I don't know!
I am new to this blogging thing... I have for years struggled with one step child in particular. I am a good person, but he makes me feel like the worst person in the world, indirectly of course, it's my own inner conflict and how I should feel vs how I actually feel! I don't know how to explain it... But here goes nothing... My step son is currently 25 years old, I became is step mother when he was 10! He has always been a rude, disrespectful person, even as a child. He is so very selfish in nature. These dreadful characteristics still very much exsist except now he is an adult who lives in a camper on our land behind our house. He hasn't maintained steady work EVER. He doesn't financially contribute to our home and just takes and takes and takes, he has the most entitled attitude I have ever seen. I struggle emotionally on a regular because this is my husband's son, my daughter's brother, and his mother died almost ten years ago. I love him but I don't know how to love him, which is weird because I love his brothers and we all have a healthy relationship... The sight of him pisses me off, I can't stand to see my husband give him access to even basic ammentities because he doesn't do anything to earn them. His mother is gone, and we are it, he tells me just to give him time to come to terms with how he knows he must handle this situation, he knows it isn't right and he will handle it, but he has said this since the boy turned 18. He isn't a child anymore, and I strongly feel like he will never take responsibility for himself unless he is put in a position to have to. I have pleaded, fought, begged, and even spent days ignoring my husband behind this mess. We fight, we make a plan, my husband doesn't hold to that plan, my step son always manipulates the situation. I have pleaded and even ripped him a new one in regard to how is lifestyle and overall disregard for anyone but himself is unhealthy for me and his dad and how it effects his sister, our family as a whole and he laughs, makes fun of our family concerns, says things like "oh you wanna be in your feelings today" or " Are you done crying now" or "you feel better now that you go that off your chest" or something as equally inconsiderate and rude.He disrespects my family I feel like a monster because I just want to put him out, and frankly I wouldn't care if he had to live under a bridge. We all make our choices! His days of free loading are over. But my husband has said next year for 7 years, and here we STILL are on the neverending emotionally exhausting merry go round. I'm tired of the light at the end of the tunnel getting further and further away when it should be getting closer.