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Possible change in the future

Bobbi's picture

This is my BF’s weekend to have his daughter, anyway, he says to me this morning that she is going to spend the night at her BM because her cousins (girls) are spending the night. He goes on to say that the reason for this is the cousin’s dad is interviewing for a job in another state.

I said, “That’s nice.” He says, “I hope he gets the job.” I asked him why. He told me because it is a “PAIN”. What is? Her wanting to spend time with her cousins? He says, “Yes.” He thinks with the cousins out of the way, she will want to spend more time with him. I told him it is not unusual for a 13 year old girl to want to spend time with other girls her age, I did.

I know I am supposed to be supportive and empathetic of his feelings, but I just can’t. I can’t help but feel my BF is being selfish. All he is thinking about is how this change could affect him. Um, what about your daughter?

I’ll admit that I’m being selfish, too. Although I would never share my feelings on this subject with my BF, I would dread it if they moved away. Those girls actually save me from a lot of weekend drama.

I know this is something that is out of our control and I will have to deal with it, if and when it happens.

I am a little worried though.


stepmom to be's picture

I know what you BF's 10 year old spends lots of time at playdates (without dad) during the visitation time, and I am always relieved that she has somewhere to go!!

I know that my BF doesn't really know how to relate to his older daughter during this stage, so he's just trying to connect (though he's not trying too hard, as far as I can see, but I digress)...I don't blame you at all for your angst over the possible change!

Let us know what happens...