Some things have come to light regarding SS and BM's treatment of him at her house. SS told a counselor his mom has held a rag/towel over his mouth until he stops crying. A report is in the process of being filed and a social worker is getting involved. We, and pretty much every other adult in his life, have known that the way she talks to him is basically emotional abuse, but SO was always told that a report couldn't be made because it is difficult to prove, even though his teachers, therapist, etc. are all mandated reporters :? SO did make a report at one time, but nothing ever came of it, and he was told there was not enough evidence. SS has never told either of us about anything of this nature, and obviously it is a huge concern.

So to my point. SS's therapist has kind circled around the idea that SO should get full custody of SS due to BM's inability to be an adult and a parent (she can't give him advice on the matter or tell him what she thinks he should do). As we all know the process for getting custody is long and drawn out, which could potentially make the environment at BM's worse for SS during the process. In light of the recent event, the therapist has thrown out the idea of filing an order for protection on behalf of SS in order to keep him out of her care, then trying to get custody. SO is stuck and doesn't know what route to take. Or if he has enough to get SS out of her house. Before I continue I'll just say that yes, SO will be consulting with an attorney to try and get some advice, but it's not possible for us to pay an attorney for what could be a protracted custody battle. Right now I am just looking for any advice you people who have been through this, or know the legal system, might have in case we do have to go it alone. I hate just sitting here, waiting.

So some questions. We are in MN. Is one incident report enough to get emergency custody (although we do have texts, emails, statements from teachers, counselors, daycare providers, and a recommendation from the therapist)? Would this one incident be enough to file an OFP against BM? Mn does have court forms available, but a form for emergency custody is not one of them, and court administrators keep telling SO to talk to an attorney. I've tried googling it to see if I could find an example, but no luck. Anyone ever done one of these? Oh, right now they have joint custody, week on week off.

There's probably more that I want to ask or stuff about the situation that I left out, but can't think of it right now....
I just feel so badly for SS. We have tried giving SS ideas of what he can do when mom gets mad, and have told him he can tell her to stop when she's being mean to him, but he says "it won't work. She doesn't care and she'll do it anyway". Telling her what she's doing is hurting him didn't work, because she's the mom and she doesn't need to be told what to do.