I spent WAY too much money. It's the only thing I regret. It was a great party but if I could do it over, I'd have a destination wedding and get rid of the major part of people that I had to invite out of obligation. If they can't come, then I'm not that important to them.

Dear CBCharlotte,
Congrats on your upcoming wedding! That is fantastic, and I am sure it will be everything you every dreamed of....
To answer your question, the one thing I regret wasting my money on was the Professional Video. I know many would have different thoughts on this, but the video of my wedding was SO costly, and when viewing it, VS. viewing everyone else's video's at my wedding, I like the informal, candid, in the moment video, rather than the video produced by the Photographer.
Just food for thought...Oh yes, and also , I missed my cocktail hour because my Photographer INSISTED we take a ton of photos during that time...The wedding goes by WAY too fast to miss any parts. My suggestion is to make sure you attend your cocktail hour and get to socialize, if indeed you choose that for your wedding....I wish I had not missed that part...
Best of luck and Best wishes and congrats again !!!

I spent too much on my wedding dress I regret that. I don't regret the two hundred to get my hair and makeup done though it made me feel so pretty I felt I could have gone with a plainer dress and let my face shine more.

My first wedding was beautiful. We planned it for a long time and it went off perfectly down to the smallest detail. That marriage did not last. When I married DH we had a flash mob wedding. The beach we had our first date at doesn't allow weddings, so I got a new dress, not a wedding dress persay but a nice dress...I still wear it...DH got a matching shirt, his friend got ordained over the computer and as we all bombarded the beach it took less than 10 minutes. It cost all of 100$. Originally he wanted a big wedding, and I told him we need to plan our marriage and not so much a wedding. The marriage lasts forever, a wedding lasts a day. I'm not saying don't have a wedding or there are they are pointless, oh heavens no, I'm just saying do what you feel is special to you and not worry about what anyone else thinks about it. This is your day and his day, as long as you two are happy with the outcome and the meaning that's all that matters. Best of luck to you as a Mrs.

Congrats, woman! You are so smart to be thinking about saving money on the DAY. I LOL'd at the pocket for Chapstick. Can't leave home without it. It goes by too fast and you'll regret not spending that money on a fabulous honeymoon or even something more practical.

I'm thrifty as hell, so my wedding was cheap. Less than $10K for the wedding AND the honeymoon (7 days all-inclusive at a resort in Turks and Caicos in the Caribbean...incredible honeymoon!).

Here are a few tips:
-- Long wedding dress - with KEDS or some other canvas shoe for the reception. I decorated mine with lace and pearls and they were so comfy under my dress while dancing.

-- Invitations and programs can be printed at home like you mentioned

-- Fake flowers... the craft store had beautiful silk flowers that I made into bouquets. I got to have purple, fuchsia, and blue calla lillies as my bouquet, and I got to keep it. So beautiful!

-- Save money on a DJ. Our "Master of Ceremonies" played our pre-made music CD's for free as a gift to us. My ex was a big music buff, so together we planned the music for every part of the service and the reception. It was such a hit with our family and friends!

-- The booze - buy bottles. We got it catered at the ski resort where we married, but they had the option of per glass or per bottle...we chose the bottles and saved money.

-- The bridal shower - have a honeymoon raffle (tell them about it ahead of time). Each ticket is a buck or $5 and they get a beautiful prize/gift. You can make some serious cash if there are a lot of people there.

-- Pay an extroverted young person to videotape your wedding and have them go up to people during the reception and ask them for "advice for the couple"... you will enjoy these alcohol-induced "well wishes" from your peeps more than the boring video that a videographer produces.

-- The coolest part of our reception, and a gift that I now make for other people, was the "Memories" video. We had a screen, a projector and a laptop, and right before the dinner, our Photographers played this video.
It featured:
Pics of the groom from baby to adulthood set to a song
Pics of the bride from baby to adulthood set to a song
Pics of the bride and groom together set to a duet
Our Photographers even threw in pictures from the wedding a few hours before at the end of the video. There wasn't a dry eye in the house!

Good luck!!

I didn't have a wedding when I got married the first time. When DH and I married a year and a half ago, I planned the entire wedding and I was so glad that I was older. I didn't care about so many of the things that young people feel are so important. We used a local venue with a good reputation and good food. DH's main contribution was insisting on the extra for a full open bar during the entire wedding. The guests loved it. We printed all the invitations, name cards, everything ourselves. We used an on-line site, picked our pattern, ordered the blanks and printed them at home on an everyday printer. They came out awesome. I chose one flower, red roses and made the table settings myself. I bought vases at Michael's craft store. Very easy. Our wedding party was DH and I and the kids. No groomsmen or bridesmaids, so much simpler. Also made the ceremony go a lot smoother than some I've seen. We had a DJ. The best thing I did was put the children at one table and adults at the other tables. We had 9 children attending that were family. I bought an individual wedding favor for each child based on their age, sex, etc. After the ceremony/dinner they played with their item and were occupied allowing the adults to enjoy themselves.

Most of all, remember to enjoy the experience.

DH and I had a great wedding. Second one for both of us. Only two regrets. I wish DH and I would have spent more time together greeting guests. Seems we were apart for most of the reception. The other thing I'd do differently is to make sure the photographer knew who my family was. LOTS of pictures of DH's family; hardly any of mine.

Eloped for my first wedding, came to regret it.

DH and I had a beautiful and small wedding. Too old to invite anybody out of "obligation." Only well loved people were there.

My regrets:

1. Wish I had spent on a day-of wedding planner. At the time, I thought it was ridiculous. But it turns out, even though I thought I told people where they were supposed to be and when, they really didn't get it. So the only one who know all the details of the event was me. Um. I was the bride. Big logistical problem there.

1a. I would have also told this wedding planner their single biggest priority was to monitor SDthen13. Keep her away from the groom. Keep her away from her brother. Plant her near her favorite aunt and threaten the aunt with a cattle prod if she even thinks of taking her eyes off the kid.

2. My other regret might be about the videographer. Didn't hire one, didn't think I'd want it. However, our officiant came up with some great vows which we heard the first time as we stood before him that day. So now I have no record of what our actual vows were! Have asked for a copy, have accepted I'll probably never get it.

One of my favorite parts:

Got married in the morning. It was awesome! No DJ. Guests got lunch and a cruise (and a favor). And then they got their lives back. Sorry, but I've been to one too many weddings where I felt trapped for hours and hours. Felt real happy not to be guilty of that. And it was fantastic seeing my bridegroom in a morning suit!

Most favorite part:

When we started talking about dates, DH named one just two months off. I was shocked, then flattered that he was so eager. We decided to go for it. The wedding isn't the big thing, the marriage is. We probably would have had a bigger turnout if we'd given people a bit more notice, but we got what we really wanted: marriage to each other.

For our guest book, I had 2 polaroid instant cameras set up next to a black sketchbook with blank pages. Everyone took polaroids of themselves and taped them into the book. I had Black & Gold Sharpies next to the book, people wrote their wishes on the guest book next to their photos. I still have this book on my cocktail table and I was married 5.5 years ago. Its fun to look thru it every now and then.

My fondest memory of our wedding was buying my first family bible and signing it at the wedding. It was a part of the ceremony. My sister sang while we signed in front of the guest. DH and I kept our wedding very simple because we didn’t have a lot of money (didn’t want my mom paying for everything) and we didn’t have a lot of time. We were both deploying to Iraq that following month. Get a good photographer for sure! I wish I had a professional photographer at my wedding but we couldn’t afford it. Flowers die but photos are forever. Also, for my bouquet I had fake flowers. Don’t judge lol. They were very pretty and my mom designed it. I still have them 6 years later.

DH and I eloped at the same location we had our first date. Very public place. I wore a white sundress, he wore a suit with a tie I picked out of his favorite sports team. Our good friends, one ordained, officiated and took pictures. Two more friends witnessed. We took some more pictures, and then all went out to dinner for a great family-style meal.

I didn't bother with flowers. I made my own birdcage veil. It was so easy, and it came out beautifully. I had no video, and another friend gave me a good reason to skip it: I remember my wedding through my own eyes. I will never look at a video of it and be embarrassed by my fat arms, bad posture, or flat-footed walk. Instead, I remember being a super classy diva on my wedding day.

I once went to a friend's wedding where they encouraged guests to send their photos to a specific address, saying "we would like to have images of the party from your point of view". After everything, they had to sort through lots of pictures to select what to print, but some of them were really awesome!
It was a pretty fun touch and everyone felt they were participating.
I think they have apps for that nowadays.

I got really stressed trying to organize our wedding, my husband was a great help but I had a short time frame to organize it and also had to change the caterers, venue and officiant all within the last 3 weeks for a variety of reasons. My saving grace was that my husband had insisted that we book ourselves a wonderful honeymoon and it was amazing to be able to go away together and relax after all that stress. Even if you can't afford much, make sure to book a couple of nights away to allow you to recuperate and enjoy being together.

I still haven't gotten around to organizing the wedding photos to get them printed and into an album. My brother in law did the photography and did a great job. I'm sure a professional could have done it to an amazing standard but free is free and a great price.

I would say think about what bits of a wedding really mean something to you and you like at weddings you have been to. Personally for me it was having as many friends and family there as possible (so making sure the date and venue suit as many as possible), offering guests an open bar (I always resent having to pay at a bar when i go to weddings), using my grandma's recipe for a wedding cake, and having a great time dancing with friends and family. The other things I wasn't as fussed about so those were the places that I made compromises and savings.

Not that you have to, but these were the places where we saved money:
- I made and decorated my own wedding cake, my husband bought a chocolate cake from cost-co for an alternative
- I made the wedding stationary. I found some reduced wallpaper on sale in my wedding colors and bought a few rolls then used that for the stationary as well as table runners
- for table decorations we painted some plastic plant pots cream then planted them up with plants in the wedding colors, that way we didn't need to arrange anything or worry about them wilting
- for other flowers I got a local florist to do my and bridesmaids (just 2, fewer bridesmaids is cheaper!) bouquets and one other arrangement to decorate the room with
- my husband and the best man brewed the beer, then we served bubbly and beer (along with soft drinks)
- bridesmaids dresses were purchased off the rack from a regular store so that the bridesmaids could use them again and also so that there was no wedding premium
- brother in law did the photography
- mother in law made my wedding dress (she is an excellent seamstress), the dress was still expensive because I chose gorgeous material but a lot cheaper than the equivalent would have been from a store.
- we tried to have a friend officiate, but he dropped out at the last minute so we had to pay someone, but she was great and we had a lovely service with her so I am glad that we did.
- we got a venue that could be used for the service, dinner and dancing and it also came with tables so no need for extra rentals
- we didn't have any fancy transport to the venue from the hotel, we just used cars and taxis - I think we made the taxi drivers day when he drove me, my dad and 2 bridesmaids to the venue all dressed up! (and he got a nice tip too!)
- we got a hairdresser for the ladies, but rather than getting her to do make up too, I treated myself to some expensive cosmetics and got a demonstration in store how to apply it all myself.
- I modified some of my grand mothers old earings into hairslides and used that in my hair rather than buy a tiara or something else
- we made jewelry for gifts for the wedding party
- we didn't bother with favors for the adults but got the kids some pez.

We still ended up spending a fair amount on the wedding and it was more than we had budgeted (you will go over budget) but we made sure that everything was affordable for us so that I have no regrets over spending that amount.

The other thing I would say is to talk to your husband about what he wants to happen on the day and how he plans to spend it. At the wedding I didn't spent much time with my husband and I felt a bit resentful during the day but afterwards he told me that he had been running around organizing everything to make sure that I had a great time and he was instantly back in my good books! So now I look back and think how sweet he was to do all of that work for me and to be thinking about me but if I had known that was what he was up to I could have either helped out or felt happier that he had everything under control.

Oh and I told my husband that if he heard from BM that I didn't want to know. I have no idea if she contacted him on the day or prior to it or whatever but I didn't want to be thinking about her on my wedding day! (She had been trying to break us up and get back with him leading up to the wedding).

Sorry it is so long, I just started typing and lots of things came out!