all this I would also be expected to have a full time job, take care of the house and the kids, etc. He literally was to go to work, come home and get catered to. WTF!?! I was stuck until my return flight at the end of the week. I still brought him his dinner and shit so he wouldn't give me dirty looks and crap but omg. Oh and I wasn't aloud to smoke ciggs out front anymore b/c some random guy stopped to ask for my num out there and Im from the country where we are mostly nice to everyone so I wasn't rude but didn't give my num and yes I lied and said there was someone else in the house. I then told the guy I was staying with and his 2 cousins what happened and I was made to stay out back if I wanted to go outside unless one of them where there to go outside with me. His cousins wife took pity on me and took me shopping and out to lunch one day. But wow. When I got home I was like you know Im never coming back right> He says I know. Then tries to contact me months later saying he can be better...ummm no no no. Could have been a much scarier situation I know and Im not proud of having put myself in that place. However between my ex husband, this guy, and the one I met more locally after him I appreciate my DH so very much! Turns out Im meant for a small town hard working honest good father Smile On line dating can be a crazy crazy ride....just saying....

Drac0's picture

Wow! You know what, the sister of the lady who introduced me to DW went through a situation very similar to that! She was swept off her feet by some dude in a foreign nation and uprooted herself to be with him. She returned with tales of abuse and being forced into slave labor! Guy ran a dance club and expected her to work the bar. She was paid under the table but then was expected to pay for food and other incidentals and was expected to cook/slave after him!

Scary sh*t!

cfmommyof3's picture

Wow...Yeah I was a little scared of just going to another state that I knew was a longgggg drive if I needed saving. But I had talked to him for a long time and my family had all the info and knew if they didn't hear from me every day by a certain time to do something about it. I deff wouldn't have gone out of the country. Although the diff between where I live and how things are in the area of FL he lives in might as well be 2 diff countries. And Im not racist or anything but I deff would never ever date another hation after that experience. They weren't all like that but his immediate family and he were deff not what I would consider a great SO. I was so depressed and upset the second week I was there. My best friend and DH (also my very good friend at the time) kept trying to figure out how to get the time off from work to come get me....Love those 2! But I was like I got myself into this, I will deal till the end of the week. Deff a lesson learned!!!!

Drac0's picture

I think I may have come across the male counterpart to your profile.

The site (Match(dot)com I think?) has these FAQs about you

Before writing up about myself, I wanted to see what the "competition" was writing. I came across this guy....

Who do you look like?
I look like death warmed over

What are you looking for in a mate?
Someone who can tell me to go to hell with a smile.

What is your favorite food?
Anything organic and in-organic

What is your ideal date setting?
Anywhere where there is an escape hatch

Shaman29's picture

Every single time!

I'll tell you what worked best for me during the screening process. My answer to if I had children.

Children?

None. Or at least none that I know about.

The men who got the joke were elevated to the next stage. The men who explained to me why I would know if I had kids or not were rejected.

Shaman29's picture

Not at all, as long as it's not too presumptuous of me to assume you won't mind my "flare up".

Drac0's picture

I met a girl in a goth bar once who insisted that vampires were real. We didn't date or anything but based on your experience, I wonder what would have happened if we went out on a date...Should I have booked a cemetary?

Rhinodad's picture

I have a pretty good story... And although I don't share it often, I'm anonymous here so what the hell.

After my ex and I split I took some time and then decided to try online dating (this was shortly before I met DW). Match.com is what I used. Met some women and talked to them, not much happened until there was this one woman who had a "featured" post that I messages and she messaged me back.

We agreed to go on a date and things went very well from my point of view, invited her to my place, we ended up going to my room (if you know what I mean). Anyway, she had told me she had a child up front, that was fine, and we seemed to hit it off. We dated for several more months, had some fun... but I was never allowed in her house (where she was living with her parents), and things started to just not feel 'right.' Anyway, one day she calls me up and tells me she is pregnant - despite us using birth control. She explained that she had a tubal pregnancy before and only had one tube left... A week or so later she tells me that it is another tubal pregnancy and that she needs help paying the doctor's bills.

Red flags were going off, so I told her to send me a bill and I'd see what I could do. It took over a week but she finally met me with a doctors bill in hand. I agreed to help pay it, gave her $500 then. Big mistake. She continued to pester me for money for the next couple of days (I am not rich by any stretch) said she had the issue taken care of but still had bills, etc. Well, I had a vacation scheduled by myself and did some thinking while I was gone that I wanted to end this relationship, so I told her when I got back, she wanted to "work it out." A few weeks later I went to a friend's wedding and met my future wife (now DW) there. We started dating long-distance, and Skyped a lot. One day while I was talking to her on skype my parents called me and told me that the police for the city where I lived had just called them looking for me and to call this officer back ASAP.

So I had to hang up with future-DW on Skype and call this officer. Turns out this psycho had stolen my class ring out of my dresser (and god knows what else, I sure don;t), and pawned it! It had my name, class, etc. The police had been investigating her for insurance fraud and saw her go to the pawn shop. Anyway, they asked me if I wanted to press charges, I said yes - now knowing that the pregnancy thing was a SCAM too. Two days later I get this nasty email from her saying that we needed to talk - that the police just came by and arrested her in front of her parents and young son, etc. My response: "You should have known that was a possibility when you scammed me."

Talked with the officer assigned to her insurance fraud case and provided the old receipt... which she had doctored. Anyway they nailed her on something else related to that and the insurance fraud. So I was left with the impression of my online dating experience as a very expensive prostitute. Needless to say, I always recommend against online dating when people ask me.

Drac0's picture

Hm...Makes you wonder how many other single guys she scammed.

Glad to see things ended well for you though!

Rhinodad's picture

I'm sure there were many.

My DW knows the whole story - I told her pretty much immediately - and she says that is is amazing that I dated her after dealing with my ex and then the scammer. She says she would have thought that would ruin women for any man.

Gabriels Mom's picture

I have two really bad dates I went on. 1 was a blind date arranged by a friend and the other I met online after the blind date fiasco.

Blind Date: A friend of mine set me up with this guy. She said he was perfect for me-yea right. I was stupid and let him pick me up from my house. He was HORRIBLE to the waitress and she was an adorable teenager who was trying really hard. He berated in front of everyone over a stupid mistake. He wanted tea with lemon and I ordered tea without. She didn't give him a lemon wedge. he went off on her like she had brought him something he was allergic to. I was embarrassed. The entire date was Blah blah blah me blah blah blah me. Like he actually told me everything he could think of from work to his golf game. UGH. He stiffed the waitress but I gave her a twenty on the way out. Then we went to a movie. I was seriously panicking because I had no escape my car was at home and if I thought if I had to spend 5 more seconds with him I would stab him in the throat. Then I remembered that a really good friend of mine worked at the mall across from the movie theater and was probably at work. In the middle of his yammering I stood up and said "I have to pee" (He said I was rude) I ran across to the mall and luckily my friend was working that night and let me stay until they closed and he took me home. Dude stalker called me for a week and told my friend I was a bitch.

Online date: I went to dinner with this guy that was attractive and seemed nice. We had been there for about 30 mins and he said "You are actually much prettier in your pictures than you are in person" I had no idea how to respond I just said "Oh" He got up a few minutes after our food had arrived and disappeared to the bathroom so I got up and dumped my drink in his plate and spit in mine in case he decided to eat mine and left. He sent me a nasty email but I just ignored it. A few months later I met DH when we connected on FB I asked him if I looked like my pictures and he said yes. I asked him if they looked touched up or something and he said no. So I don't know what that guy's problem was....

Rhinodad's picture

You online date reminds me of one my wife told me - she went on a date with a friend of a friend. At dinner, after the usual pleasantries he asked "would you consider getting breast implants?"

She was so taken aback, she just got up and walked out.

cfmommyof3's picture

was her date with my brother in law? Geez....(seriously my sister married one of these fine types...and yes got implants...uggg)

herewegoagain's picture

LOL :sick:

goincrazy.com's picture

hahahahaha :sick:

cfmommyof3's picture

OHHHH I forgot about the one I met on a dating site..it was free..forget what it was but all his pics were great. We talked over the phone ALOT. He had a really nice voice. He even sent me jewelry from tiffany's and stuff. He lived near my best friend in Maine at the time. I had planned a trip with my son and brother to go out and see her and I met up with him while I was out there (best friend watched my son for me). All the pics I had seen of him were chest, head, and arms. He was big on body building. So I meet him and he has this tiny waist and really short scrawny legs. OK some ppl are shaped odd and I try not to judge by just looks. Well some things we talked about started not matching up. I got home and did some phone checks and paid for a minor detailed background check. He told me he was 26 I think. I was about 23 at the time. Turns out he was friggin 39 years old!!!!!!! He deff didn't look it. I was pissed. SO I tell him that's a huge effin lie so he turns around and tried to put a downpayment on a house for me! Seriously showed me the papers and everything. I said wow...you need to either get your money back or plan on living there by yourself cuz Im staying at my parents house...I don't get how someone can lie like that, then make a gesture that huge to try and save it. Ummmm dude your old enough to be my father! During all of my stupid dating situations DH kept saying one of these days your gonna call me and Im gonna have to come save you and kick someone's ass, why don't you just go out to dinner with me instead?.....A few shitty dating experiences later including the other one I wrote about above and I finally said yes to dinner with him. ( I was afraid I would ruin our friendship by dating him). Again...on line dating can be crazy crazy!!

blayze's picture

These are great!

I frequented Plenty Of Fish (Plenty of Shit) and met a lot of guys...there I realized that men hide baldness like women hide belly fat. When a woman does it - you know, only has face pictures taken from waaaay up high - we call it "headshotting" a guy. I think the male equivalent is "baseballcapping."

Before POF dating, I met many men through my professional networking groups. Guys with money have no problem buying your love...I even had one give me wrapped present(s!) on the first date! >>>what the heck is that about?

***
But here's my dating story that took the cake...
A SUPER HOT guy asked for my number at a gas station. We talked on the phone that night and we set a date for the weekend.

He called me while I was on my lunch break a few days before the date. We're chit-chatting for a few minutes, and all of a sudden, I hear him panting hard while I was talking...about something random, like my favorite color. He started getting louder...and louder...then moaning...and I realized that he was doing THAT. On the phone. While I'm talking. At work. I was appalled. I got off the phone with him and told some people at work who knew about my date. One of my co-workers started calling this guy "Jack-Off Jamal".

That's not the end of the story, folks.

I actually went out with him...3 times...and dealt with him jerking off on every other phone call until I couldn't take it anymore. :jawdrop:

In my defense, he was SUPER HOT...did I mention that? Blum 3 AND he was a good tipper. That has to count for something, right?

libra2libra83's picture

I tried the online dating site OKCupid after my fiancee and I broke up. I went on a date with a guy that I really got along with, at least online. I drove about an hour and half to go on a date with this guy "since his car was in the shop." We had a great date with dinner, where they ended up closing the restaurant around us. I went home, and he called me a the next day to set up another date. I agreed.

After that, I noticed a woman kept checking out my profile (since this site allows you to see who is looking at your profile, and even calls them "Stalkers") When I looked at her profile, she had pics of the guy all over it. Found out that they were part of a poly-amorous relationship that consisted of 4 guys and 3 girls...and they were recruiting.

Lets just say that if I wanted to have Sister-Wives and Brother-Husbands, I wouldn't have moved when I turned 18.

I called him and cancelled our date, explaining to him that I had no intention of continuing this relationship. He didn't take it well, and ended up calling my phone so many times (about 300 by the time he quit) in a row that I had him blocked.

herewegoagain's picture

This was not really per SE a dating experience, but it was the craziest thing I have ever done.

Met someone online (from TX)…this was years ago, when CompuServe if you are old to remember that), was on and AOL was just starting as well. We talked online all the time. Then I met another guy (from FL) and a lady (from MI) who also used to talk online to this person and we all became "pretty good friends". The other guy I met had also "met" online the "sister" of the guy (from TX) I had met. So in total there were 5 of us who talked to each other regularly. After about 6 months of talking online, we started having phone conversations with each other. One day, out of the blue, the one guy I met from FL calls me and tells me "I need your help!" Whispering (he was literally hiding in a closet in his home) he told me that the girl from TX he had met (i.e. the sister of the guy I had met), had gone to FL to see him…and that HE thought the guy from TX I had met did NOT really exist, but it was rather the girl pretending to be both a guy and a GIRL!!! lol I worked for an airline at the time and checked to see what this "girl's name" really was and found that another person from CA had actually made the reservation. So, crazy me, I called the girl from CA to ask how she KNEW this person. The girl from CA was incredibly sweet and told me "oh my, that girl is NUTS! I thought it was her and her brother and I used to talk to her brother all the time…once I flew to TX to see HIM and could not find him…I kept driving around and around and "SHE/HE" kept giving me wrong directions. I finally left. I think that it's actually a GIRL and she's just crazy pulling women making them THINK she's a guy. lol SOOOOOO what did I do? I called the guy from FL immediately and told him what I had been told. He asked me to fly to FL to "confront" this nut and yep! you guessed it, I DID! ugh…Anyway, the next day I was on a plane and landed in FL. The guy from FL met me in a brand new convertible Mercedes…he was not cute, but just the sweetest guy. We went to his house and the whole way there planned what we would do. It was freaky and crazy. I remember sitting in the garage, in the car, while he went inside and then he called me in. When the GIRL from FL saw me, we both confronted her…she flipped out…started crying, saying her "brother' really existed…lol Anyway, the guy from FL took her back to the airport that day and put her on a plane back to Texas. That was the end of that story. Actually, the GUY from FL and the lady from MI and I became great friends after that. We would joke about the craziness of what drove us to fall for this crazy nut and really helped each other get through some very tough times in life. I will forever be thankful for the other two I met. We never heard from the NUTTY GIRL again…lol

And there you have it…it took me a LONG time after that to date anyone. I actually only dated one other guy for about 3 months before I dated DH.

tiny kitten's picture

Not as crazy as some of these stories, and rather short, but it had a huge effect on my life.
It was my first boyfriend. I met him through my best friend. We saw each other a bit, and at a party one night, he asked me out. I said yes, and he kissed me. My first kiss.
I later found out that after I left the party, he kissed two of my friends.
Three months later, I found out he was cheating on me with my best friend- the girl who introduced us.
I became very good friends with her male best friend. She stole my boyfriend, so I stole her best friend. Guess which relationship lasted longer?
Nine years later, male best friend is still my friend. Neither of us have much to do with her.
Childish story? Yes, but I have an amazing friend that I wouldn't have otherwise.

not2sureimsaneanymore's picture

I'm probably the worst date because of how absolutely oblivious I am. Here are a few of my idiotic moves.

A guy friend (who is a hottie btw but who I had known since grade school) who was the same age but a year below began wooing me... without my knowledge. He'd ask me for help in tutoring for math, which I did, either at his house or mine until a few months after, he asked me to tutor him at a coffee shop. Sure. As I'm explaining away a calculus equation, he leans in really close to me (I think to get a kiss, the 80-20 rule?) and I looked at him and said, point blank, "You're invading my personal space." Yeah, he asked for tutoring a few more times but nothing ever came of it. I was so engrossed in that damned calculus equation I actually got upset he was interrupting me with his physical closeness!

A guy (from London, hot, wrestler, super cute English accent) once asked me to coffee... to which I replied, "Sorry, I don't drink coffee." (because I hate coffee), told him to have a nice day, and left. I went home and looked myself in the mirror, realized what I did, and was like, "You idiot!!!" to my reflection.

DH took me to see the Dalai Lama at Radio City Music Hall for the first date--but all his other ones fell flat on its face. Every movie he took me to saw made him want to crawl into a hole and die after. The new Karate Kid, Suckerpunch, you know, the movies that the trailers looked good for but actually sucked. He would beg me to never speak of them after we watched them. Hahaha.